


let go of fear

by onlydaisy



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Bisexual Sokka (Avatar), Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gay Zuko (Avatar), M/M, Minor Aang/Katara, Oblivious Zuko (Avatar), Past Sokka/Suki (Avatar), Past Sokka/Yue (Avatar), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Sokka (Avatar), Racism, Sokka (Avatar)-centric, Yearning, Zuko is an Awkward Turtleduck, but still in the atla universe, no one knows aang is the avatar, roku stopped the 100 year war but ozai is still an asshole
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:21:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 79,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27642695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onlydaisy/pseuds/onlydaisy
Summary: Sokka might have a personal vendetta against anyone from the Fire Nation, but he wasn't going to stop that from letting him get an education. He especially wasn't going to let the hot asshole that seemed to be everywhere ruin any of it for him.ORA very self-indulgent enemies-to-lovers college AU
Relationships: Aang/Katara (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 232
Kudos: 384





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A few notes about the mess of a universe I've created for this before we begin:  
> 1\. The 100-year war was stopped by Roku and he decided to retire in hiding for the century of peace that followed, so everyone thought the Avatar cycle was over/the Avatar was no longer needed, so Aang was born around the same time as the rest of the gaang and no one, including him, knows he's the avatar.  
> 2\. Ozai is still an asshole. He's not actively taking over the world and attempting mass-genocide, but there's some dodgy stuff going on behind-the-scenes that will be revealed soon enough.  
> 3\. I'm following most of the pre-atla canon other than this, but everything that differs should be explained in-text (if you're confused about anything pls drop me a comment so I can explain and fix it because I have no clue ever if anything I say makes sense, but I will also be withholding info for the sake of plot for some things).  
> 4\. Yes, Katara and Sokka are twins. It makes the whole college thing easier but also I love it and will not be taking criticism on it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapters will probably get longer after this one, but who knows really. I can hope, but I'm also very impatient and like to post things immediately, hence why this one is so short.

Sokka lets out a triumphant sigh of relief as he adjusts the last item to unpack – his trusty boomerang, balanced perfectly on his desk as decoration. It took him a while, but he’s _finally_ unpacked, and everything’s in perfect order.

His dad had left a few hours ago, after dropping him and Katara at their respective rooms, having taken them out for a final lunch as a family. Food in the Earth Kingdom is weird, Sokka had decided. There isn’t nearly enough meat, and far too many grains, and _no_ sea prunes to be seen, anywhere. He isn’t happy about leaving his favourite foods and simple life behind in the Water Tribe, and he was sad about saying goodbye to his dad, obviously. Sure, he’s hardly home anymore because he’s always off on ‘important solider business’ that Sokka 'isn’t old enough' to know about, which meant that normally it’s just he and Katara at home, but Sokka is still going to miss the few times his dad is home and they get to be a proper family.

Still, Sokka’s happy about being at college, even if it means being in the mild weathered and carb-y food filled Earth Kingdom. Ba Sing Se has the best college of anywhere, and neither Sokka nor Katara could turn down that opportunity when they were offered a place. He’s getting an _education_ and seeing the _world_ outside of the Southern and Northern Water Tribes. He knows Katara is just as excited, too, despite the same reluctance to leave home on top of her uncertainty around no longer being a mother all the time to him and half the tribe. Sokka knows she’ll have plenty of time to mother him still, though.

Sokka takes a step back, admiring his handiwork. He knows bringing boomerang might’ve been a bit excessive, at least Katara and his dad think so, but Sokka can’t take any risks. He needs to be able to defend Katara if necessary, and there’ll be Fire Nation people at the college and in Ba Sing Se. He can’t risk losing anyone else to them. Sokka hopes his dad didn’t notice the sword he snuck off the boat that’s now hidden under his bed.

The other half of the room is still empty, contrasting deeply with Sokka’s half. His roommate is still yet to show up. Sokka hopes he’ll be nice.

Without warning, the door slams open behind him, bouncing on its hinges and making Sokka flinch at the thought of the dent that could leave in the wall.

“Sorry,” Katara says, noticing.

Sokka shrugs it off, noticing Katara's frustration immediately. “What’s wrong?”

Katara sighs, throwing herself onto Sokka’s perfectly made bed. Sokka chooses to let it go. “My roommate is _awful_.”

Sokka sits down next to her. “At least she exists,” he jokes. Katara isn’t impressed. “She can’t be that bad.”

“It’s been _hours_. Just _hours_. And the room is already looking like a buffalo-yak nest. I’m not exaggerating, Sokka. It’s _disgusting._ ”

Sokka laughs, grateful that he and Katara decided on the same college. He doesn’t think he could go without her for this long.

“Is she cute though?”

“NO! Sokka, gross! Don’t even _think_ about trying to do _anything_ with my roommate!”

He grins, enjoying teasing her. “I wouldn’t dream of it, not when I’m still oh-so-heartbroken over my dear-”

“You and Suki dated for all of five minutes and broke up as soon as you left for home, stop acting all lovelorn.”

Sokka winks at her. Neither of them touches on his more obvious reason to be lovelorn, and he’s glad for it. It’s a taboo topic in his family now, ever since he lost it every time it was brought up.

“Have you met your roommate yet?” Katara asks, sensing Sokka’s dip in mood. They both know exactly what he’s thinking about, but it stays wordless.

“Now who’s trying to sleep with who’s roommate?”

“Shut _up_ ,” she hits him over the head, and okay, yeah, he deserved that. “ _I_ haven’t only come to college to find attractive people to sleep with. I was just asking.”

“I’m offended you would _ever_ peg me as so shallow, Katara,” Sokka jokes, and gets an eyeroll in return. “He’s a no-show. But I’m not complaining. Having a whole room to myself for the first time in my life, now _that’s-_ ”

Sokka’s cut off by the door swinging open again, a kid barrelling in who _surely_ isn’t old enough to be here, just one small bag slung over his shoulder. Both Sokka and Katara’s eyes are drawn to the intricate tattoos up his arm and on his head.

“I’m Aang! You must be-” the kid, Aang, freezes halfway through speaking, his eyes glued to Katara. _Oh great_ , Sokka thinks, _he’s got the hots for my sister already._ “Uh, hi,” Aang says, smiling sheepishly at Katara.

“Hi,” Katara smiles back, oblivious, “sorry, I’m probably not supposed to be here. I’m Katara.”

Sokka waves at Aang. “I’m Sokka. Sorry about her, you’ll have to get used to her I’m afraid. She’s awful clingy. Can’t be left alone for a moment.”

“Just cause if I leave _you_ alone for more than a second, you’ll brain yourself on a piece of furniture.”

Sokka rolls his eyes, and Aang laughs. It’s light and airy, and impossibly infectious. He and Katara both find themselves laughing along.

“So…” Aang starts when the laughter dies out, “are you two…you know…together?”

No words can describe the sounds that come out of both Sokka and Katara. Screams of tortured anguish, mostly.

“No,” Sokka says when he finally finds words, “no, no, no, no, _no_. She’s my twin sister.”

“Oh. _Oh_.” Aang says, face relieved, “You guys look alike. I should’ve known. Wow. Sorry.”

They all end up laughing again, and Sokka is thankful for the easing of tension and light atmosphere. He already knows he’s going to enjoy having Aang as a roommate. At home, things are so often difficult and tense and he and Katara have far too much responsibility for their age. Finally, Sokka feels like he’s going to get to act his age.

Aang sits on his bed and starts unpacking the few things he’s brought. “So you guys are from one of the Water Tribes, right? Are you benders?”

Sokka sighs. “ _Katara_ is. I’m not.”

Katara laughs. “We’re from the Southern Water Tribe. Sokka’s still bitter that I’m the only one that got the bender genes.”

“It’s not _fair._ ”

Katara laughs. “Where are you from, Aang? Are you a bender?”

Sokka leans forward, interested. He’s never seen anyone that dresses like Aang or has tattoos like that. Admittedly, outside of the South Pole, he’s only ever met people from the North Pole and a few Earth Kingdom people from the one trip he was allowed to go on with his dad to Kyoshi Island.

“I’m an airbender!” Aang says, beaming with obvious pride.

Katara and Sokka both really lean forward then, eyes wide. “No way,” Katara says, “I’ve never met an airbender.”

“That’s so _cool_ ,” Sokka says at the same time, “show us some airbending!”

“Uh…” Aang looks around the room, eyes landing on Sokka’s desk.

Sokka opens his mouth to protest, but it’s too late- his boomerang has been lifted into the air, hovering a few feet above the desk before it clatters back down, knocking everything over in the process.

“But- but-”

Katara elbows Sokka to shut him up. “That’s _amazing_ , Aang. We’ve never met an airbender. We’ve barely even left the South Pole.”

“ _I’ve_ left the South Pole.”

“Yeah, so have I hog-monkey brain, it’s an exaggeration.”

Sokka crosses his arms and frowns. Katara rolls her eyes.

“So, Katara,” Aang beams, “where are you staying?”

“I’m just in the girl’s dorm the other side of the street. I would show you guys, but it’s a bull-pigsty right now, my roommate is the worst.”

“I don’t mind!” Aang says, “I’d love to see it!”

“Yeah, Katara, why don’t you show us?” Sokka grins, “Maybe your roommate even knows a party we could go to.”

Katara glares at him. “Don’t even _think_ about flirting with my roommate, or your dead and so is boomerang.”

“You wouldn’t _dare_.”

“No flirting.”

“As if you can talk.”

Katara frowns then, confused, but Aang goes bright red.

“Okay,” Katara says with a sigh, “let’s go, then, if you guys insist. But we’re not going to a party tonight, and that's final.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone know who Katara's roommate is? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After this chapter, I'll probably be updating around once a week, but I couldn't resist getting this one up early.

Sokka’s surprised when he finds out that Katara’s right. Her room really is a mess, most of it being contained to one side, but with some definite spill-over onto Katara’s side. It makes Sokka’s skin crawl and he’s sure he’d go insane if he had to stay here. He hopes Aang is tidy.

Katara’s roommate is sat at her desk, which looks like it’s covered in dirt. Sokka doesn’t even ask.

“ _Two_ guests already, Katara? You’re popular,” the girl says, not turning away from her dirt.

Katara sighs. “Toph, this is my brother, Sokka, and his roommate Aang. Guys, this is Toph.”

“Who’s who?”

“Sokka is the tall one.”

Sokka raises his eyebrows at _that_. Katara has never once described him as something so complimentary.

“He _is_ tall,” Toph says, still not having turned around.

“How-” Sokka starts, but then Toph turns and stands up, and he sees her cloudy eyes that look at nowhere in particular. _Oh._ But that still doesn’t explain how she knows he’s tall.

Toph walks up and stops maybe a foot away from Sokka, not even coming up to his shoulders.

“How do you know I’m tall?” Sokka asks. “You’re blind, right?”

“I’m surprised you didn’t do your sisters spluttering-and-stuttering routine when she realised.”

Katara crosses her arms, huffing just a little, “Me and Sokka are very different people.”

“And I can feel that you’re tall,” Toph gestures down to her bare feet, “through the earth.”

Aang gasps, stepping closer, “You’re an earthbender.”

“And you’ve got the lightest footing I’ve ever felt.”

“I’m an airbender.”

“Okay, twinkle toes.”

Sokka groans. “Why is _everyone_ a bender but me?”

Katara pats him on the shoulder.

“Shut up Katara.”

Toph smiles. “I like him,” she tells Katara.

Sokka throws a cocky grin in Katara’s direction, which she returns with a warning look. “What’s with the dirt?” Sokka asks.

Toph shrugs, stepping aside so the others can see the desk, “Just figuring out campus.” And she’s not lying. Intricately moulded out of the dirt is a perfectly to-scale model of campus. Sokka's impressed. More than impressed, really.

Sokka and Aang are both silent in their amazement. Katara, on the other hand, groans from what could easily be a severe, life-threatening injury. “There’s so much _soil_. Please tell me you’ll clean that up.”

Toph waves her off, sitting back at her desk. Everyone else settles down; Sokka and Katara sprawled across her bed, and Aang cross-legged on the clean part of the floor.

“What’s everyone studying?” Toph asks.

“Engineering,” Sokka says.

“Me too,” Toph says, “My parents wanted me to do some stupid useless degree that wouldn’t ‘challenge’ me, but they could still be elitist about me having a degree. They _think_ I’m doing Earth Kingdom studies.”

Sokka laughs, “My dad is making me take some political science classes because ‘you’re in line to be Chief, it’s important to study these things, Sokka, blah blah blah’.”

“Woah, you’re gonna be Chief of your tribe?” Aang asks, clearly in awe.

“One day,” Sokka says, not really wanting to think about a future where his father isn’t around to be Chief and he has to take on that kind of responsibility.

“Monk Gyatso has made me take political science, too. I don’t know why, but he said it’s important. But I’ve got classes in just about everything else, too. He at least let me do that.”

“I took political science just ‘cause I think it’s interesting,” Katara says.

“And _that’s_ why Katara would be a better Chief than I ever would,” Sokka says, “such a shame that she’s so young, practically a child.”

“Three minutes difference, Sokka, three minutes.”

Sokka grins and ducks out of range of Katara’s hit.

They drift into a comfortable conversation, all getting to know one another. It blows Sokka’s mind how wildly different all their lives are. He and Katara were mostly raised by their grandmother, taking on a lot of responsibilities as the oldest kids in the tribe, while Aang was raised by monks and became an expert airbender at a young age, and Toph is from an obscenely rich family and barely got to leave their house because of their paranoia over her blindness. She said she’s lucky they didn’t send an escort with her to college. His dad wasn't wrong in saying that you meet a lot of different people at college.

“So,” Sokka says, trying to break up an air of tension following Katara forcing Toph to clear up her dirt, “does anyone know any parties tonight we can go to? Let’s meet some people.”

“ _No._ Not happening, it’s our first night,” Katara says, "and we have classes tomorrow."

“I know a party,” Toph says, “well, I know one of my parents’ friends who goes here, who will probably be throwing a party.”

Sokka shrugs, “Sounds good to me.”

“I’m always happy to meet new people,” Aang says.

They all look to Katara. She sighs.

“Fine.”

“It’s our first night here, should we _really_ be going to a party?” Katara questions, again, frowning when they reach the house of the party, bursting with people and music.

“Please, Katara, you can’t be this boring,” Toph says, walking ahead without them. She stops after a few steps. “Hello? Are you gonna let the blind girl get lost in a party?”

She crosses her arms, waiting until Aang runs ahead and joins her. “As if you could ever get lost,” he says.

Sokka loops his arm through Katara’s, pulling her forward. “Stop worrying. We’re not at home anymore. You’ve got no one to be responsible for but yourself.”

Katara sighs. “I’ve got you. And Toph. And Aang doesn’t seem to have the _best_ judgement, either.”

“Katara. We’re all adults. You only need to think about yourself. At least for tonight, please.”

She looks at him, still uncertain. Sokka takes that as a cue to start dragging her with more force towards the door. Katara relents, speeding up to catch up with Aang and Toph.

“If any of you get in trouble tonight, I swear…”

Sokka realises too late that he probably shouldn’t have drunk so much. He’s sat on a chair in the kitchen, who knows how many drinks or hours into the party, the entire world spinning around him. Toph is next to him, head on the table. Sokka can only assume her head is spinning just as much. Can your head spin when you’re blind? Sokka decides it’s best not to ask.

“I don’t want to say my parents were right about drinking, but maybe I shouldn’t have been so quick to prove them wrong,” she mutters into the wood.

“They didn’t let you drink?”

“They didn’t let me do anything. They always thought I was too fragile.”

Sokka rolls his eyes. “Complete bullshit. You’re the least fragile person I’ve met and I haven’t even known you a day.”

He sees a hint of a smile through Toph’s hair.

Sokka looks back through to the living room, where most of the party is situated, wondering if Katara and Aang are ready to leave yet. Lounging across one of the sofas is quite possibly one of the most attractive guys Sokka has ever seen. He’s pretty sure his brain short-circuits for a moment. He can only see one side of his face, but he’s got one hell of a profile, slightly obscured by shaggy black hair. He’s lying next to a girl with long black hair. They both look as bored as one another, aside from occasional smiles and whispers between them. Sokka hopes, just a little bit, that they’re not together.

“Hey, Toph, do you know who that guy is?” he asks, not tearing his eyes away from the guys face.

“Sokka,” Toph says, lifting her head back up, “what guy?”

“Oh, right, shit. Sorry. Um-”

“What’s he wearing?”

Sokka just about manages to tear his eyes away from the guys face, and that’s when it all goes wrong. He’s in head-to-toe red, with a lot of gold. _Fire Nation._ He repeats this to Toph, with more details.

“He sounds royal, or at least, like, rich and powerful,” she says, "maybe the kid of some high-up official."

“Tui, Fire Nation _and_ royal?”

“You don’t like the Fire Nation?”

“It’s a long story.”

Toph shrugs going back to her table. Sokka goes back to not staring at the guy. He’s _Fire Nation_. He watches as a frown crosses the guys face, then he jumps up and runs out of Sokka’s line of sight. He leans forward in his chair, trying to see where this mystery guy has run off to so suddenly, when he hears voices, loud and angry and distinctively feminine. He tries to pick out the words to understand what’s going on, but instead picks out a voice - Katara.

Sokka jumps up, grabbing and dragging Toph behind him. She stumbles and complains, but he persists. They get into the room just in time to see Katara and a Fire Nation girl in similar fancy clothes stood face-to-face yelling at one another, with hot guy himself stepping in between them. He puts a hand on the girl’s shoulder, pushing her back. The girl lifts up her hand and a flame ignites in it. Sokka lets go of Toph, running forward, but he’s already far too late. Katara, the idiot, pulls some water out of someone’s cup and steps forward. Hot guy shoves her away with more force than necessary, sending her tumbling back with a scream.

Sokka runs over to her. She’s sprawled across the floor, arm bent unnaturally where she landed on it. Sokka sees red.

Without thinking, he turns and grabs the guy by his shirt. He has a brief moment, barely even a millisecond of hesitation as he processes how close he’s stood to this guy. The way he towers over Sokka, the slightly floral, smoky smell to him. And, most importantly, the scar taking up half his face and trailing below his collar. Sokka wishes he were less attracted to him.

Without any more hesitation, Sokka punches him straight in his perfect face, letting go of him in time for him to go stumbling back and land on his ass. Good, Sokka thinks.

He turns back to Katara, a circle now forming around her with Aang and Toph the only ones brave enough to get close. Sokka picks up Katara, careful not to jolt her arm, and carries her through the room. Hot guy, now back on his feet, tries to intercept. Toph easily blocks his movement without any prompting, and Sokka feels a wave of appreciation and amazement towards her.

“Stay the fuck away from my sister,” Sokka spits at him, leaving with Aang, Toph, and a bunch of shocked stares in his wake.

As soon as they get outside, Sokka stops.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, my arm is just- I need to- is there any water nearby?”

“Toph?” Sokka asks, hoping her modelling can be put to use.

“There’s a fountain, I think, not far.” Toph takes the lead straight away, and they all trail behind, Aang occasionally jumping – _far_ too high for a reasonable human being – to look and see how far away the fountain is.

“Wait, why do we need water?” Aang questions after a while.

“I can heal it with my waterbending.”

“You’re a _healer_ , too? That’s awesome!”

It doesn’t take long for the tension to return.

As soon as they get to the fountain, Sokka doesn’t think twice before climbing straight into it and sitting Katara down in the water that’s luckily deep enough to easily submerge her arm. She uses her other hand to bend the water and it starts to glow faintly around the break. They all – well, Aang and Sokka – watch intently, waiting for something to happen. Katara lets out a small yelp of pain and the water splashes back, fading to its regular colour.

“What happened?” Sokka asks.

“I can’t do it,” Katara says, “it’s…I think it needs to be set in place before I can heal it.” She sighs. “I think I’ll need a doctor.”

“I’m always down to reset a bone,” Toph offers, cracking her knuckles. She stops with a glare from Sokka.

Sokka looks to Aang helplessly.

“I’ll find help,” Aang says. He starts to head off but comes back and grabs Toph quickly.

“Hey- what?”

Aang elbows her, gesturing at Sokka and Katara both soaked and sat in the fountain, whispering to one another. Toph relents and follows Aang.

“I’ll kill him,” Sokka is telling her, helping her support her arm, “I swear, I’ll do it.”

“Sokka, no. It wasn’t his fault.”

“It _was_ , I saw him. Crystal clear.” And he’s _still_ seeing him, over and over, that moment is replaying in his head – Katara falling too quickly and too far away from him to catch her, the horrid _snap_ of bone audible over the music, and the look on hot guy’s stupid face.

“It was that other girl, more than anything. She was starting the fight, he was just trying to separate us.”

“What _happened_? Why-?”

Katara sighs. “I had been showing Aang some waterbending, he left for a moment to get me a drink, and this girl just approaches me and starts saying all these horrible things.”

“Like?”

“Sokka…”

Sokka knows it’s bad if she’s holding it back from him, knows it’ll only make him angrier.

“Please, Katara.”

“She clearly didn’t like that I’m a waterbender. She said…I don’t know. All kinds of things. That we’re savages. That I don’t deserve to be here. That our ‘species’ should be wiped out.”

Sokka clenches his teeth, every muscle fighting the urge to run back to that party.

“This was a mistake, Katara. We _knew_ there’d be Fire Nation here.”

“We can’t let them get in the way of our lives, our education. That’s exactly what they want.”

“They’re _dangerous_ , though. Look at this-” He gestures down at her broken arm.

“It was an accident.”

“And the girl was _firebending_.”

“And I can waterbend, Sokka. I can defend myself.”

“You shouldn’t _have to_. Katara…Toph said, judging by the way they’re dressed, they’re most likely the kids of some high up military or government official. They could be…you know who’s kids they could be. Judging by what she was saying, it seems pretty likely.”

“He’s _gone_ , Sokka. He died in his stupid invasion and, La, he’s never coming back from that.”

“We don’t know. We didn’t see. And he didn’t act alone. Plus, he still would’ve had, what, sixteen years to indoctrinate his kids? What if they live out his legacy?”

Katara sighs. “We won’t let them beat us and ruin this opportunity for us. She’s just some stupid rich kid that’s never left the Fire Nation and met anyone that doesn’t look or bend like her.”

“I don’t like it, Katara.”

“You don’t have to; you’ve just got to ignore them and get your education.”

Sokka sighs, knowing she’s right but still struggling to accept it. He’s been burned too many times by the Fire Nation to forgive so easily, and it makes it so much harder that anyone outside of the Water Tribes sees them as perfectly innocent. Sokka looks up at the moon, full and luminous in the dark sky, and sends up a silent prayer that these will be an easy few years and he’ll be able to avoid those Fire Nation kids.

Aang and Toph come back not much later, now armed with the knowledge of the nearest doctor and they all go marching off into the night. Sokka is cold and blindingly sober, wishing he could go back in time to listen to Katara before they went to the party.

The doctor is nice, if a bit sceptical about Katara’s healing ability. Sokka enjoys the cocky smile being wiped off his face. He still wraps her arm up to stabilise it and gives her some medicine to help with the pain, but at least she’s not in a cast and should be completely healed before too long. When they’re finally finished and back at the dorms, Sokka can barely say goodbye to her.

“Are you sure you’ll be fine? You can stay in our room if you want. I don’t mind sleeping on the floor,” Sokka offers. He already knew this first night would be hard enough as it is, after having shared a tiny room for their entire lives and never being far away from one another, but now she’s hurt and they’re so far apart, and if she’s in danger there’s nothing Sokka can do.

“I promise, I’ll be fine. I have Toph.”

Toph grins. “She has me. I won’t let anything happen; I’ll sleep with my feet face down all night.”

“Thank you, Toph. You’re the best.”

Katara rolls her eyes. “See you guys tomorrow,” she says, giving both Sokka and Aang a parting hug. Sokka tries not to see the blush high on Aang’s cheeks afterwards.

“Sokka,” Toph says with a nod, punching him on the arm, “twinkle toes,” she adds, giving Aang the same treatment.

They cross the street and duck into their respective dorms, and Sokka already feels immediately on edge as he and Aang head up to their room.

“Ugh. I’m really gonna sleep well tonight.”

“Are you sure you’ll be fine, being apart from Katara?”

Sokka shrugs. “I don’t know. We’re from a tiny tribe, you know? I’ve never been further than yelling distance from her, our whole lives.”

Aang gives him a sympathetic smile as Sokka unlocks their door.

“Do you have any siblings?”

“No,” Aang says, “I didn’t have _anyone_ my age growing up. I was raised by Monk Gyatso, and all the other monks, but there were no other kids.”

“ _None?_ Weren’t there other airbenders being born?”

Aang shrugs. “I guess they were all just in the other temples.”

Sokka, upon seeing his bed ready and waiting for him, decides not to question it any further. He’s tired, it’s been a stressful day, and he’s not even going to try and pretend he knows anything about the Air Nomads.

After changing, the two of them crawl straight into bed, very ready to sleep. Sokka can feel the weight behind his eyes but sleep still doesn’t come.

“This place doesn’t sound right,” he says, eventually.

“Hmm?”

“It doesn’t sound like the South Pole. I miss the wind. And it’s so _warm_ in here.”

Sokka can hear Aang shifting in his bed, turning to face him. “I miss the wind, too. The temples are high up, they can get so windy. Especially at night. It helps you sleep, doesn’t it?”

“Exactly,” Sokka says, “this place doesn’t sound like home.”

“It will, eventually.”

It’s a bittersweet sentiment, but it does reassure him, just a bit. As he starts to drift off, Aang pipes up again.

“Hey, Sokka?”

“Mmm-hmm?”

“I’m glad we’re roommates.”

Sokka smiles. “Me too, Aang.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please share all your thoughts in the comments, I love to hear anything and everything!


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning, Sokka and Aang meet Katara and Toph down between their dorms to go for breakfast. Sokka tries to ignore the bandages on Katara’s arm and the way she winces if she moves it too much.

“Where do you want to eat?” Aang asks as they start to walk off campus.

“Somewhere with fish or seaweed, _please_ ,” Sokka begs. He’s missing food from home so much, already. Katara definitely catches him eyeing up some of the fish in a pond they walk past in someone’s garden. She elbows him to dissuade him. It doesn’t work particularly well.

They wander for a while, going further into the city and away from campus, all completely unfamiliar with the area.

“Hey, what about this place?” Katara says, stopping in front of a small tea shop. A sign hangs above the door with ‘The Jasmine Dragon’ written across it.

“A tea shop?” Sokka questions. Tea doesn’t sound like breakfast.

“Yeah but…look.” Katara points through the window, to a steaming bowl of noodles being served to one of the customers inside.

“Mmm,” Sokka says, unconsciously leaning forward, “they look _good_.”

Katara laughs, “Get your face off the glass, idiot.”

“I’m happy. I want some of those noodles,” Sokka says, consciously forcing himself away from the window, “everyone else?”

Aang nods, and Katara.

“I’ll take your word for it,” Toph says.

They duck into the shop, Sokka taking the lead. As soon as he steps inside, he’s hit with a wave of welcoming heat and the gorgeous smell of food. It’s the perfect combination of floral teas and hearty, warm foods. There’s no way the food here doesn’t taste amazing.

“Table for four?” Sokka says. Katara elbows him. “Please.”

The old man behind the counter looks up. “Take your pick,” he says, with a smile. “There are menus on the tables, let me know whenever you’re ready to order.”

They all take a seat at a table near the window.

“This place smells _amazing_ ,” Aang says, passing round the menus.

“The food _sounds_ even more amazing,” Sokka says after skimming over the menu. How is he even supposed to pick?

Katara and Aang make their decisions quickly and easily, both opting for the noodles, but Aang choosing the vegetarian ones. Sokka and Toph take longer. Sokka reads the menu out to Toph and they deliberate together over each thing. Toph chooses some dumplings, in the end. Sokka goes for noodles, dumplings, and some seaweed wraps to help with the homesickness. He silently hopes there’ll be enough to share some with Katara, because he knows she’ll need it whether she acknowledges it or not.

“Are you ready to order?” the old man asks them, after a wave from Aang.

“Yes, please,” Katara says, taking the lead, “could we have two noodles, two dumplings, and one vegetarian noodles?”

The old man nods, writing it down.

“And some seaweed wraps,” Sokka adds.

The old man smiles, adding that on. “I can’t promise they’ll be up to Water Tribe standard, but I will do my best.”

Katara smiles, “Thank you, we appreciate it.”

“Would any of you like tea with this?”

They all share a look, shrugging.

“Is it good?” Sokka asks, ignoring Katara’s glare.

“The best, if I do say so myself.”

“Then we’ll talk four cups of your best tea.”

The old man nods, “Wonderful.”

Katara rolls her eyes as soon as the man is gone. “Sokka, you’re lucky he’s a nice guy. You don’t just _ask_ people that kinda stuff.”

“What, I’m just asking.”

Katara sighs.

“So, uh…what classes does everyone have today?” Aang asks.

“I’ve just got an engineering class this morning, then some politics in the afternoon,” Sokka says.

“I’ve got engineering all day,” Toph says, “shocker. What time is your class, Sokka?”

Sokka lets out a huff of breath, trying desperately to picture the scroll with his classes written on it. “Like…10.30 maybe?”

“Nice, we’re in the same class.”

“Well, I’ve always wanted my own personal bodyguard.”

“Ha ha ha,” Katara says, “you’re in the same class as me and Aang in the afternoon, too.”

Sokka narrows his eyes. “How do you know?”

“Because Aang knows and we were having a conversation while you two were contemplating how easy it’d be to steal food from the street merchant.”

“Okay, but he was totally asking for it, not paying attention like that,” Sokka says, “all it would take is some strategically placed earthbending and some sneaking from me…”

“If I knocked the cart over with airbending, then it’s pretty much a free-for-all,” Aang adds with a grin, “it’s not our fault for picking food off the street.”

“ _Aang_ , not you too,” Katara says with a very tortured sigh.

Toph laughs, “We’ll convince you one day, Katara.”

“Or get yourselves arrested.”

“I’d like to see them try,” Toph says, cracking her knuckles, “I’ve been missing fighting.”

“Missing?” Katara asks, at the same time Sokka says, “When were you _fighting_?”

Toph laughs again, “I used to do some underground earthbending tournaments. I bet my competitors were over the moon when I left for college.”

“You were _winning_ these tournaments?” Katara asks.

“You haven’t seen me earthbend, yet. I was the reigning champion, several years in a row.”

Katara sighs. “You’re gonna give me a heart attack one day.”

“Maybe I should start a new earthbending tournament-”

They’re interrupted by the old man, then, carrying their food and tea over on a tray. “Here you go,” he says, putting down each of the dishes, “I hope you enjoy.”

They all beam at their food. It looks and smells incredible.

“We will, I promise,” Sokka says, and the man leaves them with a smile.

The food lasts barely more than a few minutes, as they all dig in and devour it quickly. Sokka doesn’t think he’s ever tasted anything so good. He’s _definitely_ coming back here again, and judging by the looks on everyone else’s faces, they all agree.

Once they’ve finished, Sokka goes up to the front counter to pay.

“You enjoyed your meal?”

“It was perfect,” Sokka says, truthfully, “I’ve never tasted anything better.”

The man lets out a short laugh, “Stop, you’ll make an old man blush. I hope I’ll see you again?”

“Every day,” Sokka promises, handing over the money.

The man laughs again, and it’s infectious like Aang’s, Sokka can’t help smiling with him.

“I presume the four of you are at Ba Sing Se University?”

Sokka nods, “We’ve just started, moved here yesterday.”

“Ahhh,” the man says, “my nephew just started, too. He works here, sometimes, so you might see him.”

Sokka smiles, nodding, trying to be polite. This guy seems lovely, but his nephew could be a complete weirdo.

“I’ll just get you some change,” the man says, ducking into the back. Sokka waits, and he doesn’t try to eavesdrop, but he’s stood right in front of the counter, it’s hard not to. Coming from the back room, he can hear two voices drifting out.

“There’s some students out there, you know,” the old man is saying, “just a bit younger than you. You should say hi.”

 _So, this is the nephew_ , Sokka thinks, his curiosity piqued. Is he weird or not? He leans forward, just a little, straining his ears to listen for more.

“Uncle, please,” a deep, raspy voice replies. Sokka didn’t expect _that_. His stomach flutters a little, and he squares his shoulders a bit, pretending the voice has no effect on him, “I don’t need any other friends.”

“You can’t just keep spending time with your sister and her friends.”

“Mai is my friend too,” the voice says.

“Sticking with Azula won’t change anything with your father.”

There’s silence then, followed by a sudden slamming door. A moment later, the man reappears, a smile fixed on his face, a little more forced than before.

“Here’s your change,” he says, “I hope to see you again soon.”

Sokka leaves, catching up with the others outside. He tries to join in their conversation as they all walk back to campus for class, but he keeps getting lost in his thoughts, listening to that voice over and over in his head. He hopes the nephew will be working tomorrow. Maybe Sokka should go to the Jasmine Dragon for lunch, too. Just in case.

Class with Toph is great, unsurprisingly. They both have the same passion for the class and enjoy all the work set. Sokka has to restrain Toph at one point, when it comes to the issue of reading and the professor isn’t the most accommodating person in the world. Sokka agrees with Toph that they’ll meet for study dates and he can read for her, so she doesn’t miss out on anything. He cheers her up with some vivid descriptions of just how bad the professor’s fashion sense is.

Toph goes straight off to her next class, and Sokka has a couple hours to spare until his afternoon class. He wanders around campus for a bit, getting to know the area. He settles on a bench near the fountain, trying not to remember how he’d spent the night before, sat in that fountain with Katara.

Loud voices draw his attention, and he looks up to see a group of four walking past the fountain. His blood turns cold as he recognises three of the four. They’re all dressed in red, and if that wasn’t enough to make his stomach turn, he recognises the sharp features of the girl that was arguing with Katara, and the annoyingly handsome features and prominent scar of the guy that pushed her, as well as the bored expression of the girl he’d been sat with before. Now, they were joined by a livelier girl, with a plait down her back and a lighter colour scheme in her clothes. Sokka feels the anger surge through him, remembering the bandages still wrapped round Katara’s arm, the way she avoided picking her tea up with her injured arm this morning.

To avoid confronting them and making matters worse, Sokka gets up and walks in the opposite direction, trying to put as much distance between them as possible. He finds himself wandering in the direction of the Jasmine Dragon, and soon he’s stood outside.

He steps inside and is surprised to find the shop empty.

“Sorry, I was just closing for a lunch break,” the man says from behind the counter, turning to look at Sokka. As soon as he sees him, his face lights up. “You’re back!” His smile disappears quickly, “What’s the matter?”

Sokka didn’t realise how obvious his emotions were on his face, or maybe this guy was unusually perceptive, but Sokka knew he couldn’t hide it any longer. He lets his resolve crumble, and all his emotions show through.

“Come, sit down-”

“Sokka.”

“Sokka,” the man repeats, “I’m Iroh, lovely to meet you again,” he smiles, “I’ll put some tea on, you can join me for my break.”

Sokka sits down at one of the tables and waits while Iroh makes up a pot of tea before joining him. He pours out two cups and hands one to Sokka.

“What’s the matter?”

“I don’t-” Sokka starts, not knowing where to begin. He takes a deep breath, knowing it’s weird to share this stuff with a stranger, but being unable to resist the kind look on Iroh’s face. “There was this party last night, and my sister – Katara, she was here this morning – was in an argument, and it started escalating, and the girl's friend stepped between them and pushed Katara away. She fell and broke her arm.”

“I’m sorry to hear that, I hope she’s okay.”

“She’s fine, really. She’s an amazing healer so she’s pretty much back to normal, it’s just a bit tender and weak still, but…” Sokka sighs, knowing he’s really getting into it now. “Our mother died when we were really young when our tribe was raided. Our tribe never really recovered from the raid, and our dad and all the other men were never home because they were out making sure we were safe. Me and my sister were the oldest kids in the tribe, so a lot of responsibility fell on us. I was the only solider left in the tribe, and I felt like I had to protect them all, especially Katara. I couldn’t protect our mother, so if anything happened to her…” Sokka takes a deep breath, “I couldn’t live without her, and moving here was terrifying, because I’d be apart from her for so often, and then on the _first_ night of us living here she gets hurt. I know she can defend herself, but I can’t help feeling responsible. And she’s always looked out for me, she filled the role of our mother, being apart from her is so much harder than I could’ve imagined.”

“That sounds difficult, I’m sorry about your mother. Sometimes it’s hard to give the people we love the freedom they need because it means they could get hurt, but if we don’t give them that freedom then they’ll never get to live their life. I told you about my nephew this morning, I’ve often struggled to give him the freedom he needs. He’s often misguided, and has been through lots of difficulties like you, but I know I have to let him make his own mistakes even if that means he gets hurt. The most important thing is being there for the people you love when they’ve gotten hurt and they need your support.”

Sokka nods, taking a sip of his tea. “You’re right. I know I need to give her her own space, and I can’t blame myself if she gets hurt, and I especially can’t go round punching whoever accidentally hurts her.”

Iroh laughs, “You punched the boy that pushed her?”

Sokka nods.

“In the face?”

Sokka nods again. Iroh gets a thoughtful look but doesn’t say any more. They finish the rest of their tea in silence, before Sokka realises the time.

“Tui and La, I’m going to be late for class.”

Iroh laughs again, “What class is it?”

“Introduction to politics,” Sokka says, with an ever-enthusiastic sigh, as he helps Iroh clear up the tea.

Iroh raises his eyebrows, “My nephew is in that class, maybe you two will meet.”

“If he’s as nice as you, I hope so.”

Iroh laughs, “He doesn’t quite have my temperament, but he’s good-hearted, especially for all he’s been through. I think you two would definitely get along.”

“What does he look like?”

Iroh shakes his head, “I won’t make it that easy for you. I’m not about to interfere in anything, if you two are meant to meet you will meet.”

“You’re a cryptic man,” Sokka says with a laugh, and Iroh joins in. “Thank you again for the tea, and all your help. I’ll try to stop worrying about Katara so much.”

“Don’t beat yourself up if you struggle, it’s normal to worry about those we love.”

Sokka nods, and the two say goodbye as Sokka ducks back out into the street and rushes back to campus to get to class in time.

Sokka just about makes it into his class on time, and bursts into the full lecture theatre to find at least a hundred pairs of eyes staring at him. _Great_ , Sokka thinks, _making a good first impression._ He spots Aang and Katara sat midway up the steps, but all the seats around them are full. The more Sokka looks around, the more he realises there are _no_ empty seats. _Even better_.

“Do take your time,” the professor says sarcastically from the front of the class, “there’s a seat at the front here,” he adds, gesturing to the single empty seat.

Sokka looks over to the seat, and locks eyes with none other than the hot Fire Nation boy himself. Sokka wishes he could melt into a puddle, right now, preferably. He skims the rest of the class quickly, but no, there really aren’t any other seats. Sokka walks over to the empty seat, noticing both the look of horror on hot guy’s face, and the deep, shining bruise ringing his un-scarred eye. He still looks gorgeous, completely unfairly.

He slumps into the empty seat next to him, again catching his smoky floral scent. He tries to ignore him as the class starts, feeling the guys eyes on him occasionally. He refuses to look at him.

Once the professor has summarised what they’ll cover over the semester, he moves onto assessment, and this is where it all goes wrong for Sokka.

“You’ll be assessed based off of a portfolio of work done week by week, which you’ll do in pairs,” the professor says. Sokka catches the eye of Katara across the room, “however, since none of you know each other yet, it’ll probably be easier for me to put you into your pairs.”

Sokka deflates at the thought of not working with Katara. He watches the professor count round the room putting people in pairs, and his heart sinks when he realises that he’s pairing up everyone that’s sat together. Sokka looks desperately to his other side, but he’s at the end of the row. There’s only one person he’s sat next to.

The professor continues round the room, and Sokka holds his breath as he makes his way over to his side of the room. Surely enough, he points at Sokka and the hot guy as a pair. So that’s it. An entire semester. Sokka can’t decide what the worst part of it is, because he’s still angry at him for hurting Katara, despite everything Iroh said, but he’s also immensely guilty over the dark bruise marring his perfect skin, and on top of all that he’s _Fire Nation_. He’s so deeply attracted to this guy, being around him for so long will be _torture_ , because he’s the enemy. Sokka knows he can’t trust the Fire Nation, especially not if Toph is right and this guy has come from some powerful family that probably want Sokka dead.

“Uh,” the hot guy says, clearly feeling the awkwardness too, “hi again. I’m Zuko.”

His voice is strangely familiar to Sokka, but he can’t quite place it. All he knows is it’s another annoyingly attractive thing about him. Sokka forces himself to look at Zuko, and he’s immediately floored. Their seats are close together, and Sokka really gets to take in his whole face. He’s drawn to his eyes, first. One perfectly golden eye, the other a clouded, pale blue. Sokka really can’t stop staring at them. But then he focuses, on the burn scar that’s probably a result of a firebending accident, and the gold that is inherently Fire Nation. The same gold he’s seen in the eyes of one man in particular, who destroyed his family and the people he loves. Sokka feels sick.

“Sokka,” he says, turning away from Zuko again to avoid getting distracted again.

“Listen, I’m sorr-”

“No,” Sokka interrupts, “don’t.”

Sokka gets up then, getting all the eyes in the room focusing on him. He knows there’s still a lot of time left in class, but unless he wants to start an argument or start crying in the middle of class, he needs to leave. Right now.

“Sokka-” Zuko says, but Sokka ignores him, already regretting giving him his name. He sees Katara hesitate, standing up to follow him, but he shakes his head at her, leaving the classroom with a slam of the door. Outside, he takes deep, heaving breaths. This is going to be a long semester.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is so so SO much later than I intended to upload it but i've been so swamped with deadlines lately that it's been hard to find the time. hopefully i'll be uploading at least once a week from now on, but we'll see.  
> anyway, enjoy a short filler zuko chapter because this is all i could manage to get done (but let me know in the comments if you enjoy so i know whether or not to do more zuko!!!)

It’s all Zuko can do not to slam his head into the desk in front of him after watching helplessly as the door slams behind Sokka. He feels like an idiot. Of course he’d still hate him, he hurt his sister and Azula was no doubt being an asshole to start all this mess. Zuko has to resist the urge to follow Sokka out the door. What can he even say? They’re complete strangers and Zuko has done nothing but hurt the people Sokka cares about. He settles further into his seat, accepting the hate he knows he deserves.

He struggles to pay attention for the rest of the lecture, and just about manages to get some notes on what they should actually be doing for their assessment. Mostly, he’s distracted by thoughts of how to find Sokka and make things better so they won’t both fail the entire semester. He doesn't come up with much that doesn't involve deep embarrassment or borderline stalking. Towards the end of the lecture, a girl at the back of the class answers a question. Zuko is hardly paying attention, but something about the girl's voice is familiar, so he looks up and is immediately sent into a spiral of shame with a brief flicker of hope at the bottom. He recognises the girl; it’s Sokka’s sister, the girl he pushed. Her arm is bandaged and Zuko feels a wave of self-hatred looking at it. _He_ did that. He's never caused much hurt to people beyond minor accidental injuries in fire bending training or Azula whenever they've gotten in fights, but that was always mostly her inflicting all the damage. It's never been anything serious, never anything needing _treatment_ , and they've all been people he's known well. Not innocent strangers. He looks away, unable to cope with the shame of it. More than anything, he's thinking about how his uncle would react knowing he'd hurt someone like that. He didn't tell him what happened at the party because he was afraid of his reaction, knowing he wouldn't be able to cope if he disappointed his uncle, too.

Zuko forces himself to look back at the girl. He needs to face his shame if he's going to have any kind of honour, besides, this could be his opportunity. She’ll be able to put him in contact with Sokka, and he’ll be able to apologise to her. Maybe he'll actually be able to fix this mess. He'll approach her at the end of class and say something. He'll fix this.

With every second that ticks by Zuko feels more nervous, having decided on his plan. He keeps glancing over at her, careful not to get caught. He’s going to screw this up, he knows it. He wishes he could talk to his uncle first, he’d know what to say to give a decent, worthwhile apology. Zuko will probably just end up stammering his way through a half-hearted apology that makes her hate him more.

The professor dismisses them, and Zuko thinks he might be sick. Does he have to do this? Maybe he could find a way to swap partners and just live with the fact that they hate him. A small voice in his head that sounds suspiciously like his uncle tells him that that isn’t the right thing to do. He knows its right, and he knows he’ll feel better for this, but getting to that point is _hard_.

He still hasn’t moved and Sokka’s sister is clearing her stuff up, ready to leave. Okay, Zuko has to go. _Now_. He still doesn’t. He swallows, nervous, watching her walk down the steps with her friend. If he waits for even a moment more she’ll be gone, and he doesn’t know when he’ll next see her. Okay, _now_.

Zuko forces his numb legs to stand, and he intercepts Sokka’s sister and her friend. They both stop with a face of confusion, overtaken with sudden, surprised recognition.

“Uh, hi,” Zuko says, sticking a hand up in an awkward wave. “You must be Zuko’s sister, I’m Sokka. No, sorry, I mean, I’m Zukka, you must be Soku’s sister. No, I-” Zuko sighs. “Sorry, let me start again. I’m Zuko, and I know you’re Sokka’s sister. From when we met, briefly, you know, when I…” he gestures to her arm, “yeah, uh, that. I just…I wanted to come over to say I’m sorry. For that. And for my sister, I don’t know what she said to you but she can be a real asshole sometimes. A lot of the time. But I shouldn’t have pushed you, and I’m really sorry, if there's anything I can do to-”

She smiles and puts a hand up to stop him, “Zuko, it's okay. I really appreciate you coming over here, and of course I accept your apology. I know it was an accident, these things happens."

A wave of relief passes over Zuko and he lets out a big sigh, "Thank you, I'm just an idiot sometimes. I'm really, _really_ sorry."

"Sokka might take more convincing," she says, "not because of me, I mean, of course he's annoyed that I got hurt, but he’s hurt me far worse just through his own idiocy. He just has some…personal prejudices, and he’ll use me getting hurt as an excuse to take them out on you. So, I’m sorry for him in advance.”

“Personal...prejudices?”

“Our family has…history with the Fire Nation. I’ll give him the option to explain it to you if he chooses.”

Zuko nods, his mind running through anything that could've gone on with a random Water Tribe family. What kind of things could his dad have been up to in the last seven years?

“I’m Katara, by the way,” she says, “and this is Aang.”

Zuko smiles, “It’s nice to meet you. Again. But, uh, properly, this time."

They both laugh gently, "you too."

"Oh, uh, could you pass on a message to Sokka, for me?” Zuko asks. With a nod and an encouraging look from Katara, he continues, “Could you tell him I’ll be in the library tomorrow morning, to do the work, if he wants to come? And tell him I’m sorry. Really sorry. I'll apologise again tomorrow, in person, but tell him I'm sorry. Please.”

“I’ll pass it on,” Katara says, “I can’t promise he’ll show up, but I’ll do my best to convince him.”

“Thank you, I really appreciate it.”

Zuko leaves with another awkward wave, feeling some of the weight off his shoulders from the conversation, but not much. Katara had forgiven him, and that made him feel a lot better about the entire situation, but it still doesn’t bode well for the rest of his semester if Sokka doesn’t, too.

Zuko has a few more classes, and he sulks through them, getting progressively more miserable as he thinks more and more about this horrible situation. He and Sokka could’ve been friends if it weren’t for this. And what did Katara even mean by _history_ with the Fire Nation? His father hadn’t let him into many meetings, and nothing much happened in any of them. Except that one time. But there wasn’t anything to do with either of the Water Tribes, at least that he could remember. Maybe Azula would know something? She’d actually been in the Fire Nation in the past seven years. Zuko tries to imagine getting information out of her and trying to have an important conversation but conjures nothing. It’d never work. If he showed that kind of weakness to Azula, she’d eat him up. She’d probably hunt down Sokka herself to use whatever knowledge she has against him, just to make things worse for Zuko.

But that starts Zuko on another train of thought. That maybe Katara was just being nice about Sokka’s ‘personal prejudices’ and she really just knows how much he hates him because of what happened at the party. Of _course_ it would be Zuko’s fault. Why would he think to blame his dad for something he’s got nothing to do with? It’s all his fault, and he’ll never be able to get Sokka to forgive him. And then he’ll fail the semester, and he’ll never get to go home.

He’s so lost in thought, that Zuko doesn’t even realise he’s heading home after his classes until he’s stood outside the Jasmine Dragon. He braces himself for his uncle’s optimism.

Zuko sneaks into the shop, trying to be as quiet and careful as possible. His uncle looks up and greets him with a smile. Mission unsuccessful.

“How was your first day?” he asks.

Zuko doesn’t respond, instead heading straight through to the kitchen.

“That bad, huh?” Iroh asks.

Zuko keeps ignoring him, going upstairs to their flat.

"Or are you still sulking over whatever it was last night?" Iroh calls out, soon followed by footsteps and him coming through the door to the flat.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

Iroh puts a pot of tea on while Zuko throws himself down onto the sofa. They co-exist in silence until Iroh hands Zuko a cup of tea and sits down next to him. Zuko softens.

“I just keep messing everything up.”

“I’m sure that’s not true.”

“This was supposed to be my chance to redeem myself, to prove myself a worthy successor. But I keep messing it all up because I stupidly got in Azula’s way."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Zuko doesn't, not really, he doesn't want to relive it over again. But he does want his uncle's advice, so it's one or the other. He sighs, slouching further into the seat. "I hurt someone at the party last night."

Iroh raises his eyebrows, but doesn't look surprised.

"Azula was in a fight with some girl, so I stepped in between them before it could escalate too much, but I pushed the girl too hard and broke her arm. Her brother is the boy that did this," he gestures to his black eye, "and today he was assigned as my partner for the rest of the semester in one of my classes."

Iroh laughs, a deep, belly laugh.

Zuko frowns. "It isn't funny."

"Oh I know, Prince Zuko," he sobers up and puts a hand on Zuko's shoulder, "I think the universe has a funny way of putting you exactly where you need to be to do the most good. Clearly, you need to make amends with this boy and here is your opportunity to."

"But he hates me."

"Hate is a strong word, Prince Zuko."

"It's true," Zuko sighs, then gets an idea, "did my father ever do anything to the Water Tribe?"

Iroh face closes over, unreadable. "Your father has done a lot that I don't know about."

"But is there anything you do know about? Any Water Tribe families that the Fire Nation could've done something to?"

"This is about the boy?"

"His sister said their family has history with the Fire Nation, that's why he hates me so much."

"You spoke to the girl you hurt? She forgave you?"

Zuko puts down his tea, untouched, and crosses his arms, "Yes, but she didn't sound hopeful about him."

"You've made a big step, and made amends with the person that was hurt from all this. I'm assuming that this boy has a past we can't even begin to understand. If you really want to be friends with this boy, it might be difficult to get past, but I have faith that you are able to do it."

"I don't think I'm capable of that."

"I disagree."

Zuko looks at Iroh for a minute, knowing he only means well, but only being increasingly infuriated by everything he says. “I’m going to bed.”

"Prince Zuko-"

“I’ll see you in the morning,” Zuko interrupts, storming out and slamming his bedroom door behind him. He collapses onto his bed, wishing he could start the last two days all over again. How could he have been so _stupid_ and ruined everything so easily?


	5. Chapter 5

Katara finds Sokka in his dorm room, curled up on his bed.

“You know, you didn’t have to be so dramatic about it,” she says, closing the door behind her. She smiles sadly when she sees him and joins him on the bed. “Are you alright?”

Sokka sighs, pushing himself upright. “I feel like an idiot.”

“You’re not an idiot,” Katara puts a hand on his shoulder. “Okay, sometimes you can be an idiot. But this is a bad situation. It’s not your fault.”

“I shouldn’t have reacted like that, it’s just…he has the same eyes as _Zhao_. They’re just Fire Nation eyes, I know, but I looked at them, and suddenly I was back in the Northern Tribe at the invasion with…” Sokka stops, knowing he can’t bear to say her name, “and I was a kid again seeing mum die. I didn’t know what to do.”

Katara moves her arm round Sokka, resting her chin on his head. “It’s hard, I know. It’s not fair.”

Sokka shakes his head. It’s not, and it never has been.

“But,” Katara continues, “it’s not Zuko’s fault. He didn’t choose to be born in the Fire Nation.”

Sokka lifts his head up to look at her, “You spoke to him?”

Katara nods. “He came up to me at the end of the class. He apologised to me; I’ve never seen anyone look more sorry. He asked me to pass the apology on to you, too. And tell you that he’s booking a table at the library for tomorrow morning to do your work, if you’re willing to.”

Sokka sighs, dreading the prospect of working with Zuko every week for the rest of the semester.

“Do I have to?”

“Listen, we can always swap, you and Aang can be partners and I’ll work with Zuko. I don’t mind. Or I’m sure Aang won’t mind working with him, if you want to work together.”

It’s a tempting offer, and Sokka imagines for a moment how much easier it would be to be working with Aang or Katara each week. But he knows he can’t just run away from his problems like that. If he’s going to be Chief one day, he can’t hide from an entire nation of people. Shouldn’t he be trying to build up the relationship between their two nations? Fix the problems? Sure, Zuko’s hardly the Fire Lord, but it’s a start. “No, no, it’s fine. I’ll manage. Thank you, though.”

Katara smiles, “Me and Aang are going to the library to get some work done, are you alright here?”

Sokka raises his eyebrows, “You two are getting close.”

Katara frowns, but Sokka doesn’t miss the blush colouring her cheeks. “Shut up. We just have a lot of classes together, that’s all.”

Sokka doesn’t push any further. He knows Aang is a good kid and they're just good friends. They both sit in silence for a while. Sokka’s thoughts start to drift, but then Katara interrupts them with-

“Aang is just nice, you know? He’s fun to hang out with. We’re friends.”

Sokka _was_ going to be the bigger person, but now Katara is asking for it.

“Just _friends_ , huh?” he teases, “I’ve never spent this much time with a _friend_ barely a few days after I met them.”

Katara elbows him, “You’ve never had any friends.”

Sokka elbows her back, “I have too.”

“Who? Gran Gran?” Katara teases, dodging Sokka’s attempted hit, “or me?” He manages to get a hit in this time, and from the combined force of Sokka’s hit and her dodging Katara ends up on the floor. She looks up at him with a pout. Sokka bursts into laughter while Katara brushes herself off.

“You know, I could ask Aang what he thinks. Whether he feels you’re just _friends_ or not.”

“Don’t you _dare_.”

“How come, Katara?” Sokka stands up, walking over to the window and peering out. “Is he downstairs?” He sticks his head out the window, now. “Oh, Aaaaaaang?”

Sokka gets a brief glimpse of Aang’s yellow and orange clothes moving round the corner before he’s hit with a sudden force in the back of the head. He has a moment of shock and confusion before he notices the wetness and the water now pouring down his back. Typical.

Sokka turns, face agape, but Katara’s already out the door, head only poking through.

“Glad to see you’re not sulking anymore!”

“Oh, don’t worry, I’m getting right back to it!” Sokka calls out behind her, getting a laugh and a slammed door in response. He stands there for a minute in his soaked clothes, contemplating changing. But then- the bed looks so comfortable. He’ll just lie down for a minute.

But a minute turns into a lot longer than a minute, while Sokka turns over the past few days’ events, overthinking and dreading the next morning. For a brief moment, he considers getting up to do some work. But then he falls asleep.

Sokka wakes up to a loud bang and opens his eyes to Toph’s mere inches away from his. He jumps up with a scream and Toph howls with laughter.

“I _wish_ I could’ve seen your face.” Sokka glares at her.

“You’re a creepy kid,” Sokka says when he finally manages to get his heart rate down to a reasonable pace.

“And you’re an idiot,” Toph retorts, sitting down on Sokka’s bed, keeping her feet firmly planted on the floor. “I heard you’ve been partnered with the guy you punched in the face. I bet _that’s_ made a great first impression.”

Sokka rolls his eyes, pulling himself into a sitting position. His clothes are creased and still damp in places. His hair is loose around his face and he doesn’t want to even _think_ about how insane it must look, half-damp, half-sleep dried. “Hey, he didn’t exactly make a good first impression either.”

“Yeah, yeah. So, is this the same guy you were lusting after before Katara decided to get in a fight?”

Sokka feels his cheeks flush a hot red and he’s very thankful Toph is blind.

Toph laughs, “You _so_ like him!”

“ _What?_ ”

“Don’t think I can’t feel your heartbeat pounding away just at the mention of him.”

“Ugh,” Sokka lies back down, slamming his head into the pillow, “I _don’t_. He’s Fire Nation.”

Toph shrugs, “You’re still attracted to him.”

Sokka’s cheeks burn hotter and his heart flutters. Toph laughs again, harshly.

“You’re terrible at hiding it.”

“He’s objectively attractive, okay! I might dislike the guy, but I can’t argue with that.”

“Whatever you say. I’ll be listening out for you guys kissing in the library tomorrow. Oh, speaking of kissing in the library, how do you feel about Katara and Aang?”

Sokka sits up. “Wait. What do you mean, Katara and Aang?” Sokka knows he was teasing Katara about this exact thing earlier, but he didn’t think he was _right_ about it. He can’t have been, could he? Katara doesn’t like _boys_ , Katara likes waterbending and throwing fish at Sokka’s head. There’s no way.

“I ran into them in the library on my way back from class. They’re _obsessed_ with one another. Katara was practically swooning over him, asking all about air nomad culture. And he was the same, asking all about her bending. It was embarrassing. I could _feel_ the eyes they were making at each other.”

“You think…what…they _like_ each other?”

“Of course, it’s _obvious._ ”

“No way. No _way._ You’re wrong.”

Toph puts a hand on Sokka’s arm. “Sokka, I’m telling you this because I’m your friend. Your sister has a crush on that bald monk.”

Sokka sighs and puts his head in his hands. “Why have you done this to me? I didn’t need to know this.”

“I’m just hoping they’ll get together soon so we don’t have to deal with them all giggly and crushing on one another.”

“Ughhhhh.”

“But then maybe they’ll be even _worse_ if they start dating. Kissing and holding hands _all. the. time._ ”

“Toph. You’ve ruined my life.”

Toph shrugs. “You better not get with that Fire Nation guy and leave me all alone.”

“Okay, Toph, _no_. No way. Not happening, ever, ever, ever.”

“Ha. We’ll see.”

Sokka gets up early for his meeting with Zuko, nerves making him restless. He contemplates going to the Jasmine Dragon for more of Iroh’s noodles and some words of encouragement, but he’s sure if he walks any further away from campus he’ll chicken out. So, he grabs some food on campus and makes his way to the library.

Inside is bustling with scholars and students talking, reading, and moving through the shelves. Immediately, Sokka feels more relaxed. Even _excited_. But that’s less about Zuko and more about the sheer amount of knowledge around him. Would Zuko mind if he’s a bit late so he could pick up some books? Probably. He should go straight there.

Sokka looks at the big sign with directions around the library. It points upstairs for study spaces, so he heads to the nearest set of stairs. He just about manages to keep his nerves in check with the comforting smell of books and parchment and the gentle hubbub around him. He scans the signs mounted on each bookcase as he walks past, subconsciously memorising the layout for later use. He’s so close, _so_ close to making it to the stairs when he gets caught on one sign. _Weapons Manufacturing._ Sokka stops in his tracks without a single decision. There were only two armourers in the Southern Water Tribe and Sokka’s sure they were both glad to see the back of him. As soon as he was old enough to string two words together, he was pestering them in every spare moment to watch their processes and techniques.

His feet move of their own accord to between the shelves, and Sokka runs his hands along the books, pulling out the first few that grab his attention. After years hanging around the armoury, Sokka could make bone spears, snow knives, whale-walrus teeth machetes, you name it, with his eyes closed. But _other nations’_ weapons? Sokka could only imagine.

Sokka’s not sure how long he spends hunched on the floor over piles and piles of books, going down a rabaroo hole of the different ways in which the nations use metal in their weaponry. A sudden darkness overshadowing the library breaks Sokka out of his stupor, and he sits up with a squint of confusion. His back aches from being on the floor so long. Through the windows, the sky has mostly clouded over and darkened with foreboding weather. That doesn’t look good. Neither does the _significantly higher_ sun in the sky. How _long_ has Sokka been sat here? Shit. _Zuko_.

Books fly everywhere in Sokka’s scramble to stand up. He hesitates, wanting to put them back nicely, but also not wanting to screw things up even more than he already has with Zuko. He grabs the most interesting book and shoves it into his bag, then runs for the stairs.

At the top of the stairs, it’s easy to spot Zuko sat at one of the tables next to a large window, papers scattered around him and a frown on his face. At the sight of him, all his nerves return in full force and his stomach starts doing somersaults. Sokka wishes he hadn’t eaten. _Why_ does he make him feel like this?

Zuko must feel Sokka’s gaze, because he looks up and his face immediately clouds over with discomfort. He smiles awkwardly as Sokka approaches. Sokka can’t help but feel guilty about the deepened bruise ringing his eye, now a dark, swollen purple.

“Hi,” Zuko says, giving him a small wave.

“Hi,” Sokka responds, sitting down. He tries to avoid meeting Zuko’s eyes. His bruise. His scar.

“Thanks for being my partner,” Zuko says, “wait, I mean, working today. I mean, meeting me here today. To do our work. As partners.” Zuko laughs awkwardly and rubs the back of his neck. “I just want to say I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt Katara, it was an accident. I just know what my sisters like and I didn’t want her to hurt anyone, so I just thought-”

“That was your sister?” Sokka looks up, and immediately meets Zuko’s eyes and feels a wave of nausea, not really seeing Zuko’s eyes, just seeing the gold. He looks down again but ends up looking at the red draped over Zuko’s body, and it just sends Sokka spiralling, anxiety trembling through his body. It takes a lot of conscious effort to remind himself he’s sat in the library right now, perfectly safe.

“Yeah, she is,” Zuko says, “she’s- We’re not exactly close. I’m sorry about her.”

“Yeah, well, she didn’t seem particularly sorry,” Sokka snaps. He immediately feels guilty, but one look at Zuko’s hands reminds him that he’s probably a firebender, and the danger he holds. Sokka hopes he’s a non-bender, but he knows that would be just too easy.

Zuko sighs, “I know, I-”

“It doesn’t matter,” Sokka interrupts again, knowing they could go in circles forever. They just need to do their work so Sokka can get out of there as soon as possible. “Let’s just work.”

Sokka pulls out his sparse notes from the lecture and looks down at the paper Zuko has scattered around him and realises he has no idea what any of it is, what their class was even about, let alone what they’re supposed to be _doing_ right now. His own notes are all but useless.

“Uh…you don’t happen to know _what_ the work is, do you?”

"Uh, yeah," Zuko says with a nod, not meeting Sokka’s eyes. He hands him a piece of parchment with some notes about the work scratched into it. He can’t help but notice the elegant scrawl compared to Sokka’s unintelligible scratchings. “I, uh, also copied out some notes for you. I didn’t want you to miss out on everything after you, uh, left,” Zuko says, head still ducked as he holds out some papers. Sokka’s sure he’s imagining the redness of Zuko’s cheeks shining through his hair.

“Oh,” Sokka doesn’t really have much more insightful to say. He’s been nothing but an asshole to Zuko and now Zuko’s being far nicer than he actually needs to be. Sokka feels like an idiot. “Thank you, you didn’t have to do that.”

Zuko looks up and smiles, cheeks still glowing. “It’s fine, I wanted to.”

Sokka takes the papers from Zuko, and just for a millisecond, their fingers brush. Sokka’s breath rushes out of his lungs and his heart nearly jumps out of his throat. Zuko’s skin is burning hot and it feels like a jolt of electricity passes between them. Neither of them says anything for a long moment.

“Uh, yeah,” Sokka says eventually, mouth full of cotton, “let’s work."

They do manage to get some work done. It’s difficult, and it’s awkward, but they make progress, even if Sokka is praying for this to end every second. He tries not to linger too long on whether his discomfort stems from everything that’s happened with Zuko over the past few days (plus, _Fire Nation_ ) or if it’s because of the strange, electric heaviness hanging in the air between them. It’s a tension, like any too-fast movement will prick it and Sokka doesn’t know _what_ will happen. Sokka tries to pretend it's the former.

As the morning stretches onwards, the sky darkens outside, clouds pouring in and filling the skies with a heavy darkness. Sokka hopes they’ll finish before the rain starts.

“I can barely see,” he complains, trying to read one of the books in front of them and struggling. Sokka glances at the unlit lantern on the table between them, and it all happens so fast after that. Zuko lifts his hand up and conjures a small flame, igniting the lantern in one fluid movement. Sokka flinches from the flames and sudden burst of light, sending his chair careening backwards so he and it land with a heavy thud on the floor. Sokka winces, his head throbbing from its connection with the floor.

In barely a second, Zuko is above him, reaching out a hand to help him up. Sokka pushes himself backwards and away from Zuko, eyes fixed on the hands that brought fire to life barely moments ago. Sokka gets up by himself, dodging all of Zuko’s attempts to help him.

“Don’t touch me,” Sokka says. He gathers his things together and shoves them haphazardly into his bag, ignoring the look of mingling shock and confusion painted across Zuko’s face.

“What did I do?” Zuko says, voice small.

Sokka just shakes his head, feeling guilty but knowing he can’t spend another minute in there. His entire body is shaking, and he struggles to get everything into his bag, dropping half of it in the process. Zuko is quick to pick it all up, handing it to Sokka. He takes it reluctantly and rushes down the stairs and out of the main door before Zuko can ask any more questions.

Outside, it’s pouring with rain, and Sokka’s clothes are plastered to his skin in seconds.

“Sokka!” Zuko calls out behind him, voice muffled through the downpour. Sokka keeps moving. Unfortunately for him, Zuko has longer legs and manages to catch up with him quickly. He grabs Sokka’s arm to stop him, and Sokka spins round, pushing his hand away.

“I’m sorry, I don’t-” Zuko says, “what did I do?”

“You’re Fire Nation, a firebender! Fire is just death, and destruction, and pain,” Sokka spits out. He balls his hands into fists to stop their shaking. He hates himself for doing this. He wishes he weren’t doing this. But…he keeps seeing that flame, over and over again. And it came from Zuko. “Just…stay away from me.”

“What is your _problem_? I haven’t done _anything_ to you!”

“ _Haven’t done anything_? Do I need to remind you what you did to my sister?”

“I’ve _talked_ to Katara-”

“ _Don’t_ use her name.”

“- _she_ has forgiven me. So _why_ can’t you? You’re not the one I hurt. And I got what was coming to me,” Zuko points at the bruise around his eye, “thanks, for that.”

Sokka squeezes his fists tighter. His feels sick with guilt over hurting Zuko, only amplified by the anger he’s feeling alongside it. Should he apologise? Even in the moment, he knows he’s being unfair. Of course, Zuko has had nothing to do with the history between the Fire Nation and the Water Tribes, he’d have just been a kid too, when it all happened.

“Listen…” Sokka says, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have hit you. That was stupid, it was an accident.”

Sokka looks up and Zuko gives him a small smile, but when he meets Zuko’s eyes, he sees the gold shining back at him, and he can no longer see Zuko’s face. Sokka heaves in a breath and stumbles backwards, away from him.

“Sokka-” Zuko reaches out a hand, trying to catch and support Sokka, but he dodges the movement.

“Please, don’t touch me.” Sokka regains his footing and sighs, sitting down on the nearest bench. After a moment’s hesitation, Zuko joins him, keeping his distance.

“How can I make things right between us?”

“You can’t,” Sokka says, feeling himself closing off again. The rain is sticking to him, soaking his clothes through. He’s really not dressed for the weather and he can feel the cold seeping through to his bones. He starts to shiver, desperately wanting to shuffle closer to the warmth radiating off of Zuko but being put off by the knowledge of _why_ Zuko is so warm.

“Are you cold?”

“I’m fine.”

“Kat- Your sister told me you and your family have history with the Fire Nation.”

Sokka scoffs. “That’s an understatement.”

“Can you tell me what happened?”

“As if you don’t already know.”

“I don’t, really. I’m not exactly up-to-date on Fire Nation happenings.”

“No, I know all about you, okay?” Sokka says, standing up. “My friend told me what your clothes mean, that you’re some rich kid from some important family. I wouldn’t be surprised if you sat in on military meetings yourself.”

Zuko tenses up, back ramrod straight. A hand slowly goes up to his face but drops before it gets there. “I never went to any meetings. You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“What, you were too busy galivanting with other important kids? I bet you’re even friends with the _princess._ ”

“What, you’re not going to accuse me of being best friends with the prince, too?” Zuko looks up at him and Sokka flinches from his blazing eye.

Sokka hesitates when he processes Zuko’s words, frowning. “Prince? What prince?”

“The prince of the Fire Nation. You know, the princess’s brother? Son of the Fire Lord? Heir to the throne?”

“I don’t know what Fire Nation you’ve been living in, but I’ve never heard of any prince.”

Zuko’s shoulders slump and he refuses to meet Sokka’s eyes. Suddenly, Sokka wants to comfort him, reassure him over spirits know what. “Right. I haven’t been to the Fire Nation in years, I must be mistaken.”

“You haven’t?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

They’re both silent for a long time, tension hanging in the air between them.

“Please tell me how I can fix this,” Zuko says, eventually.

Sokka starts to pace, back and forth. Zuko watches him from the bench. Every time Sokka glances over at him, he’s hit with a new wave of anxiety. This is a _Fire Nation_ citizen. An important, rich, powerful citizen no doubt. Sure, everything with Katara was an accident, but it only proves that the Fire Nation can’t be trusted. That they don’t care about the lives of the Water Tribe. Sokka has no idea what family Zuko has come from, who he could be related to. Who he could be the child of. Can he trust his motives? Zuko knows that Katara’s a waterbender, what if he tries to finish the job?

“Can I ask you something?” Sokka asks, stopping in front of Zuko.

“Anything.”

“What’s your father’s name?”

“My- my father?”

“Yes. You’re from some big, important family, so who’s your father?”

“I’m not, I’m really not. I’m just…a regular Fire Nation kid. I grew up on the mainland but moved to the Earth Kingdom a while ago. I haven’t seen my father in years, and my mother in even longer.”

“Is…” Sokka hesitates, afraid of the answer, “do you know anyone, or are _related_ to anyone, by the name of Zhao?”

Zuko frowns. “Zhao? The naval captain?”

Sokka tenses and looks away from Zuko. “I think he was an admiral, but yeah. That’s him.”

“I met him once, I think. Nothing more.”

“He’s hurt people I love. He destroyed my family.”

“I’m sorry, Sokka, I-” he stands up, and takes a hesitant step towards Sokka.

“Are you?” Sokka turns on him, anger refreshed with the memory of Zhao. “You’ve been living happily in the Earth Kingdom, while my tribe, my family, my _people_ have been struggling to survive. And it’s because of people like _you-_ ” Sokka pokes Zuko in the chest, “firebenders. I’m telling you, death and destruction.”

Zuko balls his fists together, smoke starting to emanate from them, “It’s not _like_ that. Fire is more than that, it’s…life, and- and passion, and- I don’t know. My uncle explains it better.”

Sokka sighs. “I’m sorry, Zuko. Maybe you’re a great guy. But I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to trust you. I’ve seen people hurt by the Fire Nation too many times, and I- I can’t. And look at you!” Sokka’s voice rises, he gestures to Zuko’s face, the scar marring half of it, “Even you’ve been hurt by the Fire Nation!”

There is perfect silence between them for a moment, Zuko’s face entirely empty. Then something breaks between them, the tension bursts.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about!”

Zuko takes a step towards Sokka, his hands raised and smoking. Zuko tries to shove Sokka backwards, but in his movement, flames erupt from his palms and fly towards Sokka, licking up his entire body. The heat suffocates him, and he stumbles backwards, landing ungracefully on the floor. The rain quickly dampens the small flames on his clothes, but Sokka can still feel the heat covering his entire body.

Zuko stands over him, frozen and horrified, but Sokka doesn’t see him. Sokka sees the ash falling from the sky, staining the snowy ground black. He sees the boats landing in his tribe. He sees his mothers body. He sees the Northern Tribe being devastated just as his had been. He sees the red, empty sky. He feels the warmth of her behind him when he uses his body as a shield to protect her. He feels the weight of her cold body in his arms.

Sokka is pulled back to reality when his lungs start to burn, and he has to suck in a large breath of wet, smoky air. His eyes slowly focus, and he sees Zuko kneeling in front of him.

“Sokka, I’m so sorry, I-”

Sokka flinches back from Zuko’s hands moving in front of him. “Please, just- leave me alone. Please.”

He just about manages to get to his feet, and as soon as he feels the solid ground underneath him, he’s running, sprinting. He doesn’t know where he’s going, but he knows he needs to get far, far away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Zhao wasn't involved in the southern raiders but for the sake of story he is now


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me?? uploading two chapters in close succession??? it's more likely than you'd think  
> yes, i'm procrastinating doing work so don't be surprised if i'm uploading again v soon

Sokka ends up outside the dorms but doesn’t go in straight away. He paces outside, thoughts speeding and unreadable. He’s trying to get them in order, to process what happened, to think about it in a logical way. But as soon as he tries, he feels the burning flames against his skin and panic grips him tight.

After a while of pacing back and forth in front of the door, he starts to walk again. He doesn’t know if anyone will be in his room, but he doesn’t think he can face any of them at the moment. He needs some time alone, to think, even if he is getting more soaked and freezing by the minute.

He doesn’t pay attention to his surroundings, just focuses on the feeling of the ground underneath his feet, the cold against his skin. He’s in Ba Sing Se. He’s an adult, at university with Katara. His mother died nearly ten years ago and there’s nothing he can do about that. His father is safe, his sister is safe. His new friends are safe. He’s safe from the Fire Nation, they won’t hurt him here. Sokka looks up to the sky, wishing he could see the moon, needing some reassurance that she’s there, too.

Sokka stops outside the Jasmine Dragon without even realising that’s where he’d been walking. He’s still pretty unfamiliar with Ba Sing Se beyond the campus and the route to the tea shop, so it makes sense. He should go inside, warm up with some tea. Maybe Iroh can help him sort out the mess in his head. Sokka peers in the window, reaching for the door handle, and freezes. Inside, Iroh is stood behind the counter, making tea. The other side of the counter is a familiar figure; tall, broad, shaggy dark hair. Sokka’s eyes are misleading him. There’s no way. But then, the figure turns ever-so-slightly to the side, and Sokka sees the unmistakable scar on his cheek and neck. _Zuko._ Sokka’s blood turns cold. He keeps watching, unable to turn away. Zuko looks like he’s yelling at Iroh, angry and upset. Of _course,_ he’s the kind of guy that’s rude to servers. Sokka’s tempted to go inside and interrupt, but Iroh seems unbothered. He can handle himself, Sokka’s sure.

He starts walking again, making his way back home. The rain starts to ease up, only making Sokka colder when the water starts to evaporate off his bare arms. When he gets to the dorm, he hesitates again. He doesn’t want to have to explain himself; explain why he’s soaked through to the bone, why his clothes are singed, why he’s been gone so long. He might be able to face talking to Katara because she knows what it’s like. She knows the feeling of fear at seeing Fire Nation people and firebenders, she knows how those memories can come out of nowhere and pull the ground out from underneath you. He doesn’t think he could explain it to Aang or Toph though, and in all likelihood if Katara’s there, so are they.

Sokka sits down next to the door, resting his back against the wall, using the hardness of it to ground himself. He feels numb, more than anything, and it’s so easy to just sit there without thinking, letting his eyes drift shut and mind clear, finally at peace.

“Sokka?” Katara’s voice wakes him, along with her shaking his shoulder.

He opens his eyes, squinting at the sun, now low in the sky. “Katara?”

“What are you doing out here?” She’s knelt in front of him, Aang stood behind her looking on with worry, Toph stood to the side facing away.

“Uh…” Sokka’s brain is still heavy with the fog of sleep, and it takes a minute for the wheels to start turning and the spiderwebs to clear out. Why _is_ he out here?

“You’re _soaked_ ,” Katara says, “and freezing, and your clothes are all singed. What happened?”

It all comes flooding back, and Sokka feels his cheeks flush with shame. The argument with Zuko, provoking him. Running away from him. Walking around Ba Sing Se for who knows how long in the rain.

“It’s a long story,” Sokka says, his voice hoarse from sleep and the cold.

Katara sighs, “Come on,” she says, helping him up, “get inside.”

Inside, Katara makes Sokka and Toph wait outside the bathroom while she and Aang grab towels. Sokka would much rather just crawl into bed right now, wet clothes and all, but Katara has insisted Sokka needs to take a bath to warm up from the rain so he doesn’t get sick, and he’s not about to start arguing with her.

He and Toph stand in silence, Sokka shivering and dripping all over the floor.

“Are you alright water boy?” Toph breaks the silence, voice sincere and heartfelt.

“I’ve just been an idiot.”

“Screwed things up with your boyfriend?”

“Something like that.”

Katara and Aang round the corner, the biggest, fluffiest towel they have bundled up in Aang’s arms. Katara takes the towel, whispers something to Aang, and he and Toph disappear.

“In,” Katara says, using her head to point at the bathroom.

“But-”

“ _In._ ”

Sokka sighs and steps inside. Katara follows. She sets the towel on the side and starts heating up the water. Sokka watches, shivering, as she waterbends the heated water into the bathtub until it’s steaming and full.

“Get in,” she says.

Sokka steps forward but hesitates ever so slightly.

Katara sighs, “I’ll turn around.”

She does, and Sokka undresses quickly, his clothes hitting the floor with a wet slap.

“Pass them over here,” Katara says. Sokka throws them across to her and slips into the bath. The sudden heat makes his arms and legs tingle painfully as the heat seeps through his skin and warms up the coldest areas. Once he’s settled in, Katara sits down, back against the bath and facing away, leaving Sokka his privacy.

“Do you want to talk about it?” she asks, slowly bending the water out of his clothes and dumping it in the bucket.

“I don’t know,” Sokka answers honestly.

Katara stays silent for the while, nothing but the gentle movement of water filling the room. When she finishes drying his clothes, she folds them up and puts them on the floor. He can see her fingering the burn marks on the front of his shirt. He knows what she’s thinking. The stiffness of her spine, the set line of her jaw. He can read her like a book.

“Did he hurt you?”

Sokka lets out a long breath, sinking deeper into the water until he’s almost fully submerged. The heat works out the tension in his shoulders slowly. “No,” he says, “it was my fault. I was being an asshole, and he firebended at me, some of it caught on my clothes. The rain put it out.”

Katara breathes a sigh of relief, then laughs, just gently. “I would’ve killed him, you know.”

Sokka laughs too, a light breath, the tension easing up just a little more. “I know.”

Katara turns slightly, so she can see Sokka’s face. “You guys fought?”

“Yeah,” Sokka says, dipping his head, feeling the shame burning bright under his skin again. “I feel stupid, but every time I’m near him, I just lose control. Even though he’s probably a good guy, I just…he terrifies me.”

Katara smiles sadly, reaching up and taking Sokka’s hand. “I know. I felt the same with that girl at the party. I just think about mum, and…”

“I know.”

They both sigh, and Katara rests her forehead against the side of the bath. “It’s hard, isn’t it?”

“So hard.”

“What are you going to do? About the class work?”

Sokka sighs. That’s the really hard part. He can’t fail this semester; he can’t let his dad down like that. “I think I might talk to the professor, see if I can swap partners.”

“My offer still stands,” Katara says, “we could be partners, Aang won’t mind working with Zuko.”

Sokka smiles, just a little, “That’s not _quite_ the same offer as before.”

Katara rolls her eyes, “Okay, Mr. Perceptive, good job,” Katara smiles drops, “I don’t really want to be thinking about that day every week, either.”

“I know, thank you.”

They drift back into a comfortable silence, Katara gently running a thumb over the skin of Sokka's hand. After a while, a shiver runs down Sokka’s spine, the water starting to cool down quickly. “Okay, I think I’m done.”

Katara stands up and holds a towel out for Sokka, being very theatrical and obvious about averting her eyes. Sokka rolls his eyes behind her back, but still wraps up in the towel quickly.

“Okay, I’m decent.”

“Good, now you’re going to bed.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Back in his room, Sokka is now bundled in all the layers he owns and under dozens of blankets, but still won’t stop shivering. He’s sure Katara’s eyes flashed red when she felt the burning heat of his forehead and realised that he’d gotten sick.

“Hey,” Katara whispers, sticking her head back in the door and coming inside slowly, careful not to disturb a meditating Aang the other side of the room, “I’ve got you tea.”

“Thank you,” Sokka whispers back, taking the small cup and feeling the warmth bring delicious heat back into his fingers. He drinks it quickly under the watchful eye of Katara, then settles back into bed. She sits next to his bed, a silent sentry. It isn’t long before he drifts off, dreams taking him far away from the horrors of the day.

Sokka wakes up burning hot, entire body drenched in sweat. He fights with his layers and blankets, managing to push them off of him and strip down to the bare essentials. There’s a cup of water sat on his desk, too far away from his bed to reach it. He swallows, his throat sandpaper dry. The water desperately calls out his name, and Sokka groans at the thought of getting up.

With a sigh, he swings his legs out of bed, very nearly stepping on Katara. She’s curled up on the floor next to his bed, fast asleep. He rolls his eyes at her. What a martyr. Slowly and gently so as not to disturb her, he lifts her up her sleeping form and lays her on his bed, covering her with a couple blankets. He holds his breath, waiting for her to wake up and berate him for moving her, but she doesn’t stir. She _must_ be tired.

Sokka returns to his mission, creeping carefully across the floor to the water. He reaches it safely and downs the whole thing in one. It barely touches his thirst.

“AH!”

Sokka jumps a mile, his body going into fight or flight, heart pounding and searching for the danger. Instead, he sees Aang, sat up in bed and panting hard, eyes wide.

“Everything okay?” Sokka whispers, throwing a quick glance to check Katara’s still asleep.

“Yeah,” Aang says, relaxing again, “just a nightmare, it’s nothing.”

“From my experience,” Sokka says, walking lightly back to his bed and sitting on the floor next to it, “nightmares are never just nothing. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I don’t know, I just keep having all this weird stuff happening to me.”

“Like what?”

“Like…every time I try to meditate, I’m finding it _impossible_. I normally never have any problems; I’ve been meditating my whole life. But now every time I try to clear my mind, it’s like there’s someone _there_ , trying to contact me or something.”

“Woah, weird.”

“And now they’re in my dreams, too. Saying stuff about how I need to fulfil my duty and recognise my destiny.”

“Okay, maybe you’ve been meditating a little _too_ hard.”

“But that’s it, I’m not doing _anything_ different, I don’t know where it’s come from. It’s not just one person, either. All kinds of people.”

“Do you recognise them?”

“Not at _all_. They’re from all different nations. There’s this one Fire Nation guy, _really_ old looking. And a woman from the Earth Kingdom, with this heavy makeup that-”

“Wait, makeup? What kind of makeup?”

“Like, a white face with big red streaks over her eyes.”

Sokka’s eyes widen, “She must be a Kyoshi warrior. I met them a while ago. They’re a group of female warriors that Avatar Kyoshi started.”

Aang frowns, “That’s weird. I’ve never seen them before, why would they be in my dreams?”

“I have no idea. Maybe you should ask them.”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, next time they appear when you’re sleeping or meditating, ask them what they want.”

“That’s…actually a really good idea, thanks Sokka!”

Sokka smiles, shrugging modestly, “I’ve always been good with ideas.”

Aang pushes himself into a sitting position, crossing his legs, straightening his back and putting his fists together.

“Are you doing it now?”

Aang nods, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath in.

“I’ll be quiet, then,” Sokka whispers, settling further back against the frame of the bed. He watches Aang, waiting for something to happen. Nothing does. His face stays neutral, his breathing even, his entire body perfectly still. Sokka yawns, feeling his tiredness creep back in. He kind of regrets giving Katara the bed.

Just as his eyes start to drift shut, Sokka notices movement. Aang frowns, then opens his eyes. His shoulders slump. “It didn’t work. They weren’t there.”

“Oh.” Sokka’s shoulders slump too, disappointed at the unsatisfied curiosity.

“I don’t normally go looking for them, they just come on their own. I guess I’ll just have to wait.”

Sokka gives him a reassuring smile, “Don’t worry, I’m sure we’ll figure it out.”

Aang smiles back. “Thanks, Sokka. Goodnight.”

“Night, Aang.”

Aang rolls over, back into his bed. Sokka lets his head fall back against the mattress behind him. He _really_ wishes he hadn’t given Katara the bed.

In the morning, Sokka wakes up with a stiff neck, a blocked nose, and a fever. He slept nearly the entire night sat up, with his head tilted back at a right angle to rest on the bed. At some point, he must’ve shifted and fell onto his side, because he woke up on the floor with a throbbing on the side of his head. He opens his eyes with a wince, the light slanting in from the window and blinding his sensitive eyes. In front of him, Katara and Aang are sat cross-legged facing one another, eyes closed in meditation.

Sokka shifts himself upright as quiet as possible but ruins it all with a loud sneeze. And another. And another. Katara opens one eye to look at him, then opens both when she sees the sorry state of him.

“You look terrible.”

“Thanks.” Sokka's voice comes out deep and nasal. He sniffs, forcefully trying to pull air in through his nose unsuccessfully.

“We tried to move you onto the bed, but you’re heavier than you look. Is your head okay?”

“You _dropped_ me?”

Aang opens his eyes, “I tried to catch you with airbending! But I, uh, missed your head.”

Sokka scrambles to get up, moving over to the mirror. His eyes are immediately drawn to the wicked bruise on his temple. He pokes it. Yep, it hurts. His face looks just as terrible, deep bags under his eyes, his nose dripping, his cheeks red hot.

“You’re sick,” Katara points out, coming up behind him and peering at his reflection over his shoulder. “Do you feel as bad as you look?”

“Worse,” Sokka says. And he does. His head feels like it’s stuffed full of cotton, pressure throbbing in his sinuses. His skin burns hot at the surface, but he feels cold to the bone.

“Get back in bed, I’ll get you some tea.”

Sokka follows her orders, slipping under his covers happily and pulling them up to his chin. Katara comes back with some tea and sits at the foot of his bed.

“Any luck with the dream people?” Sokka asks Aang.

“Not much,” Aang says, shoulders slumped in defeat, “me and Katara did some meditation but everything they say just confuses me more."

“What did they say?”

“Nothing specific,” Aang says, crossing his arms.

“From what Aang told me,” Katara says, “it sounded like they’re his past lives.”

“Past _lives_?”

Aang shrugs. “I have no idea _why_ my past lives would want to contact me. It feels like they want me to do something, but I don’t know what.”

“If only Suki were here,” Sokka muses, “then she might be able to tell you who the Kyoshi warrior is, she might know something about her.”

Aang doesn’t look hopeful. “Even if she were, I don’t think I could offer a very good description. It’s all…blurry. Like they’re far away, or I’m disconnected from them in some way.”

“Do you think any of the monks from the Air Temple would know what to do?” Katara asks, “They know all spiritual stuff, they might know what it means.”

“Maybe…Monk Gyatso might know something, I could send him a letter and see what he has to say.”

“Good idea,” Katara says, “I’m sure he’ll know something. Don’t worry.”

“I just…feel like I’m missing something, you know? Like there’s some kind of connection I’m not making.”

“We’ll work it out,” Sokka says, sinking further under the covers, “we’ve got our best minds on it.”

“Yeah, I’d hardly call your mind the _best_ right now,” Katara says, patting him sarcastically. He shrugs her off.

“I’m fine,” Sokka says, “sharp as a tack.”

“Whatever you say. Finish your tea and go back to sleep.”

“You can’t tell me what to do,” Sokka argues, but pulls the covers up to his ears. He’s asleep within the minute.


	7. Chapter 7

The next few weeks pass in a blur. Sokka settles into the workload of university, starts to get to know the city, as well as getting closer with Aang and Toph. Thanks to Toph, he really notices how close Aang and Katara are getting, too, which he really could’ve lived without. They're always hanging out and making each other _giggle_. Katara. _Giggling._ It's vomit-inducing. He and Toph have developed a code for when it's getting too gross - three quick foot taps on the floor and it's time for them to find a reason to escape. Sokka dreads how bad it'll get if they actually end up going further than blushing over each other. At least Toph doesn't have to deal with _that_ part of it.

Sokka and Katara work well together for their class, and Aang avoids talking about Zuko in front of Sokka. Sokka wishes he could say that he doesn’t think about Zuko anymore, that he’s moved on and it was just a small blip, but he always finds his mind drifting off and wondering – what’s Zuko up to? Is he annoyed or upset that Sokka swapped partners without talking to him? Is he glad? He’s made no attempt to reach out to Sokka, as far as he knows, so he can’t be too held up about it. But Sokka still wonders.

It’s when Sokka and Aang are both studying in their room that the peace is disrupted. Their door is thrown open with a slam, followed by the unmistakable bare footsteps of the one and only Toph.

“Can we help you, Miss Beifong?” Sokka teases, not looking up from his work, being used to her dramatic entrances and strong dislike for her family name.

“You _can_ , Mr. Boomerang.”

Sokka looks up and turns around. Aang is already on his feet.

“My first assessment is submitted, done, dusted, gone forever, so I demand celebration.”

“Like, worshipping at your feet celebration, or going out with friends celebration?” Aang asks.

“I’ll take either. Both, actually.”

“Where are you taking us, oh great and mighty assessment-submitter?” Sokka asks.

“Take a guess, where is the only place we _ever_ go.”

“Do you ever think we should branch out? Be, you know, like…adults and go somewhere different. Adults do that, right?” Aang asks.

Sokka shrugs, “Yeah, but nothing beats Iroh’s tea.” Every morning before classes, he’d go for breakfast and a cup of tea. He and Iroh had developed a routine of a Pai Sho game over breakfast whenever Sokka had later classes. It was nice, with his dad hundreds of miles away, still being able to have someone to talk to.

“Yeah, that’s fair.”

“Come on, stop chattering,” Toph says, “get up, we’re going.”

“Now?” Sokka looks back at his work, wanting to get it all done as soon as possible.

“Yes, now. No more work and _no_ complaining. I’m in charge.”

Sokka sighs, “Okay, fine.”

Toph looks to Aang, a habit she’s developed purely because all of them kept getting confused at who she was talking to and she couldn’t stand their complaining that her nicknames weren’t always specific enough. “Do you have any problems, twinkle toes?”

“No.” Aang closes his books behind him with a quick flick of his wrist and a blast of air. Sokka _wishes_ he could do that.

“Good,” Toph says, walking out and leaving them to scramble to get their shoes on fast enough, “hurry up. Katara’s waiting downstairs.”

Sokka welcomes the warm and familiar smells and sounds of the tea shop and Iroh beams at the sight of them, gesturing to an empty table that’ll fit them. Sokka’s curiosity immediately piques at seeing another server through the small window to the kitchen, facing away from him, head down. He’s seen a couple servers in here, but never this one. He glances at the clock on the wall. He rarely comes in at this time, so maybe it’s a shift thing. Maybe it’s the ever-evasive nephew that Sokka had been starting to think Iroh had made up.

The group settles down at a table, all easily picking out their orders without even a glance at the menu.

“Well if it isn’t my favourite group of students,” Iroh says, coming over to their table.

“We’re celebrating Toph’s first submission,” Katara says, “we’re all _very_ proud,” she teases.

Toph blows her hair out of her face.

“Congratulations, Toph. It’s not small feat, university is a difficult thing to adjust to,” Iroh says.

“You’re telling me,” Toph says, “my parents never let me even touch a pen and now I’m expected to write essays?”

“Well, you do have a scribe,” Sokka says, but Toph holds her hand up in front of his face.

“That’s irrelevant.”

Iroh laughs, his deep belly laugh, and the joy easily spreads round the group. “So, what can I get you all today?”

They all list of their orders, and Iroh is about to go leave when some clattering from the kitchen reminds Sokka of his curiosity.

“Hey, Iroh?” He asks, “Who’s in the kitchen? I’ve never seen them here before.”

“Ah, that’ll be my nephew! He hasn’t been working much lately, but I’ve finally dragged him down to earn his keep,” he winks at Sokka, “I’ll have him bring over your order so you can all meet him.”

While everyone drifts into conversation, Sokka stays silent, continually glancing over at the kitchen window to see if he can spot Iroh’s nephew. The curiosity has been killing him for the past few weeks, ever since he first spoke to Iroh, and now he’ll _finally_ know.

“What are you _looking_ at?” Katara finally asks, noticing Sokka’s distance.

“Nothing,” Sokka says, tearing his eyes away from the kitchen and forcing them to stay glued on the table.

“He’s trying to work out if Iroh’s nephew is hot or not,” Toph says, making Sokka’s cheeks flush a deep red.

“Am _not_.”

“Ha!” Katara laughs, “He _so_ is.”

They all laugh and Sokka groans, letting his head fall to the table, wishing he could slide under it and never come out. While they’re all still laughing, he sees a pair of feet appear under the table and Sokka’s heart skips a beat.

“Uh,” the owner of the feet says, “here’s your order.” But… _wait_. Sokka _knows_ that voice. The laughter around his drops off into a terrifying silence. Sokka’s afraid to lift his head up, because he _knows_ what’s going on, he _knows_ who that is, who that voice belongs to, who could cause such a dead silence to fall over the table, but his brain refuses to make the connection, refuses to acknowledge it until the evidence is right there in front of him.

Sokka looks up and makes direct eye contact with none other than Zuko. He looks just as horrified as Zuko feels, his eyes wide and terrified, like a deer dog caught in the torchlight.

“Sokka,” he says.

“Zuko,” Sokka replies, “hi.”

“Hi.”

“Hi, Zuko,” Aang says.

“Hi, Aang.”

“Wait,” Sokka says, his brain moving slow through the tar of shock. Zuko isn’t just here randomly. Zuko is serving their food. Iroh said that he’d send his nephew over with their order. _No._ Sokka’s blood turns as cold as ice, his heart beating painful and slow through it. Sokka has talked to Iroh about Zuko _numerous times_. He _must’ve_ known. The cogs tick round Sokka’s head and he feels sick, the smell of the food in front of him making him nauseous. Zuko is the nephew he's heard so much about; that Iroh cares about so deeply, and worries about, who he said has been through so much, neglected by his parents, separated from his hometown. _That's_ Zuko. And Iroh is his uncle, the man he's had breakfast with for _weeks_ is related to Zuko. _Iroh is Fire Nation._

“I need to go,” he says, standing up fast enough to send his chair careening backwards and hitting the floor with a hard thud.

“Sokka-” Katara starts, standing up, but Sokka’s already gone.

Outside, he heaves in deep lungfuls of air, needing the cold sharpness of it to bring him back to reality. He hears the door creak open behind him and expects Katara to put a hand on his shoulder, or maybe tell him to stop being an idiot, but nothing happens. He can feel the presence behind him, large and _warm_. Oh.

As soon as Sokka gets his breathing under control, he hears Zuko shuffling behind him.

“Sokka-”

“I’m sorry,” Sokka blurts out, not really expecting it, “I’m sorry I freaked out, I’m sorry I was an asshole. It wasn’t fair. And I’m sorry I ditched you in class, I just…I don’t know. I don’t have an excuse.”

“It’s okay,” Zuko says, coming to stand next to Sokka. “I’m sorry, too. I was being an asshole.”

“No, you weren’t.”

Zuko looks away, silent for a minute. “Can we talk?”

“Talk?” Sokka looks over at him. He expected Zuko to hate him, or worse, but the way he’s looking at him now, he can’t see a single drop of hate in his expression.

“We can go inside, up to my Uncle’s apartment.”

“You _want_ to talk?”

“I want to fix things,” Zuko says, “if you want to.”

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s talk.”

Zuko leads the way upstairs, Sokka close behind him. He doesn’t know what to expect. Does Zuko actually hate him, and he’s luring him up here to kill him while his friends are downstairs, oblivious? Okay, maybe Sokka’s getting a bit carried away. That _probably_ won’t happen. But he’s on his guard.

“Here,” Zuko says, opening the door and holding it out for Sokka. He steps inside. It’s small, a kitchen and living room in one, with three doors leading off of it. But it’s cosy. The warm smell of Iroh’s tea has settled into the furniture and Sokka can feel the love emanating from the walls.

“You live here, too? Not in dorms?”

Zuko closes the door behind them, “Yeah, I lived here before I started at the university, so it was the easiest thing to do.”

Sokka nods, and they both stand in awkward silence for a while. Sokka can hear Zuko shuffling his feet.

“Oh, uh, do you want tea?” Zuko asks, breaking the silence and going to the kitchen, pulling out a teapot and cups before Sokka has the chance to answer. Zuko freezes, realising his mistake, and looks to Sokka, eyes wide and expectant. How can Sokka think _this_ guy is dangerous?

“Yeah, please,” Sokka says. He walks over to the sofa, soft and lived-in, “can I sit?”

“Oh, right, yeah, yes, of course,” Zuko says, “sorry. I should’ve offered.”

Sokka laughs, Zuko's awkwardness diffusing the tension slowly, “It’s fine.”

Zuko rolls up his sleeves to start working on the tea, and Sokka’s heart skips a beat. Trailing down his left arm are deep burn marks, matching the scar on his face. That doesn't just look like a training accident. What _happened_ to him?

Sokka waits in silence while Zuko makes tea, watching his carefully considered moves. He can tell Zuko is wholeheartedly familiar with the process, but less so with doing it himself. It’s endearing, in a way, and Sokka finds it easy to watch him, his long fingers moving through the process delicately.

When the tea is done, Zuko turns with a small smile, a cup in each hand. He comes over and hands one to Sokka, sitting down next to him.

“I’m nowhere near as good as my uncle, but I hope you like it.”

Sokka takes a sip and has to hold back a wince. He’s _definitely_ not as good as his uncle, but with that expectant look on Zuko’s face, watching his every move, there’s no way Sokka could say that to him.

“Is it good?”

“Mmm,” Sokka nods, “it’s perfect.”

Zuko’s face breaks into a smile of relief, and Sokka can barely tear his eyes away, but he forces himself to. He’s getting too comfortable.

“I’m sorry,” Zuko says when Sokka turns away, “for making you uncomfortable, and firebending, and for everything the Fire Nation has put you through.”

Sokka shakes his head, “It’s okay, it’s not your fault. I’ve been taking it out on you, and I shouldn’t have been. I’m sorry.”

“Can I ask…what happened?”

"You really want to know?"

"Really."

"It doesn't exactly...paint the Fire Nation in a good light."

"I don't care."

"It's a long story..."

"Sokka," Zuko says, forceful, "I want to know. Please."

"Okay." Sokka takes a deep breath, bracing himself for _this_ conversation. “Our tribe was small. Before I was born, we were invaded by Fire Nation soldiers and they kidnapped all of our waterbenders. We don't know why. It left us…weak, to say the least. When me and Katara were born, it was a miracle. She was the first waterbender of our generation, the only Southern waterbender.”

“But you’re not a bender?” Zuko asks.

“No, just Katara.”

“That must’ve been hard.”

Sokka sits up straighter, looking at Zuko, surprised. No one’s ever really considered how that felt for Sokka, to the point where he no longer acknowledges it himself. It’s just him overreacting, he’d tell himself, when he got annoyed at all the attention focused on Katara and her bending, while Sokka was left behind, useless and talentless. “Yeah, it was,” he looks back down at his knees. “My parents were terrified for her. What if the Fire Nation came back, and tried to take her, too? My dad is the Chief, so he’d be taking boats out and sending soldiers out to keep the tribe protected, so we’d have some warning if they tried to come back. I spent my entire childhood forcing my dad to let me join in on training sessions so that I’d be strong enough to defend Katara. I was so terrified I’d lose her, and I knew I’d be the last line of defence.”

“That’s horrible, Sokka. That shouldn’t have been your burden to bear.”

“But it was, the Fire Nation made it my burden.”

Zuko shuts up, and Sokka feels immediately guilty.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t-” Sokka says, “it’s not your fault. My dad would only let me train with a boomerang at first, so I got _really_ good at that,” he lets out a small chuckle, then feels the seriousness fall back in when he realises what comes next in this story. “It was when we were eight. The one day, _one day_ , that no ships are out, we get a Fire Nation raid. You know firebenders are coming when the black snow falls. I’d heard so many stories about the last raid from everyone in the tribe, and I hoped I’d never see black snow, but…it came. Me and Katara were playing together when it happened. She went to go find our mum, and I _stupidly_ didn’t go with her, I went to find our dad. All those years I’d been preparing myself to protect her, and then when it actually came to it…” Sokka takes a deep breath, “I found my dad fighting off Fire Nation soldiers. I helped him and our other soldiers the best I could, but they were gone before the fight even started. I thought we’d managed to scare them off, that we’d gotten rid of them before they’d even _seen_ Katara. But then Katara showed up, yelling for my dad that our mother was in trouble. We all ran back to our house, but it was too late. She was dead, and _Zhao_ was there, leaving her body for us to find. My dad nearly killed him, but he escaped. After that, my dad let me train with more than just a boomerang.”

“Sokka, I’m so sorry.”

“I can’t stop thinking about what would’ve happened if I’d gone with Katara that day. I could’ve protected our mum and maybe she’d still be here today. She’d have seen Katara grow up to be the best waterbender I’ve ever seen. She’d have been able to see us go to university. She’d visit us. My dad would be happy.”

“You can’t blame yourself. It’s Zhao’s fault.”

“But I could’ve _stopped_ him.”

“You were a kid, Sokka. It’s not your responsibility.”

“It _is_. I should be able to protect the people I love, but I always let them down and get them killed.”

“This story isn’t over yet, is it?”

“I wish it was.”

“You don’t have to-”

“No, I want to,” Sokka insists, even though he’s not sure.

“Do you want some more tea, first?”

Sokka nods and hands Zuko his cup. He sits silently while Zuko works in the kitchen, hands shaking at the memory of what comes next. While he’s spent the last three years reliving this day, he’s never told the story to anyone, never relived it like _this._

“Here,” Zuko sits back down and hands him more tea. Sokka takes a sip, and he’s warmed up to the taste a little. It’s nowhere near Iroh, but he could learn to love it.

“Thank you,” Sokka says, closing his eyes and giving himself a moment before he starts. “When we turned fourteen, our grandma decided Katara needed to learn waterbending from a master. She’d been practising some simple forms from what she knew intuitively, and what people around the tribe remembered from the old benders, but it wasn’t much. She fought with our dad for _days_ , but he eventually gave in. So, we took a boat and made the journey to the Northern Water Tribe. They’d managed to stay safe from the Fire Nation, and it showed as soon as we arrived. Our tribe felt pathetic in comparison. We stayed there for about a year.”

Sokka leans forward and puts his empty cup on the table, bracing himself.

“On our first day there, I met this girl. The princess. She was amazing, in every way. I was head over heels for her. Katara was so busy with waterbending training, I was always at a loose end just hanging around the city. So, I spent a lot of time with the princess. We quickly became friends, and then soon…more. She was engaged, an arranged marriage, and she almost broke it off between us. But then…she changed her mind; she was going to break off her engagement. For _me_. She said she didn’t care if her father disowned her if it meant we could be together. I couldn’t believe it. A girl like her, a Northern _princess_ was interested in me, a Southern peasant. I don’t know how much you know about Water Tribe traditions, but when we get engaged, it’s tradition to give your partner a betrothal necklace. I made one for her, it took me forever. I was going to give it to her once she’d broken her engagement.”

Sokka reaches into his pocket and pulls it out, too deep in thought about her to be embarrassed that he still carries it around. He runs his fingers over it for a moment, feeling the moon carving on the pendant.

“I never got to give it to her. She didn’t even know about it,” Sokka says, glancing at the window next to them. The sun is low in the sky, almost below the horizon. Above it, high in the sky, watching over them, is the moon. Sokka’s breath catches in his throat.

“Can I see it?”

Sokka hesitates but passes it over with shaking hands. Zuko takes it gently, running his fingers over it.

“It’s beautiful,” he says, handing it back to Sokka carefully. They’re both silent for a long minute. “Why didn't you get to propose?"

“It was the day she was supposed to talk to her father about her engagement, the day everything was supposed to get better. But then the Fire Nation showed up. It was so unexpected; they overwhelmed the North’s troops. They got in easily. The Chief asked me to protect the princess, to watch over her and make sure she was safe. We hid in the Spirit Oasis, in the centre of the city. It should’ve been the safest place. It was a sacred place in the city, but even more so to her. It was the place that gave her life. When she’d been born, she wasn’t breathing, she was barely alive. Her parents brought her to the Spirit Oasis and Tui saved her by giving her some of its life force. They were connected, deeply.”

“Tui?” Zuko asks, and Sokka remembers that he hasn’t grown up around waterbenders and Water Tribe culture.

“Tui is the moon spirit, the original waterbender. Its mortal form is a koi fish, with La, the ocean spirit.”

Zuko nods.

“Zhao came to the Spirit Oasis. I don’t know how he got through, but he did. It was my worst nightmare, the man that killed my mother coming for the girl I loved. I thought he was coming for the princess, I did my best to defend her, but…I was wrong. He was after something else. It was Tui. He knew waterbenders get their power from the moon, and he was there to take them out. For good. I wasn’t fast enough, I couldn’t stop him…he killed the spirit, and fled while we were both in shock. We both thought it was over, the moon was gone, the sky was blood red, and then it wasn't...it was like all the colour had been leeched from the world. It was…we thought it was the end.”

Zuko gasps, “I remember that day. Everyone thought it was a freak astronomical event.”

Sokka shakes his head. “It wasn’t.” Sokka tries to psyche himself up to finish the story, his shaking hands gripping the necklace tightly.

Zuko puts a gentle hand on Sokka’s shoulder. “What happened to her?”

“She was smart. She was always so, so smart. I wish she wasn’t; I wish she hadn’t thought of it. She knew she carried some of Tui’s spirit within her. So, she decided she could give it back. She sacrificed herself, and resurrected Tui. I’ll never forget the feeling of her cold body in my arms. I got to see her spirit once before she was gone forever. She and the moon spirit were intertwined, forever. I like to think she’s still watching over me, still looking out for the world.”

“She sounds brave.”

“She was. So brave. But the thing is…I would’ve traded it all. If it meant she would’ve survived, I’d have traded it all, the moon, waterbending, all of it. I don’t care. If it meant she got to live, none of it matters. Even if I never got to be with her, I just wish she got to live the rest of her life.”

Sokka drops his head into his hands, knowing how selfish he is, but he can’t help it. She deserved more of a life than she got.

“Sokka, I’m so sorry,” Zuko says, shifting imperceptibly closer. “What was her name?”

Sokka takes a deep breath. He hasn’t said her name in nearly three years, not since she died. “Yue. Her name was Yue.”

“That’s a beautiful name.”

“She was named after the moon. Her parents always knew that would be her destiny. I still wish I could’ve stopped her.”

“Sokka…” Zuko grabs his shoulders and pulls him into a hug, “there’s nothing you could’ve done.”

Sokka lets a silent tear fall while he’s in Zuko’s arms. He’d spent all this time avoiding talking about her, and now after finally breaking that silence she felt more alive than ever, even if the heartbreak feels raw again. It feels like he's torn himself open, exposing all his insides for Zuko to see. All his feelings for Yue, all that love and pain and heartbreak, it's overflowing, pouring out of him. He squeezes Zuko tighter, feeling a wave of appreciation for him, for being here with him, listening to him.

“I’m sorry that all that happened to you, I understand why you must hate firebenders.”

“I don’t,” Sokka says, “not you, at least.”

Zuko pulls away and smiles, small and gentle, and Sokka processes just how _close_ they are. The sofa is small, and after hugging they’re so close that Sokka can feel the gentle heat of Zuko’s breath against his face. Of course, he’d looked at Zuko before, and _obviously_ he’d recognised how attractive he is, but up close is something else entirely. His face is angular, masculine, but with a certain softness to it, in the curve of his eyebrow, the set of his mouth. Sokka’s sure he could stare at his face for hours. His scar up close is something else, too, bright flames burnt into his skin. His left eye is thin and slanted, the gold missing and nothing but a milky white in its place.

“Your eye…” Sokka says, “can you see?”

Zuko stiffens, ever so slightly, and Sokka’s afraid he’s touched on a sensitive topic. “No,” Zuko says, “my left side is pretty much useless. I can’t see anything, hear anything, and the skin isn’t really sensitive either.”

“You can’t feel anything?” Sokka asks, unconsciously bringing one hand up to Zuko’s face. It hovers there for a moment, but seeing that Zuko doesn’t flinch away, he gently touches the skin on his forehead, rough and uneven.

“I can feel it, a little. But it's not the same.”

Sokka lets his fingers trail down, past Zuko’s eye and to his cheek.

“What happened-”

They both flinch at a loud banging on the door before the door is thrown open. They both jump a mile, putting as much distance between each other as possible. In the doorway, Iroh is stood with Aang, Katara and Toph behind him.

“We were wondering if you were ever returning,” Iroh says.

“We were just…” Zuko starts.

“…having a conversation,” Sokka finishes.

“Right,” Katara says, one eyebrow raised, “having a conversation on opposite ends of the room.”

“Trust me, that’s _not_ how they were before the door opened,” Toph says.

Sokka _wishes_ he could glare at her. He settles for kicking the floor, hoping she gets the idea. He throws a quick glance in Zuko’s direction, and sees the pink colouring his cheeks. He can’t help but smile. This is the lightest he’s felt in years.

“Come on, idiot, it’s dark. We should get home,” Katara says. Sokka glances out the window, and she’s right. The sky is pitch black, Yue’s light shining down across Ba Sing Se. At his lack of movement, Katara comes over and grabs him by the wrist, dragging him across the floor and out the door.

“Bye, Zuko!” Sokka calls out behind him. He can _feel_ Katara roll her eyes.

“You two made up quickly,” Katara says when they’re back out on the street, heading home.

“Yeah, I guess so.”

Katara glances down, noticing the necklace still gripped in Sokka’s hand. “Are you alright? Really?”

Sokka looks up at the moon with a smile just for Yue, “Yeah, I think I am.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still think that yue's story is the saddest of the whole show


	8. Chapter 8

Sokka wakes up with the sun barely peeking over the horizon, the entire room illuminated with a golden sheen. He’s surprised. He’s normally able to sleep through the entire morning and then some unless prompted otherwise. He’d dreamt about Yue; talking about her yesterday, bringing back all those feelings, it all brought her back into the forefront of his mind. He sits up, pulling the necklace out from under his pillow. He runs the ribbon through his hand and traces the pendant. His biggest regret is never having been able to give it to her, to never tell her _how much_ she meant to him. How much she still does.

Sokka sighs, looking over at Aang. He really doesn’t feel like being alone at the moment, but he can’t bear to wake him up. For once, he’s sleeping peacefully. The past few weeks, Aang’s dreams and interruptions have been getting worse and worse, to the point where he’s hardly even sleeping and has even gotten visions of these people while he’s awake. Whatever they’re trying to tell him still hasn’t gotten any clearer, either. Katara’s still sure they’re his past lives, somehow remerging, and Sokka’s sure she’s probably right, but Aang’s holding off judgement until he gets a response from Gyatso.

Carefully and quietly, so as not to disturb Aang, Sokka creeps out of bed. He changes quickly, throwing on a couple extra layers for the brisk-looking early morning, and sneaks out the door.

Once he’s outside, he breathes in the fresh morning air. He was right; it is colder today, and it makes him a little bit homesick. They’re a good few weeks into the semester, so he hopes his dad can visit soon. There’s so much he’d love to talk about with him, not to mention the fact that he misses him more than he thought possible.

Sokka’s feet lead him down the familiar route until he’s outside his destination. He’s probably _far_ too early to expect anyone to be awake, but he really can’t help it. After yesterday, after that conversation, and that _moment_ before they were interrupted, he hasn't been able to stop thinking about Zuko. He wants to know more about him; how he got his scar, why he left the Fire Nation, what happened to his parents. It’s killing him, but he doesn’t want to push Zuko to talk about things he’s uncomfortable with.

Sokka tries to peer in the window, but the shutters are down, the ‘closed’ sign hung over the door. He sighs. Just his luck. He tries the handle, but the doors locked. Well, he can always come back later, he supposes. The ache in his chest drawing him to Zuko will just have to wait.

He’s just about to turn around and go home when the lock clicks and the door creaks open. Iroh pokes his head out, and his eyebrows go up when he sees Sokka.

“Sokka, you’re here early,” Iroh says, stepping back and opening the door for him, “come in, I wasn’t expecting you. We’re not open yet, but…you’re family.” Iroh smiles and Sokka feels a warmth bloom in his chest. He really can’t thank Iroh enough for giving him a place of comfort amongst the confusing changes and homesickness of university.

“Sorry,” Sokka says, stepping inside, “I couldn’t sleep and I, uh, fancied your tea,” he explains, not really wanting to admit that the reason he was here was because he couldn’t stop thinking about his nephew.

Iroh raises one eyebrow, clearly not believing Sokka’s excuse for one second. He gestures for Sokka to sit while he pulls out a teapot, “Zuko’s doing some sunrise exercises, he’ll probably be finished up soon and through for his breakfast.”

“He’s awake?”

“He’s very dedicated to his training,” Iroh explains, almost sadly, and it only makes Sokka’s desperation to know more about Zuko even worse, “the most dedicated firebenders rise with the sun.”

Sokka nods, as if that makes any sense to him. He doesn’t know much about firebending beyond its destructive nature, but he supposes he’s going to have to start getting over his discomfort if he wants to spend time with a firebender. He can try, at least.

Iroh places a cup of tea in front of Sokka and sits down opposite him with his own cup.

“I’d like to apologise,” Iroh says, “for not telling you my identity sooner. I didn’t want to get in the way of what was going on between you and my nephew, I knew it was important for you two to figure it out by yourself, but it was wrong to mislead you.”

“It’s fine, really,” Sokka says, “I understand.”

Iroh nods gratefully.

“Are you…a firebender, too?”

“I am. I was a very talented one, too, in my youth,” Iroh chuckles ever so slightly, “but I don’t use it for much beyond heating up tea, these days.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“Did you leave the Fire Nation with Zuko, when he left?”

Iroh nods, “We travelled for a while, then moved to Ba Sing Se.”

“What happened? With your family? Because his sisters here, but he said he hasn’t seen his parents in years…”

“That’s a long, sad, story, and not mine to tell, I’m afraid.”

“Right, of course, I-”

“Can I ask you a favour, Sokka?”

Sokka nods.

“I’m so glad to see you and Zuko fixing things between the two of you. And I can tell your friendship will be very good for him,” Iroh smiles, “Last night, he was happier than I’ve seen him in a long, long time. Zuko has been through a lot, far, far too much someone should have to for his age, or any age. It has taken him many years to get to the point he’s at today, and I’m afraid that he’s still precarious. I just ask that you’re careful with him and wait until he’s ready to tell you about his past. I know it can be difficult, when you know bits and pieces, but wait until he decides it’s time to tell you about what happened with his family, and his scar, and leaving the Fire Nation. Don’t push him too quickly, it's still a...sensitive topic.”

Sokka takes a deep breath, taking that in. He only feels guiltier, now, thinking of how he’d pushed his own trauma onto Zuko and used him as someone easy to blame. Of course, Zuko’s been through his own tragedies. Sokka just hopes that in his anger he didn’t rub salt in any wounds.

“Of course,” Sokka says, “I wouldn’t want to-”

There’s a loud bang from the kitchen, and Sokka shuts up quickly. A door slams, and there’s some shuffling around. Sokka’s heart skips _several_ beats. Why does he feel like this at just the _prospect_ of seeing Zuko?

“Pr- Zuko!” Iroh calls out, “We have a guest.”

“A guest?” Zuko’s gruff voice calls back, “We’re not even open yet, who on earth-”

Zuko walks through the archway from the kitchen, halfway through pulling his shirt over his head. Now Sokka’s heart does _far_ more than skipping some beats, hammering away in his chest at the brief glimpse of Zuko’s stomach, simultaneously breaking at the sight of the faint burn marks on the left side of his body, trailing off across his stomach.

Zuko gets his head through his shirt and catches Sokka’s eyes. Immediately, his face blooms crimson. “Oh, uh, Sokka. Hi.”

“Hey, Zuko.”

Zuko comes over to the table and starts to pull out the chair next to Iroh, but Iroh stands up quickly, holding his chair out for Zuko. “I’ll make breakfast,” he says, letting Zuko sit and disappearing into the kitchen.

“You’re here,” Zuko says, “I didn’t expect you to ever want to see me again. After all that’s happened to you…”

“None of that was anything to do with you.”

“I still wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to steer clear of firebenders, or _anyone_ Fire Nation, for the rest of your life.”

“You're hardly the _Fire Lord,_ though, Zuko,” Sokka jokes.

Zuko just looks uncomfortable, ducking his head down. “Right.”

“Listen, Zuko,” Sokka says, serious again. He reaches across the table and grabs Zuko’s hand, meeting his eyes without fear when he looks back up. “I haven’t been able to talk some of that stuff in _years_. I haven’t even _said_ Yue’s name since before…” Sokka looks down at their two hands joined together, neither moving away, “and now, I can think about her, I can _talk_ about her again. She finally feels…real, again. Before, I tried to keep her to myself, I tried to keep her memory alive by not talking about her like she’s _gone_ , but it just made me feel further away from her, like she was slipping away. Now, I know she’s not gone. She’s still here. Thank you, Zuko, really.”

“All I did was listen.”

“Sometimes, that’s enough.” Sokka looks back up at Zuko, meeting his eyes. One gold, one white. Now, level-headed, Sokka can see the difference between his and Zhao’s eyes. Zhao’s eyes were a dark, muddy bronze, _nothing_ like Zuko’s. Zuko’s eye is a light gold, shimmering and clear. Sokka could stare at it for hours.

Iroh comes back in with a tray of noodles, and the two flinch, pulling their hands apart. He sits down with a smile, dishing out the bowls.

“Mmm,” Sokka hums, sniffing the delicious meat-y, noodle-y smell wafting up, “these smell amazing.”

Iroh chuckles, “That’s what you say every day.”

“And every day I mean it.”

They all dig into their food, and a comfortable silence passes over the three as they eat.

“So,” Sokka says between mouthfuls, “do you have any embarrassing baby pictures of Zuko?”

Zuko ducks his head with a groan and Sokka beams wider.

“Ahh, I wish I did! Sadly, they’re all back at the- well, his parent’s house. But I have _more_ than enough embarrassing baby _stories.”_

“No-” Zuko tries.

Sokka waves him off, “Ignore him, I need to hear these.”

Zuko groans again, dropping his head to the table with a heavy thud.

“Well, I’m sure you can tell this from his bubbly personality-” Zuko lifts his head up enough to glare at Iroh, “-but he was a very excitable child.”

“Oh, I can just imagine.” Zuko turns his glare on Sokka, who meets it with a grin.

“Once, our family was on holiday near the beach, and I’d taken Zuko and my own son down to the beach for the afternoon. Now, Zuko had grown up on stories of his- of the avatar, Roku. We were still feeling the impact he’d had on the Fire Nation, long after his disappearance. Zuko had a strong fascination with him, and always wanted to hear all kinds of stories. He was a firebender from a young age, but for some reason that afternoon he’d convinced himself that he could bend all the other elements, too, just like Roku. He dragged me down to the water, ready to show me the result of all his training. I watched him walk along the edge of the water, kicking up sand with one leg, kicking up water with the other, firebending with one hand, and punching thin air with the other.” Iroh laughs. “It was very impressive; I was quite proud.”

Zuko crosses his arms, “And then father brought Azula down to the beach and she showed up my firebending while he chastised my childishness.”

Iroh gives Sokka a look that says _don’t mind him_ , but Sokka does. Just a _hint_ into what Zuko’s home life was like is enough to make his heart ache to know more, to console him.

“Well, your father wouldn’t know talent if it hit him in the face.”

Zuko’s eyes widen and he looks at his uncle in appalled awe, as though he’d said something blasphemous.

“Well, I, for one, think you’re a very talented avatar,” Sokka says, grinning at Zuko’s increasingly flushed cheeks.

“Do you guys really think the avatar cycle is over?” Zuko asks, “I know Roku disappeared after he stopped Sozin, but is the avatar just _gone_ , then?”

Sokka shrugs, “I don’t know much about the avatar. I mean, I know a bit about Avatar Kuruk, but not much. Though, when I was a kid, my parents would always talk about it when they thought me and Katara weren’t listening. She had just started waterbending, and they wondered if she could be the next avatar.”

“Katara?” Zuko asks, sitting upright and leaning forward.

“She was the only waterbender left in the South, it would’ve made sense. They thought that an airbender could’ve lived their entire life without realising they were the avatar, and the cycle had moved onto water. Me and Katara even snuck off to try and see if she could bend any other elements, but nothing ever really came of it.” Sokka shrugs again, “Maybe she is, and I’m just terrible at prompting bending. But I hope not. She’s already got enough to worry about carrying an entire culture on her back.”

Zuko nods, “I would’ve killed to be the avatar when I was a kid, but now…I know I’d just mess it up.”

“I think that the avatar could still be out there, somewhere, and I think that when we really need them,” Iroh says, “the avatar will return.”

On the way back to his room, Sokka stops to check for post, hoping something has _finally_ come from his dad, having heard nothing from him since he’d dropped Sokka and Katara off.

He checks the slot for his and Aang’s room and finds _two_ letters inside, one for him, one for Aang. He practically sprints upstairs.

“Aang,” Sokka says, slamming the door open, only realising afterwards that Aang could still be asleep. Luckily, he’s awake and dressed, sat on his bed. He looks up at Sokka expectantly. “We have _letters._ ”

Aang’s face splits open in a smile, and Sokka hands him his letter.

“This is _amazing_ , it’ll be dad, I hope he’s visiting soon,” Sokka says.

“I hope it’s Monk Gyatso,” Aang says, “he’s so busy, but maybe…”

They both tear into their letters. Sokka speeds through it, happy to hear about all the news from home, but knowing he can go over that more thoroughly later. He starts skimming, _Kanna…Bato…polar bears…festival…_ and…yes! _“I’m sure you’ve just skimmed over this entire letter to get to this part, so I’ll trust Katara will keep you up to date. I’ve organised a boat to the Earth Kingdom to visit you two, I should be arriving a few days after this letter arrives.”_

“Yes!” Sokka says, “My dad’s visiting in a few days!”

“That’s great, Sokka!”

“I’ll be back,” Sokka says, already half out the door, “Tell me about what Gyatso’s said when I’m back,” he calls out behind him, “I need to see Katara!”

Sokka runs downstairs and across the path between the two dorms, and then up to Katara and Toph’s room. He barges in, finding Katara sat on the edge of the bed, reading over the letter, too. Toph is still in bed and drags her pillow over her head with a groan.

“He’ll be here in a few days,” Sokka says with a wide grin.

“I know,” Katara grins back, standing up just in time for Sokka to pick her up and spin her around.

“This is amazing, we can show him around campus, and the library, and introduce him to Toph, and Aang, and-”

“And?” Katara asks, an eyebrow raised.

“Shut up.”

“No, continue, who were you going to say?”

Sokka sighs, “You’re the worst. Really, really, just terrible.”

“Go on, Sokka, who are you going to introduce dad to? Are you gonna tell him all about _Zuko_ and how you guys were hiding up in his bedroom for _hours_?”

“We weren’t in his _bedroom_ , and today we weren’t even-” Sokka stops as soon as he realises his mistake.

“ _Today?_ You’ve seen him _today_? You’re normally barely even awake at this time and you’ve _already_ seen him?”

Sokka’s cheeks flush red. Toph lifts her head enough to laugh. “Sokka’s in _looove_ ,” she teases. Sokka grabs Katara’s pillow and throws it at her, but it barely even muffles her laughter.

“You can hardly talk,” Sokka looks back at a now laughing Katara, “what about _Aang_ , huh? How are you gonna introduce him to dad? ‘Hey dad, this is the boy I spend every waking moment with, are you ready to walk me down the aisle?’”

Toph lets out a short, sharp laugh and rolls over so she’s facing the ceiling. “He’s got you there, sweetness.”

“Sweetness? That’s a new one.”

“Suits her, doesn’t it?”

Katara hits Sokka across the shoulder. “Shut _up_ , both of you. Did you read the _rest_ of dad’s letter, by any chance?”

“I, uh, skimmed it?”

Katara rolls her eyes, “He was talking about the end-of-semester plans, trying to make sure we’ll be home in time for the glacier spirits festival.”

Sokka waves his hand dismissively, “That’s _ages_ away.”

A tentative knock on the door disturbs them.

“Yes?” Katara says.

The door pushes open, Aang behind it. “Sorry to disturb your guy’s celebrations, but I’ve got…weird news.”

“Weird or bad?” Sokka asks.

“I don’t know. Gyatso has responded to my letter about the weird visions I’ve been getting, and he’s worried. He’s said he’s going to schedule a visit as soon as possible, in maybe a couple weeks or so, but he said if I’m getting these visions it could mean something bad. He wants me to meditate on them as much as possible until he gets here, but he can’t tell me anything more over a letter, and we’ll have to wait until he’s here.”

“What does that even mean, something bad?” Toph asks. Aang shrugs.

“Oh, Aang,” Katara says, standing up and bringing him into a hug, “I’m sure it’ll be okay.”

“I hope so.”

“Whatever happens, we’re on your side,” Sokka says, “Team Aang, ready to take on the world. We’ve got air, water, earth, and boomerang.”

“I think you’re missing an element there, Sokka," Katara starts, "maybe you should ask-”

Sokka shuts her up quickly with a pillow to the face, and the tension hanging in the room quickly dissolves into carefree laughter.


	9. Chapter 9

On the monorail platform, Sokka can barely contain himself, bouncing on his heels to get a better look further down the track leading out of Ba Sing Se.

“Can you stay still for one moment?” Katara asks.

“No,” Sokka says, continuing his movements.

Katara nudges Sokka. He looks over at her and really doesn’t like the look in her eye. “So, you gonna take dad to the Jasmine Dragon?”

Sokka rolls his eyes, “Me and Zuko hated each other, like, five minutes ago.”

“Oh, give up, you’re far _more_ than friends, already.”

Sokka frowns, “What’s _that_ supposed to mean?”

“Don’t play dumb, I know your type.”

Sokka raises his eyebrows, “Oh yeah, what’s my type, then?”

“People who can and will beat you up.”

“Zuko's not-" Sokka starts, then stops. He does firebending practice _every_ morning. Plus, the brief glimpse Sokka got of Zuko's stomach muscles is still permanently imprinted into his brain. Zuko could definitely beat him up. "That's not even my type. Yue wouldn’t-”

Katara looks surprised as soon as her name leaves his lips, but she takes it in her stride, quickly covering her surprise. “Yue could’ve and would’ve taken you, should she have had to.”

Sokka sighs, crossing his arms. “Maybe.”

“But fine, people who can and will beat you up, and royalty.”

“Okay, I date one princess and one warrior, and now I have a _type_?”

“You say that like I haven’t known every single person you’ve had a crush on, too.”

“Whatever,” Sokka says, “but I want royalty off the list. I’m hardly swooning over the Earth King or the Fire Lord.”

“Oh, I’m sure they’ve got plenty of gorgeous children for you to drool over.”

Sokka pulls a face. That's _never_ happening.

“So, you’re really gonna deny dad the opportunity to try Iroh’s tea just because you’re not ready to introduce him to Zuko? I’m gonna introduce him to Aang.”

Sokka turns, stabbing a finger in Katara’s face. “Was that an _admission_?”

Katara stabs back. “Was _that_ an admission?”

They stare at one another, neither breaking the gaze between them. Eventually, Katara looks away.

“Aang is nice.”

“I’m not denying that,” Sokka says, “but I’m not about to start kissing the guy.” Katara glares at him and he puts his hands up in mock-defeat. “Each to their own,” he says.

"I still think you should introduce dad to Zuko."

"And say what? Dad, I'd like you to meet Zuko, I punched him in the face for hurting Katara and then hated him for the entire semester so far. Oh, except for the past week when we've been hanging out non-stop."

Katara raises an eyebrow. "Non-stop, huh?"

Sokka looks away, "Shut up."

"Just saying, dad'll like him."

"Dad hates the Fire Nation."

" _Dad_ knows how to be objective, unlike _someone_."

Sokka sighs, "Okay, okay, I get it."

"So yes to introducing him?"

"I'll tell him about Zuko, but that's _all_. No introductions. I'm not trying to freak Zuko out by bringing my dad over after being friends for a _literal week._ "

Katara still doesn't look impressed. "You know, you'll have to introduce them before you two get married, or the wedding might get a bit awkward."

If only Sokka were a bender, Katara would have a snowball to the face right now.

The three of them go out to dinner and Sokka feels weightless. It feels nice, being able to spend time as a family without threat and responsibility looming over all of them. Sure, he misses home more than anything, but it’s a relief to have a break from the pressure of it. Other than the looming threat of Katara trying to bring up Zuko in every spare moment, that is.

After dinner in Ba Sing Se, Sokka and Katara give their dad a tour round the city and the campus. Through something that he can only assume is Katara’s fault, they end up outside the Jasmine Dragon.

Sokka tries to hide his immediate discomfort. “So, yeah, this is the tea place we told you about. How about we show you our dorms now?”

Hakoda laughs, easily recognising Sokka’s behaviour. “You’re going to tell me you have breakfast here everyday and rave about it but not let me go inside?”

“I mean, it’s getting dark…”

“Come on, Sokka, there’s _plenty_ of time for tea,” Katara teases, giving him a knowing look. Sokka makes a mental note to kill her tonight.

Sokka crosses his arms, “Fine, whatever.” Hakoda and Katara share a look that he _doesn’t_ like.

“After you,” Katara says, and Sokka’s going to have to find a more violent method for later.

The bells rings as Sokka pushes open the door, and of course, of _course_ , Zuko is working. He looks up from waiting a table, directly at Sokka. Sokka’s heart flutters at the way Zuko’s face breaks into a smile as soon as he sees him. This will be painful.

“Hey, over here!” A familiar voice calls. Aang and Toph are sat on a table in the corner. Aang and the seat next to him are surrounded by work, while Toph swings back on her chair, eyes closed. They’re all going to make this as painful as possible, Sokka can feel it.

Katara drags them over to the table.

“What are you guys doing here?” Sokka asks.

“Oh, me and Zuko are doing the assignment in between him working,” Aang explains, “and Toph was bored so she just-” Aang freezes when Hakoda joins them, eyes going wide. He stands up, knocking half his stuff everywhere. “Hello Sir, Mr…Chief…uh, Katara and Sokka’s dad.”

Hakoda laughs, deep and hearty. It makes Sokka feel like he’s at home again, _really_ at home, when his dad would laugh often and hard. His mum was a funny person. “Call me Hakoda, please.”

“Dad, this is Aang and Toph, our roommates we told you about,” Katara says. Aang smiles cheesily and Toph waves a hand.

They drag some chairs up to the table, leaving Zuko’s empty. Sokka really isn’t surprised that it just so happens that the only space for a chair is next to Zuko. Katara _definitely_ didn’t plan that one.

Sokka watches with nerves as they all settle in together, his dad asking about Aang and Toph, their lives, their studies, all that polite stuff. He zones out, watching Zuko moving around the room behind them. Every now and then, he glances over and Sokka has to quickly duck his head so Zuko doesn’t catch him. He’s not sure he’s successful.

After a while, Zuko finishes up serving and cleaning and comes over to the table, with a smile that Sokka’s _sure_ can’t be directed just at him.

“The service here really is terrible,” Toph says as soon as Zuko stops at the table, one hand frozen on his chair ready to pull it out, “they’ve been here for _ages_ , now.”

“Ha, ha, Toph,” Zuko says, “wait, but. Ah, shit. Do you guys want anything?”

“We’ll take three of your finest teas, good server,” Sokka tells him.

“Four,” Toph says.

“Five,” Aang adds.

“I’ll make that six of our finest tea,” Zuko says, with another small smile, “I won’t be long.”

“Are you gonna _introduce_ him?” Katara says, a loud whisper that really can’t be counted as such, emphasised with a kick under the table. Sokka glares at her.

“Wait,” he says, grabbing Zuko’s wrist. His skin is burning hot under his palm, and Sokka can feel his pulse jumping. He’s sure his own starts to match it. “Zuko this is, uh, my dad. He’s visiting. Dad, this is Zuko, the guy I told you about.”

Zuko's eyes go wide and cheeks flush. Surely, that's just Zuko being afraid to meet new people, not because Sokka just let it slip that he'd been talking about him, right? Zuko recovers quickly and sticks his free hand out across the table, “Nice to meet you, sir.”

Hakoda takes his hand, shaking it with a smile, “Hakoda,” he corrects, “nice to meet you, too.”

They drop hands, but Zuko still lingers. “Uh, Sokka…”

Sokka looks up at him, but Zuko is looking down at Sokka’s hand still wrapped around his wrist. Sokka drops it with a flinch, pulling his hand away quickly. “Right, sorry,” he says, ducking his head to hide his burning cheeks. He can feel Zuko looking at him for a moment more, then drift away again.

Toph snorts from next to him. “You’re a smooth guy,” she whispers. He looks up enough to glare at Toph but remembers that that doesn’t _work_. He kicks her foot instead. He’s done it enough times, at this point she knows what it means. Across the table, he notices Katara and his dad whispering. _Great_.

Zuko doesn’t take long to return with their tea, and Sokka’s happy to feel his warm presence slip into the seat next to him. He's more comfortable already.

“Hey,” Zuko says softly, just for Sokka.

“Hey,” Sokka says back.

Sokka wants to pay attention to the group, he really does. He’s happy that Aang and Toph are getting on so well with his dad, that they’re all happy and enjoying themselves. His dad’s telling some story he’s probably heard a million times, and he tries _so hard_ to listen to it again, but all he can think about is Zuko’s presence next to him. Something clearly isn’t right with him. At the beginning of the week, he couldn’t stand Zuko. Now…he can’t even bear to be away from him. This is impossible.

His chair is a little bit too far from the table, so he tucks it in further. Maybe he shuffles it a bit in Zuko’s direction in the process, but that’s beside the point. Zuko doesn’t notice. He hopes. He can feel his warmth even more now, seeping through Sokka’s clothes. That combined with the tea and the short nights from waking up early every morning to see Zuko, starts to lull Sokka to sleep. He feels his eyes drifting shut, the conversation around him blurring into background noise. His head falls forward, then to the side, landing on a soft, warm shoulder. The shoulder stays still, and Sokka lets sleep envelope him. At some point, he’s sure he feels a head rest on top of his own, but the enticing tendrils of sleep pull him back under before he can question it further.

“Sokka,” a distant voice says, too light to hold onto. “Sokka,” it repeats.

“Sokka, wake up,” another voice says, deeper. Sokka hears the rumble of it, deep in the owner’s chest, the steady breathing underneath it. “Sokka,” it says again, gradually pulling Sokka out of sleep. He starts to process his surroundings, the warmth under his cheek and against his side. The hand resting gently on the back of his neck, spreading more warmth throughout his body.

“Huh?” Sokka says, sitting upright and opening his eyes. The brightness of the room is harsh, and he winces, giving himself a moment. Then he _really_ processes it. The warmth along his side is gone, a cold tingling left on his skin. _He fell asleep on Zuko_. Zuko’s hand drops away from Sokka. He looks around, but all the other customers are gone. The only ones left are Zuko and Aang.

“You fell asleep,” Zuko explains.

“Right,” Sokka says.

“On Zuko,” Aang adds with a smile.

“ _Right_.” Sokka looks over at Zuko, cheeks flaming red, expecting a look of distaste or discomfort, at least. He’s met with nothing but a warm, if a bit shy, smile.

“Katara and Toph have gone back to their dorm, they walked your dad to where he's staying. He said he’d meet you two for breakfast, tomorrow,” Aang says, “we should get back, too, though. It’s getting late.”

Sokka nods, the cobwebs of sleep still clinging to the corners of his brain. “Good idea.”

They all get up, Sokka moving in a half-sleeping daze. He helps Aang and Zuko pack their work away. In their movement, Sokka and Zuko’s fingers briefly skim past one another, that single, light touch sending electricity shooting down Sokka’s arm. Well, he’s awake now.

They get everything packed up, say goodbye, and start head out.

“Wait, Sokka,” Zuko says, burning hand grabbing Sokka’s cold one. The door closes behind Aang, leaving the two of them alone. Sokka turns, just as Zuko steps even closer. They’re barely even a foot apart and Sokka can hardly breath. “You’ve got morning class tomorrow, right?”

Sokka nods. He really hopes Zuko doesn’t notice that he keeps looking at his lips.

“Do you want to walk to class together? I can meet you outside your dorm.”

Sokka’s heart stops, then starts beating dangerously fast. Zuko wants to spend _more_ time with him?

“Definitely,” Sokka says, then realises, “wait. I need to drop my dad at the station tomorrow before class. Katara has an earlier class, so…”

“I can meet you at the station, if you want?”

Now Sokka’s heartbeat is _really_ going.

“Yeah, I’d like that,” he manages.

Zuko smiles, “See you tomorrow.”

After class, the five of them walk together across campus, looking for a good spot to sit and eat. With zero prompting, Zuko had brought lunch for all of them from the Jasmine Dragon, since he knew Katara and Aang had classes again straight after lunch, and that Sokka and Toph were planning to go to the library. He didn’t want them all to go hungry without the time to buy lunch, so he sorted it for them. Sokka doesn’t think people get better than that.

They find a nice patch of grass near the library, under the shade of a big tree. Despite the chill in the air, the sun is shining bright. It’ll probably be one of the last sunny days before winter really sets in. It’s something weird to get used to; back home, they’d be getting well into summer now, with only an hour or two of true darkness at night. It’s weird to Sokka having full nights of darkness. It’s _especially_ weird having the sun burning bright while the weather gets colder.

They all settle down into the grass, and Zuko hands out food. When he gives Sokka his, their fingertips touch. Sokka freezes, breath still. Was that an accident? The past week, they'd walked to class together every day, even if they didn't have the same classes. And every day, their hands would always brush as they walked. Sokka still hadn’t been able to decide if it was accidental or not, either. He couldn’t even figure out if _he_ were doing it on purpose or not, let alone Zuko.

“Mmm,” Sokka hums, digging into the meat and dumplings that Zuko had brought for him. He glances around at everyone’s food and notices a distinctly smaller amount of meat for everyone else. Two weeks and Zuko already knows the way to his heart. “This is amazing, did you make it?”

“With a lot of uncle’s help, yeah,” Zuko says, ducking his head. Sokka can’t help but picture Zuko working away in the kitchen with Iroh specifically to bring his friends food. His heart swells.

“I’m impressed,” Sokka says, continuing his feasting. He finishes in record time, while everyone else is still working through their food at a regular pace. Sokka lets out a satisfied sigh, lying back on the grass and staring at the sky through the branches of the tree. _This_ is happiness.

After a few minutes, he hears Zuko shifting and then he joins him lying on the grass. They’re so close that Sokka can hardly breath.

“Good food?” Zuko asks.

“ _Amazing_ food.”

“I never get over how gorgeous the sky is here,” Zuko says after a while.

“It’s not like this in the Fire Nation?” Sokka can barely believe he’s asking a question like that so easily.

“It’s never this clear,” Zuko explains, “on the smaller islands and villages, it’s better, but in cities the smoke can get so bad. You should see the Capital…”

“You’re from the Capital?” Sokka doesn’t know much about the Fire Nation, but from what he does know they don’t seem like the place to let just _any_ family live in the capital city.

“No,” Zuko says quickly, “no, uh, a small town. Hira’a. It's just outside of the Capital. We’d visit sometimes, though. Special events, festivals, things like that.”

“What’s it like?” Sokka asks.

“The Capital?”

“Hira’a.” Sokka’s not sure he’s _quite_ ready to hear about the Fire Lord’s home, just yet.

“It’s nice. We’ve got good theatre there. I miss it. I miss being home.”

Sokka shifts his hand so he’s touching Zuko’s, their pinkies just touching.

“Tell me about your home,” Zuko says, “what’s it like?”

“Well, I’m _actually_ from the Capital,” Sokka says with a small laugh, “it’s hardly the Capital any more though, just a small village really. It’s nice, though. I knew everyone. It was like a big family. All the adults had their part in raising me and Katara, and then we practically raised all their kids, too. I miss it.”

Zuko shifts his hand, wrapping his pinkie around Sokka’s. The point of heat curling around him grounds him, keeps him there. He looks up at the sky, at the clouds passing, the branches shifting gently in the wind, but he can’t feel anything but Zuko’s hand next to his.

“I recognise those clothes, they’re like…” Aang says, “Sokka, am I seeing that right?”

Sokka sits up, keeping his hand firmly against the ground with Zuko’s. “What?”

“Over there,” Aang points out, to a girl walking some distance away, “her clothes are familiar.”

“Wait…” Sokka says, squinting. He _does_ recognise those clothes. The girl gets closer, and Sokka can see the green kimono, armour and gold headdress. She’s not wearing her makeup, but he recognises her in a heartbeat anyway. He jumps up, tearing his hand away.

“SUKI!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact: i wrote this entire chapter while listening to the twilight soundtrack


	10. Chapter 10

Sokka practically sprints over to Suki, and she gets about one millisecond to recognise him before he’s barrelling into her, wrapping her in a hug and spinning her round. Sokka's missed the comfortable feeling of her in his arms. “Suki, it’s you!”

“Sokka, I didn’t know you were in Ba Sing Se,” Suki says, beaming at him when they finally separate. Sokka takes her in, her bare face and wide eyes. He hasn't seen her since she visited the South over a year ago.

“I’m at the university now, me and Katara just started this semester. What are you doing here?”

“Me and some of the girls are here visiting the Earth King,” Suki explains.

Sokka raises his eyebrows, “So you’re dealing with _royalty_ now?”

“It’s nothing interesting, honestly. Politics, probably,” Suki says, “I have no idea, he just ‘wanted to meet with the Kyoshi warriors’. Weird, right?”

“Weird,” Sokka agrees, then remembers he needs to show her off to the group, “you have to come meet everyone.”

Sokka grabs Suki’s hand and drags her over to their picnic area, four pairs of eyes watching them. He places Suki in front of the group proudly, “So, you know Katara.”

“Hi again,” Katara says with a smile.

“And this is Aang, my roommate, Toph, Katara’s roommate, and Zuko, our favourite tea-maker,” Sokka says, pointing round the group, “everyone, this is Suki. We met a few years ago when I was visiting Kyoshi Island.”

Sokka sits down where he is, pulling Suki down to sit with him. He wishes he could go sit back with Zuko, but there isn’t enough space there for two, and he wants to catch up with Suki. He notices Zuko’s hand still lying out on the grass and he aches to touch it, to hold it. Zuko closes his hand into a fist, moving it back to his body.

“You’re missing out the key part where I beat you up and got you to wear makeup,” Suki says.

The group laughs. All Sokka can hear is Zuko’s. He doesn’t notice he’s staring at him until he meets his eyes. Sokka looks away quickly.

“Hey, if a pretty girl tells me to put on makeup, I’ll do it.”

Suki rolls her eyes. “And a dress, too?”

“It’s a _warrior’s outfit_ , isn’t it?” Sokka teases.

“When I wear it, yes, but when you wear it, I’m not so sure.”

Katara sighs, “For everyone wondering, yes, they did date,” she says, “and yes, they were this annoying the first time around.”

Sokka’s sure he doesn’t imagine Zuko tensing up, back straightening and face closing off. He _must_ be imagining it, though, surely. Right?

“You’re just jealous,” Sokka teases Katara, “two gorgeous people like us, we were an unstoppable couple.”

Suki laughs, “You were the looks, I was the muscle.”

Sokka grins at her, “I’ve missed you,” he says, sincerely, “but I was the _brains_. We were both the looks, obviously,” he gestures at Suki’s face, as if anyone needs any more explanation.

“I’m confused,” Toph says, “why did you break up? You guys hardly seem...”

"Like exes?" Katara finishes, "I know."

Sokka puts a casual arm around Suki’s shoulders, “It wasn’t meant to be, lovers torn apart so young, so soon.”

Suki rolls her eyes, pushing Sokka’s arm off, “What Sokka _means_ is that he had to go home. Neither of us were about to commit to a relationship-by-letter, so we called it off.”

Sokka puts a hand to his chest, “A true tragedy of heartbreak and loss.” Suki laughs and shoves him hard enough that he nearly falls back against the grass.

Zuko clears his throat. Sokka looks over at him and he somehow looks even more tense than before. “I, uh, need to go,” he says, “I’ve got a…shift.”

“Wait, Zuko,” Sokka says, trying to grab him before he leaves, but he slips out of his reach, walking away quickly. _That_ was weird. Sokka watches after him, as he gets smaller and further away. He wants to go after him, to tell him to bunk off his shift and hang out with him more. But…it’s too late. He’ll go round to the Jasmine Dragon later and check on him.

Aang touches Sokka’s arm, bringing him back to the moment. “Is Suki the Kyoshi Warrior you told me about? Like the woman…”

“Oh, yeah,” Sokka says, trying to push down the thoughts of Zuko’s weird behaviour, “Suki, we have a puzzle for you.”

Suki nods, “Hit me.”

“Aang…”

“I keep getting these visions,” Aang explains, “in my dreams, meditations, sometimes when I’m awake. All these different people trying to talk to me, to tell me something, but I can’t figure it out. I can’t really see them properly, but Sokka recognised one of them as a Kyoshi Warrior.”

“Do you know what she looked like? Maybe I know her,” Suki offers.

“Not much,” Aang says, “it’s like…they’re distant and blurry. She has long brown hair, is dressed…well, like you, and is, uh, really, really tall.”

Suki frowns, “That sounds like Avatar Kyoshi herself, really.”

“Wait, what?” Katara says.

“She started the Kyoshi Warriors, our armour and fight styles are based off of hers. And she’s really, really tall. Like, seven feet tall.”

“Wow,” Sokka says.

“That doesn’t make sense,” Aang says, “why would an old avatar be trying to contact me?”

“How long until Gyatso gets here?” Katara asks.

“He’s coming next week, I think.”

“I think you need to talk to him.”

“Weird about the avatar stuff, right?” Sokka says, walking with Suki through the city.

“Really weird,” Suki agrees, “I mean, if Aang is somehow in contact with Kyoshi, I can’t say I’m not jealous.”

Sokka raises his eyebrows, “Jealous, huh?”

Suki rolls her eyes. “She was an amazing woman. I’d do anything to even be able to just sit down and have a conversation with her.”

“If you want, I can put on your dress again and wear some high heels.”

Suki shoves Sokka, but laughs, “You’re so annoying, you know that?”

Sokka grins, “I know. But you like me, nonetheless.”

“Riiiiight,” Suki teases.

“How long until your meeting?”

“Not long, I don’t really know if I can stop…”

“Come on, just quick. Just a drink.”

“Sokka…”

“ _Suki_.”

Suki sighs. “Fine. One drink.”

They duck into the Jasmine Dragon. Inside, Zuko is behind the counter and Iroh is serving people. Sokka walks straight up the counter, smiling at Zuko. It waivers when he gets nothing back from Zuko, not even one of his small smiles he seems to reserve just for Sokka. Zuko looks up at him, glancing quickly between Sokka and Suki. His eyes rest on Sokka for a moment, eyes sad, before he looks away again.

“Two of your finest teas, please,” Sokka says, trying not to let it faze him.

“Okay, sit down and I’ll bring it your table soon,” Zuko says, as if they’re just regular customers, nothing more. Sokka’s confidence dips. What’s going on?

He and Suki find a table, but Sokka can’t help but keep looking back at Zuko. He doesn’t return the looks.

“Everything alright?” Suki asks, putting a hand over Sokka’s. He remembers when a simple touch like that from her would’ve driven him mad. He’s glad that they were together when they were; it’s set them up for a comfortable friendship. He’s wondered multiple times what would’ve happened if they had more time together, or if they lived closer together – would they have stayed a couple? Would everything be different? But now, with her hand on his, all he can think about is the same touch from Zuko and how different that felt. Maybe things would’ve been different, but definitely not with Zuko around. Sokka glances back at him again. He’s never felt like this with a friend.

“Something’s up with Zuko. He’s being weird, right?”

Suki shrugs, “I don’t really know the guy, what’s he normally like?”

“I don’t know…not this.”

Suki smiles, gentle and careful. “Talk to him, I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

Sokka glances back, again. His neck’ll start hurting in a minute. This time, he’s fast enough to catch Zuko staring at the back of his head. He holds his gaze for a minute, then Zuko’s face clouds over and he looks away. When Sokka looks back, Suki has moved to the seat next to him.

“You like him, don’t you?” she whispers, leaning in close. She smells familiar, like sea salt, metal and cherry blossoms.

Sokka tries, unsuccessfully, to hide his red cheeks. _Does he?_

“I like spending time with him.”

Suki raises one eyebrow, “It seems like a lot more than just that.”

“It’s…we’re just good friends.”

“Yeah, right. Remember, I’ve been on the receiving end of _this-_ ” she waves a finger in his direction, “you’re not subtle.”

Zuko clears his throat, stood over the two of them, and Sokka realises how close he and Suki are sat, leaning into one another. Zuko puts down the tray of tea.

“Here’s your tea,” he mumbles, already making to leave.

“Wait,” Sokka says. Zuko turns but doesn’t come back. “Is everything okay?”

Zuko nods. “Enjoy your tea.”

“Why won’t Zuko speak to me? I don’t get it, what have I done wrong?”

Toph stares for a moment, then pulls the skin of her eye down to show off nearly her entire eyeball, rolling it in a jerky motion. “Am I doing this right?”

“If I say yes, will you never do that again?” Sokka had come to Katara’s room for advice after walking with Suki to her meeting, but only found Toph. He regrets staying for Toph’s advice instead of hunting Katara down.

“I thought _I_ was supposed to be the blind one around here,” Toph says.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Zuko?” Toph says his name like it’s obvious what this all means, “You’re an idiot, you know that?"

"What did I do?"

"Zuko’s _jealous_. He saw you and Suki together and he’s worried he’s second to her.”

“Why would he be worried about that? Me and Suki were friends a _long_ time ago…”

“I don’t think it’s friendship he’s worried about, dumbass,” she says, with a hit to the back of Sokka’s head. _Ow._

“But…” Sokka’s brain is slow moving, filled with tar. He’d been trying hard enough to wrap his head around whether or not he had feelings for Zuko. He hadn’t even _considered_ Zuko having them back. There’s no way, he and Zuko are just friends. Why would he even _want_ anything more? “You’re wrong.”

Toph sighs. “I’m never wrong, it’s so obvious.”

“Obvious _how_? I’ve never seen him doing anything to suggest it!”

“Obvious in _every way_. How about the fact that every time you two are close, _especially_ every time you two touch, his heart rate goes mad? Or the fact that he’s always looking at you, his entire _body_ is always angled towards you? And, oh yeah, as soon as he heard you and Suki were exes, he got awkward and ran away moody as quickly as possible?”

“You’re…misreading things.”

“I _don’t_ misread things.”

Sokka sighs. “Okay, let’s say you’re right,” he offers, even though he far from believes what Toph’s saying. He can feel the hope deep inside him at the prospect of Zuko _liking_ him, but he doesn’t want to get his hopes up. Toph has to be wrong. “What do I do? How do I fix this?”

Toph rolls her eyes again, more fluid this time. “Talk to him, idiot. Tell him you _loooove_ him.”

“Ugh.” Sokka pushes Toph’s face away from him, “Fine, I’ll try.”

Sokka stands up, completely ready to go hunt Zuko down right then and there.

“Wait,” Toph says, “give him the night. Whenever my parents would piss me off, I’d always need the night to cool off. Give him time to sleep it off.”

Sokka sighs. It makes sense, and it’s probably the smart thing to do, but he knows it’ll kill him having to wait the entire night not knowing whether or not Zuko hates him. But he supposes he’ll have to suffer.

Sokka wakes up to Aang’s scream, and they both jolt upright in their beds. Sokka rubs his eyes, squinting from the low light streaming into the room.

“Everything okay?” he asks.

Aang is still breathing heavily. He rubs the back of his head. “I had the weirdest dream.”

“More weird people trying to talk to you?”

“No, not this time. There was…a spirit. A _big_ spirit. It was attacking me.”

“Woah, spooky.”

“There was another spirit there, too. A light one. I was defending it. And then I…fused with it? I don’t know, it was weird.”

Sokka pulls a face, “Sounds kinda gross.”

“It felt like a message, but…I don’t understand what it’s supposed to mean. What do they want me to do?”

“Go to the spirit world and pick a fight with the scariest looking one?”

Aang frowns. “That’s honestly the closest idea I’ve got."

Sokka smiles sympathetically. He feels bad for the kid. His eyes are ringed with deep circles, the tiredness obvious in the way he holds himself. It’s all really taking a toll on him, and Sokka wishes he could help, but he’s the last guy to come to for all that spiritual nonsense.

“I’m gonna try meditating on it,” Aang says, sitting up properly and closing his eyes again. For a moment, Sokka’s _swears_ his tattoos look like they’re almost glowing, but, no, that’s not right. It’s the light, the golden glow of the sunrise shining against his skin.

Looking out the window at the sun low in the sky, it’s beams filling the room with liquid gold, only makes Sokka start thinking about Zuko again. He gets up and stands by the window, looking out at the sun. It’s only just starting to poke over the horizon, illuminating the clouds in the exact colour of Zuko’s eyes. Sokka’s heart aches to talk to him, to be near him. Sokka takes a deep breath and lets it out in a slow sigh. He curses Toph for being right. Of _course_ she was right. Sokka is well and truly head over heels and he’s somehow only just noticing this now. He wants nothing more than to be with Zuko, close to him forever. He imagines telling Zuko how he feels, and a wave of excitement fills him. _Nothing_ is stopping him. 

But…Zuko’s mad at him. He thinks. He looks out at the sun and knows Zuko will be out the back of the Jasmine Dragon, doing his exercises. He wishes he were with him.

He can be, Sokka realises. He goes every morning for breakfast, why should this morning be any different? With a renewed sense of excitement, Sokka gets dressed, quickly throwing on any old clothes. He needs to see Zuko as soon as possible. Now that he realises how he feels about him, he _has_ to tell him. Maybe Zuko won’t feel the same, or he’ll still be mad, or whatever, but Sokka has to tell him.

He nearly ends up running to the Jasmine Dragon and shows up at the door breathless. It’s unlocked, as it has been every morning since he made it a habit to come for breakfast early.

“Good morning, Sokka!” Iroh greets him with a smile, sat at one of the tables dealing with some paperwork.

“Is Zuko out back?” Sokka gets straight to the point.

“Yes, he’s still doing his exercises, he’ll be through in a moment, I’m sure,” Iroh says. Sokka normally waits for Zuko to finish with Iroh, but today he can’t wait that long. He needs to see him _now_.

“Can I go through now and find him?” Sokka asks, with enough forced patience to avoid barging straight through Iroh’s shop.

“He prefers not to be disturbed, but…” Iroh looks at Sokka’s pleading face. He clasps his hands together for added effect. Iroh smiles, “I’m sure he won’t mind, as it’s you.”

Sokka tries not to read too much into that.

He goes through the kitchen and pushes through the back door, excitement blanketing all nerves. He opens the door straight into a burst of flames shooting past it, and he steps back, hesitant, a wave of anxiety rising in his chest. Maybe he should’ve thought through the _firebending_ part of this more.

The flames clear, and Zuko spots Sokka, eyes going wide. Sokka can barely even register the look on Zuko’s face, because _Zuko is shirtless_. Sokka feels the heat rising to his own face, and he tries so, so hard not to stare. It’s difficult. Zuko looks incredible, naturally, because life is never easy for Sokka, but seeing him like this makes him feel sick with worry, too. Of course, Sokka had seen the scar on his face, and noticed the faint scarring down his arm and hand, but this…Zuko’s neck, chest, and shoulder are a scorched, angry red, fading to pink across his stomach and forearm. What happened to him? Sokka looks back up at Zuko’s face, and it looks just as red as Sokka’s feels. He pulls his shirt on quickly.

“Uh, hi,” Zuko says.

“Hi,” Sokka says, “I wanted to see you, check up on you. You seemed…not okay yesterday.”

“It’s nothing,” Zuko shrugs unconvincingly. He comes and sits on the steps leading to the back door. Sokka sits next to him, keeping a painful distance between them. “Suki seems nice,” Zuko says after a moment.

“She’s great,” Sokka agrees.

“Have you two gotten back together?” Zuko asks, and La, does Toph have to be right about this, too?

“What? What gives you that idea?”

“You two just seemed…happy together. And if you only broke up because you had to leave…”

“No, Zuko,” Sokka says, “we were together a long time ago. She’s incredible, and one of my best friends, but we’ve both moved on with our lives. It was fun while it lasted, but it wasn’t meant to be.”

“Really?” Zuko looks at Sokka, eyes hopeful.

“Really,” Sokka answers, meeting his gaze. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get sick of seeing Zuko up close, like this. How could he not fall for the guy?

Zuko looks away from the intensity of Sokka’s gaze, but Sokka still can’t tear his eyes away. He watches the way Zuko’s hair falls down, covering parts of his face. He notices how his scar trails under his collar, remembering the true expanse of it. Sokka finds himself subconsciously leaning closer, taking in all the details of Zuko all over again. The milky white of his eye, his thick, dark hair, the pale skin contrasting with his scar and hair. All over, he’s sharp, strong features, contrasting and powerful. It makes Sokka feel dull in comparison.

Zuko flinches when he feels Sokka’s breath on his cheek, turning to face him. They’re barely inches away, and Sokka refuses to move back.

Zuko frowns. “What are you doing?”

“Just…looking,” Sokka says, “you couldn’t see me?”

“Not really,” Zuko says, “you’d have to come really close for that.”

“So, like,” Sokka says, “okay, say when.” He takes Zuko’s chin gently in his hand, turning it back to facing straight ahead. Slowly, he leans in closer and closer.

“Sokka, I’m blind, you’re gonna have to come completely in front of me to-” Zuko starts, turning back to face Sokka, but he’s already _so_ close. Their noses brush past one another, and they’re staring right at each other, breath mingling and eyes pouring into each other.

“Zuko…” Sokka says, not knowing where he’s going with it. He wants to tell him everything, how he felt sick thinking he’d annoyed him yesterday, how for the past two weeks he hasn’t wanted to do anything but be next to him, how he woke up this morning desperate to see him as he does every morning, how he sees his eyes in the sun and that they're the only light he could ever need. But those aren’t just things you can put into words like that.

“Sokka,” Zuko replies, a full sentence in itself. Sokka could listen to Zuko say his name for the rest of eternity and it wouldn’t be enough.

The air between them feels electric, poised for something to happen. Sokka makes miniscule movements forward, delaying the inevitable just for a moment more of looking into Zuko's eyes. He takes a deep breath, ready to make the leap when the door clicks open behind them, a rush of air hitting the two of them. They jump apart, trying to retain a semblance of normality as Iroh looks down at them. He doesn’t seem convinced.

“Your breakfast is ready,” he says, with a small, all knowing smile, “I’ll see you inside in a minute,” he adds, closing the door again.

“We should, ah, go…eat,” Zuko says, avoiding Sokka’s eyes. Never has Sokka wished to be able to go back in time more, to be able to recapture that moment, to _finish what they started_. But Zuko’s already standing up, awkwardly shuffling his feet waiting for Sokka to join him. He stands with a sigh and Zuko doesn’t meet his eyes. Maybe he misread the situation. He really, _really_ hopes not. He watches Zuko’s back as they go back into the shop. Okay, the moments well and truly gone. Back to normal it is.


	11. Chapter 11

In class, Sokka is sat next to Zuko and it just about kills him. For the entire hour, all he can think about is that moment this morning, both of them waiting for _something_ to happen. Zuko hasn’t brought it up, so Sokka avoids the subject, afraid that he completely misinterpreted the signs.

Their professor is talking, but Sokka misses all of it. How is he supposed to pay attention when he can feel Zuko’s heat next to him, radiating off of him? When he can smell his smoky, floral scent, like willow and wisteria. How’s he supposed to pay attention when he can spend the entire class trying to read Zuko’s thoughts, instead?

Every now and then, Sokka scribbles some nonsense to seem like he’s paying attention, even though it’s really an excuse to bump his elbow against Zuko’s arm, to feel that brief connection.

“You’re lefthanded?” Zuko whispers, after another elbow bump.

Sokka shrugs, “I can write with either,” he whispers back, deliberately excluding the fact that he normally writes with his right hand, but Zuko happens to be sat on his left side today, “I trained to use two weapons as a kid, so I sorta picked up both.”

Zuko smiles, “Me too, I trained with dual swords,” he says, “I always started writing lefthanded as a kid, but my dad said that wasn’t the _proper_ way to do things, so he had me taught to write with my other hand. After that, two swords were what felt right.”

Wow, Zuko’s dad still sounds like an asshole. Zuko looks back at his notes, and Sokka doesn’t want the conversation to end _that_ quickly, even if they are in the middle of class. “Are you any good?”

Zuko ducks his head, “I think I’m pretty good.”

“You should show me, one day,” Sokka suggests, “we could _spar_.” Sokka’s eyes widen in excitement, imagining it. Everyone always does bending things, but no one’s ever willing to throw around a sword with him. When Sokka pictures it, Zuko definitely has a shirt on. Definitely.

Sokka can tell Zuko is still trying to pay attention to their professor, but he glances at Sokka from the side of his eye, “One day,” he says, with a small smile. For now, that’s enough.

Zuko goes back to working, and Sokka goes back to imagining how his lips would taste.

He hardly even realises when the class ends, halfway through thinking about Zuko a little too much.

“Hey,” Zuko says, packing away his stuff, “do you have another class now?”

Stirred out of his daydream, Sokka starts shoving everything haphazardly into his bag. Aang and Katara are already ahead of the game, packed up and stood in front of their desk. “Uh, yeah,” he says, “I’ve got an hour one with Toph, then a lunch break. Are you guys going to the tree after your class?”

“Yeah, right?” Aang says, glancing between Katara and Zuko for approval. They both nod. “Yeah.”

Sokka smiles, “Suki might come find us, too. See you in an hour.”

When Sokka gets to his next class, Toph is already there with an empty seat next to her. He slumps down into it, slamming his head against the desk in front.

“So, I’m guessing it went well with lover boy?”

“Ugh.”

“What happened? You confessed your love and he laughed?”

“No, worse,” Sokka mumbles.

“He…disowned you?”

Sokka lifts his head. “I went to talk to him,” he explains, “and I didn’t _say_ anything, but we were going to kiss. I think. We were _so close_ , Toph. And then we were interrupted, and he just continued on as if nothing had happened. Did I just, like, make it all up entirely? And I just had an hour of class with him and _nothing_ , not a _single_ word about it.” He drops his head back to the table. “This is torture.”

Toph pats his gently on the back. “You’re a drama queen,” she says, “why don’t you just, simply… _tell him how you feel_?”

Sokka groans. “It’s not that _easy_.”

“It _is_ that easy.”

“What if he doesn’t feel the same?”

“Then you suck it up and start trying to move on instead of pining over someone that doesn’t like you.”

“I hate it when you make sense.”

“I know.”

Sokka turns his head to look at Toph. “Do I really have to?”

“Yes. If you don’t do it by the end of the week, I’ll do it myself.”

“The _end of the week_? That’s in, like, three days.”

“Which means you’ll have plenty of opportunities to tell him.”

“I hate you.”

Toph just grins.

“Wait, so you’re trying to tell me that if you had to pick _one_ food, one _single_ food to have for the _rest of your life_ , it would be _egg custard tart_?” Sokka questions Aang, at another Zuko-supplied picnic after class, his back against the tree and stomach happily full. “There’s not even any meat in it!”

“He’s a vegetarian, Sokka,” Katara says, unimpressed.

“You can’t talk, seaweed girl.”

“It’s versatile! I’m thinking practically, here.”

Sokka waves her off, not wanting to hear it. “Suki, tell me you have some sense.”

Suki frowns, thinking for a moment, “Sushi, probably. I haven’t thought about it much, to be honest.”

Sokka nods, “I’ll allow that.”

“Oh, _will_ you?” Suki retorts, “How kind of you. Thank you, master Sokka, for allowing me to eat what I want.”

Zuko snorts, and Sokka glares at him. “Okay, what about you, _Zuko_? Impress me.”

“So, we’re supposed to be impressing you now? Zuko, just tell him you’ll have a lump of indiscriminate meat and he’ll swoon,” Suki says. She and Zuko share a look and Sokka misses when Zuko ran away at the sight of Suki.

“Probably, like, Komodo chicken or something,” Zuko says.

Sokka squints at him, “Are you trying to suck up to me or something?” Zuko pulls an innocent face, “I’ve never had it, but it sounds like I’d like it.”

“Wow, shocker,” Toph says, “Sokka thinks he’ll like meat.”

The entire group laughs, and Sokka crosses him arms. “I’m a simple man who enjoys the simple pleasures in life, so sue me.”

Zuko smiles at him and touches his arm gently, “I like that about you.” Zuko looks at his as though the two of them are entirely alone and it sends Sokka’s stomach into somersaults. Does Zuko count as a simple pleasure?

“Ah, shit, what time is it? Toph I think we need to go to class,” Sokka says, realising how long they’ve been sat there.

“I’ve got class, too,” Zuko says, “I’ll walk with you guys.”

Sokka tries to hide the very obvious smile desperately trying to break out. Zuko and Toph both stand up and grab their things, but Sokka lingers, appreciating his relaxing, reclined position and full stomach.

“Come on, meat boy, we’ll be late,” Toph says.

Zuko sticks a hand out for him, with a small smile. Sokka takes it, using Zuko’s support to pull him up, except Toph decides to also bring the earth underneath him up to send him flying up and crashing into Zuko’s arms. There’s a moment where they’re both upright, then Zuko’s tumbling backwards, Sokka with him. He lands on top of Zuko, bodies pressed flat against on another. Sokka’s fairly sure his heart stops beating entirely.

Time slows down, and for that moment it’s just the two of them, mere inches away from each other’s faces. Sokka stares into his eyes, getting lost in the gold and the white. His lips are so close, parted ever so slightly. It would be so easy for Sokka to lean forward and close the distance between them.

Katara clears her throat and Sokka scrambles to get off of Zuko quickly, remembering that he’s quite literally lying on top of him in front of all their friends. He manages to get off and stand up without making too much of a fool of himself. When he looks back at Zuko, he’s brushing himself off, face bright red. Did Sokka entirely misread that again?

Toph’s face is plastered with a smug grin. Sokka kicks her on the way past.

Sokka walks home alone after his classes are over for the day, taking a detour to collect some books from the library, then heading back to the dorm. He’s about to pass a group of Fire Nation students, and it takes him a moment to process who’s _in_ that group. Zuko towers over the three girls he’s with, the three he’s seen him with before. His heart freezes in his chest. He knows one of them is his sister, but could one be his girlfriend? He and the moody girl seemed really close at the party. Sokka feels like an idiot.

He avoids Zuko’s gaze. He’s gotten used to Zuko being Fire Nation, but he doesn’t know how well he can handle _more_ Fire Nation people. Especially his sister. Regardless, Zuko spots him and Sokka sees him elbowing the moody girl. She glances over at Sokka and gives him a once-over, then starts talking to Azula, directing her attention away from Sokka. That’s…weird.

Zuko comes over, smiling at Sokka. He’ll never get tired of that smile. “Hey, how was class?”

Sokka shrugs, “The usual, you?”

Zuko matches his movement, “The usual,” he says, then glances behind him at his group again.

“You can get back to them, I’ve got to go home and work, anyway.”

“No, sorry, it’s just, uh…Azula, my sister,” Zuko says, “Mai said she’d distract her for me, but…”

Right. Mai. His girlfriend.

“Distract her?”

“Not in a way that’s, like, I’m trying to hide your existence from my family. I’m not. I mean, Azula, maybe. But not in that way. You’ve met my uncle, so it’s not- I mean,” Zuko sighs, “Azula is an asshole. You saw what she was like with Katara…I don’t want her to be an asshole to you, too. But I do want to introduce you to my family. Like, I’m not ashamed to be friends with you, or trying to hide you, I just, uh, you know, my family is…my _family_. But my uncle is good. And you know him. So, it’s…yeah.”

Sokka laughs, filled with a burst of warmth towards Zuko. “That made no sense.”

“Sorry, I- uh…Azula-”

“No, no,” Sokka interrupts, waving his hands and laughing, “I know what you’re trying to say. It’s fine, really.”

“Really?”

“Really,” Sokka says with a smile. Zuko glances back at his group, and he and Mai share a look. The smile falls off of Sokka’s face. She’s gorgeous, so he can’t really blame Zuko, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting a bit. Okay, more than a bit.

Zuko looks back. “Do you want to come round later? You could have dinner at the Jasmine Dragon? Or something like that.”

Sokka wants to say yes, his whole heart is begging him to say yes, but once glance at Mai helps logic override his foolish heart. “I should really do some work; I’ve got loads to do.”

“We could study together, if you bring your stuff over.”

It kills Sokka to say it, to even think it, but he forces it out. “I really can’t, I’m sorry.”

Zuko’s disappointment is obvious, and it only kills Sokka more. “Oh, okay, that’s fine. I’ll see you tomorrow morning, though?”

Sokka can’t bear to say no to that one, not now, not ever. “Always.”

Sokka sits on the doorstep, watching Zuko’s movements. The way his muscles tense and pull with each punch, kick, and fluid movement. The way the flames burst out of him, like an extension of his body, another limb he can easily control.

The anxiety is still there, feeling the heat of the flames, watching them dance in front of his eyes. It still reminds him of unpleasant memories, but…it’s different. Sokka starts to appreciate the beauty in it, too, the art of Zuko’s movements. The skill and obvious dedication that has gone into it. The change feels monumental.

Zuko finishes his exercises with a bow to the sun. When he turns around, he freezes as soon as he sees Sokka.

“Sokka…I didn’t know you were there, I- uh. Sorry. For firebending, I shouldn’t-”

“It’s fine,” Sokka interrupts, “really. I’m getting used to it.”

Zuko smiles and joins him on the step, wiping his face with a towel. Sokka very much notices how he doesn’t put his shirt back on.

“You’re really good, you know,” Sokka says, “I mean, I know nothing about bending, but I can tell that much.”

“Really?” Zuko asks, a small smile on his lips, “I was never really considered good in my family.”

“ _How?_ That was all insane.”

Zuko shrugs. “Everyone in my family were prodigies. My father, my sister, my uncle… I’ve come from two long lines of powerful benders, so my father always saw me as a disappointment. Always said Azula was born lucky, I was lucky to be born,” he says, with a short, bitter laugh.

Sokka doesn’t even know what to say; he tries to picture those words coming from his own father’s mouth, but it’s impossible to even imagine. Anger boils in Sokka’s blood at the thought of how Zuko’s been treated by his family, from what little he knows.

“I’m sorry, Zuko,” he says, barely a whisper, “he sounds like an asshole.”

Zuko doesn’t say anything, bringing the towel and rubbing is over his head, drying the sweat from his hair. When he pulls it away, his hair is sticking up in all directions and Sokka can’t help but laugh.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Sokka says, between more laughs only fuelled by the confused look on Zuko’s face, “just your hair,” he explains, reaching over to smooth it down without even thinking about it. He processes what he’s doing as soon as he touches Zuko’s hair, the silky weight of it, flattening it back down. Zuko doesn’t move away or try to resist, so he lets his hand fall down to Zuko’s neck, holding his there gently. He _knows_ it’s inappropriate and he shouldn’t be doing this, but he can’t resist. Every touch with Zuko feels like this is where he’s always been meant to be.

Zuko opens his mouth to say something, but changes his mind, closing it again. He leans forward ever so slightly, until their foreheads are resting together. The connection of Zuko’s burning skin against Sokka’s cool skin sends shivers down his spine. This is the closest they’ve ever been, foreheads and noses together, lips _so close_. Sokka wants to make that lunge, push himself forward to close the distance between them and finally, _finally_ make it happen. He needs to.

But…he remembers yesterday. Mai. Sure, he’s never spoken about her, but how much does Sokka really know about him? It makes sense. Why would someone like Zuko be single?

Zuko, whose eyes are pouring into his, staring at him in a way he can’t quite decipher. Who he hasn’t been able to spend even a day apart from since they became friends. Who he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about, long before they were even friends. When he pulls away, it feels like ripping his heart out of his chest, but he knows it’s the right thing to do. He avoids looking at Zuko, instead staring down at his shoes, not wanting Zuko to see the sadness on his face. He glances quickly to the side, and Zuko looks…upset? Has Sokka done something wrong? He’s so confused, he doesn’t know what’s right and what’s wrong anymore. He doesn’t know how to behave around Zuko, how to do any of it.

With a sigh, he stands up, breaking both of them out of their trance. “We should go inside, eat some food.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” Zuko says, avoiding Sokka’s eyes as he turns and goes inside without a single look back. Yeah, Sokka did the right thing.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I pretty much wrote this chapter and the last alongside one another, and couldn't resist uploading it almost immediately, whoops sorry I'm impatient.  
> Also, sorry for this

Sokka avoids meeting the others for lunch, knowing it’ll just kill him to see Zuko. So, he buys some food from a stand in the city, then eats it alone in his room. He feels miserable, but he knows if he spends another minute with Zuko, knowing that he has no chance with him, it’ll just make him even more miserable. He almost wishes he hadn’t made up with Zuko, so he didn’t have to feel like this. He was perfectly happy hating the guy. He can live with hate. Hate is easy. _This_ …isn’t.

“Where the hell were you?” Toph asks when they meet for their afternoon class, arms crossed and stern.

Sokka shakes his head, “I was in my room, I couldn’t…”

“Zuko was miserable without you,” Toph says. But it’s not the _same_ misery. Zuko missed his friend. Sokka ached for all that would never come. It’s different.

“I don’t know why.”

“You know why.”

“He has a girlfriend.”

Toph looks shocked, for once. “No way.”

“I’m sure of it, there’s this girl, Mai, and…”

“So, you don’t _know_.”

“It’s obvious, Toph.”

Toph shrugs, “What’s obvious is how _obsessed_ he is with you. He wouldn’t shut up about you at lunch. I mean, none of us did. We all missed you. Even if he has a girlfriend, you’re not ditching the group because of it.”

“It’s so hard to see him and-”

“I don’t care,” Toph interrupts, “you’re _not_ ditching us, end of.”

“But-”

“No. You’re not getting rid of us that easily. Promise, right now.”

“Toph-”

“ _Promise._ ”

“Okay, okay, I promise I won’t ditch you guys.”

“Good. I can force Zuko out of the group if you really want. I can be very hostile if I need to be.”

That gets a laugh out of Sokka, the weight easing ever so slightly off his shoulders. “Only when you need to be?”

Toph elbows him, _hard_ , but she laughs with him, and just for a moment, he forgets about Zuko.

With the rest of his afternoon free of classes, Sokka decides to spend it in the library, mostly wanting to hide away from everyone, but also in dire need of getting work done. He tries so hard to focus but it’s nearly impossible with thoughts of Zuko popping up any time he starts to get anything done. Zuko’s eyes, Zuko’s firebending, Zuko’s lips, the feeling of Zuko’s forehead against his own, the light warmth from his breath brushing Sokka’s lips. It’s more difficult than it should be.

“Hey, Sokka,” Aang’s voice appears out of nowhere, behind Sokka’s shoulder, “mind if I sit?”

Sokka reluctantly nods, and Aang pulls out a chair across the table.

“Suki has been helping me look into Avatar Kyoshi, to see if anything makes sense with any of my visions,” he says, dropping a pile of books on the table, “but we’ve had no luck so far with any of it. Gyatso should be here next week, so hopefully he’ll be able to help, but still…it’s weird.”

“Definitely weird,” Sokka agrees, “I wish I could help, but I’m not exactly the guy to turn to about all this spiritual stuff.”

“I mean, if you feel like going through any of these books about Kyoshi to look for things about weird dark spirits, that’s my mission for today,” Aang says.

Sokka looks between his work and Aang’s pile of books. He _really_ should get his work done, but he could also really use a distraction right now, which his work isn’t providing, at all. He takes one of Aang’s books and starts skimming through it.

It works to distract him for a bit, kind of, but thoughts of Zuko keep popping up.

“Aang, you know Zuko pretty well, right?” he finally asks, ready to broach the topic that’s been eating at him all day.

Aang shrugs, “He doesn’t talk about himself much, but yeah, I guess so.”

“Has he ever mentioned a girlfriend?” Sokka asks, “Or this girl…Mai?”

Aang frowns. “Mai sounds familiar, I think she’s one of his sister’s friends, but he’s only really mentioned her as a friend. He’s _definitely_ never specifically mentioned a girlfriend. I always thought he liked you, to be honest.”

“Wait, really?” Everyone couldn’t be misreading the signs, could they?

“I mean, the way he acts around you. It seems pretty obvious.”

“I just thought he thought we were good friends.”

“Me and Zuko are friends, and he’s never looked at me the way he looks at you.”

Sokka ducks his head to hide his blush. Maybe he’s been wrong. Maybe Mai is just a friend, and Zuko _does_ feel the same. Maybe. He needs to talk to Zuko, to _tell_ him, finally, how he feels. He feels excitement blooming in him at the prospect of it. He could go to the Jasmine Dragon tonight, find Zuko, and _tell_ him. It could be that easy.

“Sokka?” Aang asks, interrupting his best-case-scenario daydream.

“Hmm?”

“Do you think…” Aang hesitates, looking away, “I know she’s your sister, but…do you think Katara would, do you think Katara _could_ …like me?”

“Aang, I know Katara better than I know myself, and there is no way she doesn’t like you.”

“You really think?”

“Definitely.”

Aang smiles to himself, and Sokka feels happy for him, but also a burst of jealousy. He wishes it were that easy for him. He takes a deep breath, trying to correct his mindset. No. It _will_ be that easy for him. He’s going to find Zuko and tell him how he feels. Even if Zuko doesn’t feel the same way. He _has_ to tell him, he has to know, one way or another.

“Okay, I think I’m done for the day,” Sokka says, closing the book, “I’m not finding anything in here.”

Aang sighs, “Yeah, I’ve gotten nowhere.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’m sure Gyatso will know what’s going on, just relax until he gets here.”

Aang doesn’t look ready to relax, but he closes his books up. It’s a start.

“I’m gonna go see Zuko, but you should head home. Stop searching for the day.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right,” Aang says, packing his stuff away. Sokka shoves his things into his bag, and they start heading in the direction of their dorm and the Jasmine Dragon.

Sokka isn’t really paying attention to where he’s going, talking to Aang, and distracted by their conversation. He notices Aang’s eyes dart away and confusion cloud his face. Sokka turns too, and sees a girl stalking towards them, visibly tense and angry. She gets closer and Sokka starts to recognise her. Zuko’s _sister_?

“YOU,” she says, pointing a finger at Sokka when she gets close. As soon as she’s in range, she draws her hands up, conjuring two bright, blue flames in each hand. In one swift movement, she throws one forward, then the other in quick succession. Sokka feels the heat burst towards him and tries to dodge out of the way. Luckily, Aang steps in with a blast of air, sending the flames to the side in a burst of red.

Azula sends Aang a quick death stare, before focusing her attention back on Sokka.

“ _You_ ,” she repeats.

“Me?”

“Stay away from Zuko.”

“Why’s that any of your business?”

“Be _cause_ ,” she emphasises, “Zuko may be a useless pain in the ass, but he still shouldn’t be concerning himself with a _savage_ like you.”

Sokka feels anger bubbling up inside him. _This_ is who he should’ve been taking his anger at the Fire Nation out on. He steps forward, getting closer to her and sensing Aang’s immediate anxiety.

“It’s none of your business who Zuko spends his time with.”

“It’s exactly my business, because apparently he can’t think for himself anymore, what a shocker. He was never the smartest, must get it from our mother.”

“ _Don’t_ talk about him like that.” Sokka steps even closer, as does Azula. He can feel the heat radiating off of her, can smell the smoke coming from her hands.

“I’ll do what I want, thanks, _snow savage._ ”

“ _Ash maker._ ”

“Okay, okay,” Aang interjects, trying to separate the two of them gently. They take a few steps back.

“I won’t let him do it, you know,” Azula says, “he makes _stupid_ mistakes like our mother, like falling in love with peasants that aren’t worth his time when there’s people of _much_ higher stature he should be focusing on instead.”

Wait. _Love_?

Azula laughs at Sokka’s dumbfounded expression.

“Don’t worry, it won’t be for long, I’ll make him see sense. As if royalty should be spending time with a water peasant like you.”

Sokka’s sure his brain has short-circuited, first hearing _love_ , and now _royalty_? He can’t make the connection between anything Azula’s saying, any time he tries all he gets is fuzz. “Wait, what do you mean, royalty?”

Azula laughs again, harsh. “Oh, he didn’t tell you? That’s just like Zuko, to be ashamed of who he is. Or maybe it’s _you_ he’s ashamed of.”

“ _What_ ,” Sokka starts, taking another step forward and grabbing Azula by her shirt, “ _are you talking about?_ ”

“You really want to know?” Azula asks, pouting sarcastically. Sokka desperately wants to punch her. She pushes Sokka’s hand away and takes a step back. “Ever noticed why Zuko doesn’t talk about his family? Why he and our uncle live in the _Earth Kingdom_ , not the Fire Nation? I bet he hasn’t even explained his _scar_.”

Sokka steps forward, ready to grab Azula again, but she dodges him easily, smirking at his attempts.

“He’s the _prince_ , you see, dear Sokka.”

“Prince?”

She’s lying.

“The prince. Son of Fire Lord Ozai. Heir to the throne.”

_No._

She’s _lying._

“You’re lying.”

Azula laughs. “Wow, who taught you that one? You sound _just_ like Zuzu.”

“You’re _lying._ ”

“Oh, you wish, don’t you? Sorry, I’m not lying, this time. Check any book. Ask any firebender. Prince Zuko is _very_ well known in our nation. That is, if you’re older than seven. Maybe not so much anymore.”

Sokka feels as though the ground has dropped out from underneath him. It’s _impossible_ , but…it makes sense. Zuko never gave the specifics of his family, where he lived, who he _was_ when he lived in the Fire Nation. He assumed it was because of what Iroh said about what he’s been through, but maybe that was all a _lie_ , too. Something Zuko had told him to say to cover up who he really is, so he wouldn’t have to answer any questions. How could Sokka have been so _stupid_?

He looks at Azula, cocky and pleased with herself. He can’t trust her, not over this. He storms away, listening to her laughter and Aang’s calls trail off behind him. He needs to find out the truth.

It doesn’t take long to get back to the library. It’s busy, and it takes Sokka a moment to get himself orientated through the fuzz and panic in his brain. It’s a _lie_. This is _Azula_. He’s heard and experienced nothing but bad things about her. Of course, she’d be lying, she’s just trying to sabotage Zuko. It’s fine. It’s a lie. He can’t trust her.

Sokka finds the aisle about Fire Nation history and skims the books, finding one about the royal family, two different editions. He pulls out both, flicking through the most recent edition, printed only a couple years ago. He finds the family trees and skims through it, finding the most recent part. _Ozai_. Then below… _Azula_. But no Zuko. Sokka takes a deep breath, relieved but confused. Maybe it’s a coincidence, Azula has the same name as the princess so she’s using it to her advantage. He grabs the other edition, printed about ten years ago. He skims through to the same page, and his heart stops. There it is…Ozai, Azula, _Zuko_. It can’t be. It must be wrong. It’s a misprint…somehow.

Sokka flicks to the index at the back of the book, finding Zuko’s name. There’s three pages he’s mentioned on. The family tree, and two others. He turns to the first.

It’s a family portrait, by the looks of it. The Fire Lord, his wife, a toddler, and a baby. Sokka squints at the picture. The toddler could be anyone. Black hair, gold eyes. Just a generic Fire Nation citizen. Sokka refuses to acknowledge the familiarity in those gold eyes. He flicks to the second page.

 _Fire Lord Ozai and his wife, Ursa, had two children. Zuko (now 10, pictured below, left) and Azula (now 8, pictured below, right)._ Sokka glances down at the painting of the two of them. He’s far younger and missing his scar, but this time it’s unmistakably Zuko. _No._ Sokka feels like he might pass out, or throw up, or worse. Zuko _lied_ to him. About everything. He’s the _prince_. This can’t be happening.

Numb, and in a trance, Sokka stands up, leaving the books behind on the floor. His ears ring, blocking out the rest of the world, as he stumbles back to the dorms.

He doesn’t notice Zuko until he walks straight into him.

Zuko turns, his face splitting into a big smile as soon as he sees Sokka. Sokka feels like he’s looking at a stranger.

“Sokka, hey, I missed you at lunch,” Zuko says, his smile wavering when Sokka doesn’t respond. “Are you okay, what’s wrong?”

Sokka just stares, unable to tear his eyes away from Zuko. The familiarity of him, the curves of his face, the gold of his eye, the damage of his scar. Every single inch is so familiar to Sokka, so much that when he blinks Zuko’s image is still printed on his eyelids. He’s so, so familiar, but he feels like a complete stranger. He’s a _prince_. Heir to the Fire Nation throne. Everything between them, every shared look, every soft word, every gentle touch, it was all a lie. He told Zuko _everything_. Everything about him, everything the Fire Nation has done. And Zuko was part of it all. His _father_ would’ve been behind all of it, who knows what part Zuko played in it, too.

“Sokka? Has something happened?”

“You-” Sokka finally finds his voice, “your sister, she-” he can’t bear to say any more, to speak the words circling round and round his mind in a relentless dance. “I have to go.”

“Wait, Sokka-” Zuko tries to grab him, but Sokka dodges, running straight back to his dorm in a numb haze.

Katara, Toph, and Aang are all waiting in his room. They all look at him with concerned eyes, even Toph directs her concern in his general direction. It’s obvious that Aang has told them about what Azula said.

“Sokka-” Katara starts, but Sokka shakes his head before she can continue. He starts pacing the room, back and forth, back and forth. He can feel all them all watching him, waiting for him to break the silence. He turns the new information over and over in his mind. Zuko is the prince. Zuko lied. It still doesn’t sound right, no matter how many times he goes over it. It doesn’t make _sense_. If he’s the prince, why is he in the Earth Kingdom? Why hasn’t he seen his parents in years? Why is his uncle, surely also royalty, running a _tea shop_?

Sokka starts to feel the anger taking over. Anger at Zuko, at Iroh, at Azula. Anger at the world for doing this. Anger at himself for letting it happen. It bubbles up inside him, higher and higher, until he’s ready to burst.

“He’s a _prince_ ,” Sokka seethes, kicking his desk before continuing his pacing. “A _prince_. Of the _Fire Nation_. He- he- how _could_ he? He was lying, all this time. _All this time._ ”

“Sokka-”

“No, I just…he _lied_ to me. And I fell for it. Was he using me? Trying to find some way to fuck over the Water Tribe even more? I told him everything, I told him about…” _Yue._

“I’m sorry, Sokka,” Katara says, she grabs his hand, stopping his pacing. “Sit down.”

As soon as he stops moving, Sokka feels the energy seep out of him, along with the anger, leaving nothing but a hollow sadness. He slumps down onto his bed. “How could I be so stupid?”

“You’re not stupid,” Katara says, wrapping her arms around Sokka and squeezing him tight. He lets himself sink into her arms.

“Do you want me to beat him up for you?” Toph asks, cracking her knuckles, “cause I’ll totally beat that guy up for you.” It gets a small laugh out of Sokka. He almost wants to say yes, but…it’s a lie. He’s angry, so, so, so angry. But, in the most annoying way imaginable, it doesn’t change his feelings about Zuko. He wishes it did. He wants to hate him, fight him, never see him again. He wishes he could tell Toph to go and beat him up, but he can’t. He loves him, more than anything, despite the lies, despite the horror of who he actually is, he loves him.

The tears are pouring down his face before he even realises. He sinks lower, head resting on Katara’s lap, tears soaking her skirt. She runs her fingers through his hair slowly, like they used to do for each other as kids when the nightmares got too much.

“I’m so sorry, Sokka,” Aang says, moving to sit on the floor in front of him. Toph shuffles around on the bed, so she’s behind Sokka, her back resting against his. She reaches over and takes one of his hands, squeezing it tight.

It’s like that that Sokka falls asleep, tears staining his cheeks, surrounded by his friends but his heart aching for someone else.


	13. Chapter 13

Sokka wakes up tucked into his bed, still fully clothed. It’s dark out, but Toph is still here, lying on Aang’s bed, while Aang is sat at his desk. Katara is…shouting in the hallway?

“He doesn’t want to see you right now, Zuko,” she’s saying, and Sokka’s heart leaps in every direction. _Zuko’s here_?

“Katara, please-”

“No, you’re not going in.”

“Can you tell me what’s wrong? What have I done?”

Katara scoffs, “Isn’t it obvious?”

“No, I don’t-”

“Leave now, Zuko. You’re not hurting him again. Your sister’s already done enough.”

There’s a long silence. Sokka sits up, straining his ears to hear more. He throws one leg off the bed to stand up, and a floorboard creaks beneath it.

“Can I just talk to him? Please?”

“Go _home_ , Zuko.”

There’s more silence, and then Katara comes inside. The hallway behind her is empty.

“Zuko was here?” Sokka asks once the door is shut behind her.

“I got rid of him,” she says, and Sokka can’t deny the disappoint he feels. He wants to see Zuko, so desperately, but he doesn’t know if he can. He doesn’t know how well he’ll be able to handle seeing him, now he knows the truth. “Are you okay?”

Sokka shrugs, shuffling further back in his bed so Katara can lie next to him, “Angry. Sad.”

Katara puts an arm round him. “You don’t need him.” But he does.

Toph eventually goes to bed, but Katara insists on staying, falling asleep next to Sokka. He wakes up in the middle of the night, wide awake from sleeping the evening away. For a moment, he forgets everything that happened. It all comes back to him in an oppressive wave, drowning out any glimpse of hope. Zuko is well and truly lost to him. His stomach turns at the thought of it, not being able to spend time with him anymore. Worse than any of it is the fact that it’s all under his control. He could choose to forgive him, to move on. But how?

He carefully climbs out of bed, trying not to disturb Katara. He needs air. He barely even registers Aang’s empty bed until he’s long past it, halfway down the stairs. He’ll figure that out later.

He pushes the door open, relishing the wave of fresh air hitting him and airing out his lungs. It chips away ever so slightly at the anxiety eating up his insides.

Aang is stood against the outside wall, staring up at the sky. Well, mystery solved.

“Aang?”

He looks over, only slightly surprised to see Sokka. “Hey, Sokka. How you feeling?”

Sokka waves it off, not wanting to discuss it any more than strictly necessary. “Can’t sleep?”

Aang shakes his head. “I can’t stop thinking about today.”

Sokka joins him leaning against the wall. “What about it?”

“When Azula tried to attack you…”

“Oh yeah, thanks for saving me, by the way.”

“It’s fine, but…I don’t think I was airbending.”

“What? What do you mean?”

“Like, all I was trying to do was push the fire out of the way before it hit you. And it worked, but it didn’t _feel_ like airbending. It felt like…like I was bending the _fire_ , instead.”

“Woah,” Sokka says, “that’s…weird. Are you sure?”

“I don’t know. I feel like nothing makes sense anymore.”

“Let’s hope Gyatso has all the answers, right?”

“If he doesn’t, I don’t know what I’ll do.”

Sokka puts a hand on his shoulder. “It’ll work out, don’t worry yourself too much before you can do anything,” he says, received by Aang with a grateful smile, “besides, maybe you’ve just unlocked a new type of airbending.”

Aang laughs, “I don’t think that’s how it works.”

Sokka shrugs, “I guess we’ll see.”

They’re silent for a moment, staring out into the darkness of the night. Sokka’s thoughts drift to Zuko. Again. _Prince_ Zuko, he thinks bitterly.

“Are you going to talk to Zuko about it?” Aang asks, clearly following Sokka’s train of thought.

“I don’t know,” Sokka admits, “I’m so angry, and hurt, that he lied to me about it. I don’t know if I even want to hear his excuses. But then…I need to know why. I miss him already.”

“I think you should talk to him, really,” Aang says, “give him a chance to explain himself, even if it just only makes things worse. It’s better to know. You don’t want to risk your friendship.”

“I don’t know if there’s a friendship left to risk,” Sokka says, more sad than angry. “I’m going to try sleep again, you should, too.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right.”

They both look up at the clear, starry sky one last time, then head inside for the night.

Because his body hates him, Sokka wakes up at the crack of dawn with his stomach rumbling for breakfast and his heart aching for Zuko. He’s a man of routine and trying to break this one will be near impossible. He tries to sleep again, tossing and turning, but with a swift elbow to the ribs from Katara, he gives up on that. He guesses her looking after him is a moment of the past.

Begrudgingly, he gets up and shoves some clothes on. Even if he doesn’t go to the Jasmine Dragon, he needs food in some form or another. He’ll miss Iroh’s food, though.

He walks into town, deliberately taking an unfamiliar route so he won’t end up at the Jasmine Dragon, or even walking past it. It seemed like a sensible idea, up until the streets started to get far too unfamiliar, and a lot less like he was getting towards any kind of commercial areas.

Sokka stops at the intersect of two narrow residential streets. Okay, he’s well and truly lost. He contemplates knocking on someone’s door for help but judging by the still low position of the sun, he doubts anyone would be too happy about being rudely awakened by a lost university student. So, he walks. And walks. And walks. He tries to follow familiar paths and signs, but it’s difficult. Ba Sing Se is a big place. The walking gives him time to think, which normally Sokka isn’t one to complain about, but at the moment he’d much rather be distracted rather than alone with his thoughts. Over and over again, his mind runs over the new information, attempting and failing to process it. Zuko is the _prince of the Fire Nation_. He isn’t just part of the Nation that ruined Sokka’s life, he is heir to the throne of it. He was raised by the man that most likely ordered the kill on two of the most important people in Sokka’s life. That’s not something he can just get over. Not only that, but he listened to Sokka tell him those stories, he listened to the details of his mother’s death, the tragedy of Yue’s sacrifice, and said nothing. He knew that entire time.

Sokka feels his anger fuelling him, and he makes good progress through the city. As long as he’s going in the right direction, and not just getting even more hopelessly lost.

It seems as though luck is on his side today, however, because he walks down a street where a food merchant is just setting up their stall for the day. Now well past hunger, Sokka buys a little too much of everything and eats it all in far too short of a span of time, right in front of the merchant. He gets an extra bread roll and a kind look for free after that performance. He asks the merchant for directions to the university before he leaves, and he gets a point in a vague direction. It’s not much, but it’s something.

After a while, the streets start to look a little more familiar. Maybe. Sokka finds himself on a small backstreet and he’s _sure_ he’s been here before. It looks familiar. He can see an intersection up ahead, and that _definitely_ looks familiar. He nearly walks straight out into it, but freezes when he gets a glimpse of red movement, his old reflexes kicking in. He reaches over his shoulder for a boomerang that isn’t there, grasping at nothing but thin air.

Sokka tells himself it’s fine, people can wear red, not all Fire Nation people are bad. He’s in the Earth Kingdom, he won’t get hurt here. Still, he peers cautiously round the corner and is suddenly thankful for his hesitation. Just a little further down the street is the back of the Jasmine Dragon, with Zuko stretching right in front of it, thankfully facing in the opposite direction.

Sokka’s heart leaps at the sight of him.

He could easily be there with him, sat on that step, watching his movements. They could be friends again, Sokka could forget all of this. He doesn’t even have to tell Zuko he _knows_. He could pretend none of it ever happened.

He could.

Things could be normal between them. They could go back to how they were, on that doorstep, sat together.

Zuko finishes stretching and takes a deep breath, bringing his arms up to his chest, then pushing them both forward in quick succession, sending flames shooting forward with a heat that Sokka can feel even from where he’s stood. His legs follow, kicking forward and sending more flames bursting towards Sokka, illuminating the street he’s hid down and just brushing past his face. He ducks back, avoiding the flames. After a moment, his courage returns, and he pokes his head out again. Zuko is still going, fuelled by some unseen anger. It’s nothing like when Sokka watched him before, merely going through the motions of the exercises. There’s _weight_ behind them now, and a danger that he didn’t see in Zuko’s movements before. That’s when it really clicks for him. Zuko is _dangerous_. He’s a talented firebender and swordsman. And of course he is, he would’ve had the best training money and status could buy. _I’ve come from two long lines of powerful benders_. His prodigal father, sister, uncle. Fire Nation royalty. Of course he's powerful. Zuko would be dangerous enough on his own, without the ideologies he was no doubt indoctrinated into by the Fire Lord.

Sokka feels new waves of anger. He’s surprised Zuko was even able to spend more than five minutes with him. Azula is evidence enough of what they teach about the Water Tribes in the Fire Nation, and no doubt Zuko feels the same, deep down. Sokka looks at him again, the anger in his expression, the aggression in his deadly movements. He can’t do this. What was he thinking? Forgetting any of this happened, pretending like Zuko _isn’t_ the son of the Fire Lord? It’s ridiculous. A child’s game of hope.

He allows himself one moment of insanity, one moment to take in Zuko’s face and remember the friend he had in him, the hopes of more between them, the aching in his heart for those lingering touches and drawn-out looks shared between them. For that brief, blissful moment, Zuko is nothing more than himself, existing without the burden of his royal bloodline, he’s just Zuko. And Sokka loves him with all his heart.

When Zuko locks eyes with Sokka, there’s a moment of recognition; Zuko’s eyes widen and his face softens, all aggression leaving it. It feeds the hope deep in Sokka’s heart and he lives in his insanity for a moment longer, aching to reach out and touch Zuko, to tell him how he feels, that he doesn’t care about any of it. Reality comes crashing back in with a steely lock around Sokka’s heart and the knowledge that he can’t look past who Zuko is and the lies he built up around them. Sokka disappears into the shadows, easily finding his way back to campus with his bearings back, Zuko’s calls fading off behind him.

Sokka spends the next few days thinking about the way Zuko looked at him. He tries his best not to, but he can’t stop thinking about the way all his anger leeched out of his face the moment he spotted Sokka. He tells himself it was just shock, nothing more. It didn’t mean anything. It can’t have.

“When do you think he’ll be done?” Katara asks, breaking Sokka out of his reverie. She’s been pacing back and forth for longer than Sokka has been keeping track, while he and Toph lounge on the grass beneath the tree.

“Relax, the guy is basically his dad, I’m sure they want to catch up,” Sokka says.

“But I want to know he’s okay,” Katara says, still pacing.

“He’s _fine_ , sit down,” Toph says. Katara stops, hesitates, then sits. She still doesn’t relax.

“He’s fine,” Sokka insists, but Katara doesn’t look convinced. So, she _really_ likes Aang.

Toph shivers next to Sokka. “Please tell me it’s going to get too cold for us to hang out here, soon. You guys are persistent.”

“This is _nothing_ ,” Sokka says, but he and Katara are both in a lot heavier coats than Toph, and they’re really getting into winter now. “Do you want to borrow a coat?”

“Please,” Toph says.

The three of them walk back to the dorms, Katara too restless to sit on her own.

“You know, we could just spend our time _indoors_ , instead of freezing,” Toph says.

“Gran Gran always said, if the sun is shining you should be outside,” Katara says.

“The sun is _barely_ shining,” Toph says, “besides, don’t you guys get, like, 24 hours of sunlight in summer?”

“Don’t remind me,” Sokka says, “we hardly get any sleep in the summer, she’s dragging us out of bed at all hours of the day or night.”

Katara laughs, the tension easing out of her a bit, “I don’t miss _that_.”

They go up to Sokka’s room, and the last thing he expects to see is Aang sat alone on his bed, staring off into space.

“Aang?” Katara says, pushing past Sokka into the room, “Did you talk to Gyatso? What’s going on?”

“Yeah, I talked to him,” Aang says, the life sapped out of his voice.

“What’s the matter?” she asks.

“I was right, Sokka,” Aang says, looking up at him, “it was firebending.”

“What?” Sokka asks. That doesn’t make any sense. “What do you mean?”

“I’m the avatar,” Aang says, as simply as that. The room drops into silence.

“What?” Sokka and Katara both say, voices merging into one.

“I always knew you were different, twinkle toes,” Toph says.

“But the avatar is…gone.” Katara sits down next to Aang on the bed. Very close, Sokka notices.

Aang shakes his head. “That’s what I thought, too. Turns out the monks were lying to me my entire life. Apparently, my past life, avatar Roku, went into hiding after his fight with Fire Lord Sozin. Not many people knew about it, but the monks figured out who I was when I was just a kid. The Fire Nation…they knew about Roku, too. They knew when he died there’d be a kid born into the Air Nomads. They somehow figured out I was in the Southern Temple, and…”

Sokka feels sick to his stomach, knowing exactly where Aang is going with this.

“They killed all of the kids in my Temple. Gyatso managed to hide me and keep me safe, but everyone else wasn’t as lucky. That’s why there were never any other kids around when I was growing up.”

“Aang, I’m so sorry,” Katara says, putting a hand over his. Sokka can’t even speak, he’s so angry. The _Fire Nation_ , of course.

“They didn’t know I survived, so they thought that the avatar had been reborn into one of the Water Tribes.”

“No…” Katara says with a gasp, hand going to her necklace. Sokka clenches his fists.

“That’s why they tried to wipe out the waterbenders,” Aang says.

“Our mum…” Katara says.

 _Yue_ , Sokka thinks.

“Why?” Katara asks, “Why did they do it?”

“Was it Zhao?” Sokka says thorough clenched teeth.

“Gyatso only knows from what he’s heard from some of the Fire Sages, but they think…” Aang hesitates, glancing at Sokka, and he knows it’s going to be bad, “they think Fire Lord Ozai is planning something big, and he needs the avatar, he needs _me_ , out of the way to do that.”

So Sokka was right. It’s Zuko’s father. All along, all this time. He’s the reason behind it all. Sokka expected it, knew it, really. And yet, he’s still surprised. A small part of him had still been holding out hope that all the blame could be put on Zhao, that he was acting alone out of some kind of hatred for waterbenders. That Zuko wouldn’t be involved.

Even if Zuko knew nothing about it, had no part in it, it doesn’t take away the sting. He’s still the Fire Lord’s _son_ , he was still raised by him, taught by him. As far as Sokka knows, he could be in Ozai’s pocket trying to help him finish the job, and Sokka is just part of that. Insider Water Tribe knowledge. Sokka’s chest aches, deep and hollow. Either way, whatever the situation, he can’t even bear to think about Zuko. Never seeing him again would be simultaneously the best and worst possible scenario.

Sokka can feel all eyes on him, and he turns away, sitting down and avoiding everyone’s looks.

“Aang, are you okay?” Katara asks.

“I don’t know,” Aang admits, “Gyatso said if my past lives have been trying to contact me, that means there’s imminent danger and the world needs the avatar. But I’m _not_ the avatar, I’m just an airbender. I’m not _ready_ to be the avatar. I don’t know if I can do this.”

“You don’t have to do it alone,” Katara says, “you’ve got a waterbending and earthbending teacher right here, and we’ve all got your back.”

“Really?”

“Really,” Katara says, “you won’t face any of it alone. Sokka’s always ready to knock some firebender heads.”

Sokka smiles, pushing down thoughts of the one _specific_ firebender that comes to mind, “Always.”

“Don’t count me out, either,” Toph says, cracking her knuckles, “knocking heads is what I do best.”

Aang smiles, looking round the group of them, “Thanks, guys. It means a lot.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this chapter was originally going to be part of the next one, but that ones already looking real big, so i've made it into a bit of a mini chapter instead

Sokka already thought waterbending was bad enough when it was just Katara learning. He ended up soaked too many times for his liking. Turns out when it’s two waterbenders, it’s even worse. He still hadn’t really been able to believe Aang was the avatar until saw it for himself, but over the past week, Katara and Toph had been teaching him some water and earthbending in any spare moments they had. He’d been progressing well with waterbending, getting Sokka soaked practically every day. His earthbending wasn’t going quite as easily, but he’d made a couple small rocks move. It was something.

“When are you going to talk to Zuko?” Toph asks, having given up on yelling at Aang for the day and coming to sit with Sokka from his spectator position on the floor. They’d found a small alley round the back of the dorms that no one ever came down and were using that as their practice spot to make sure no one would see Aang and figure out the truth, to keep him safe from the Fire Nation.

“What do you mean, when?” Sokka says, watching Katara and Aang’s waterbending carefully, ready to dodge at a moment’s notice.

“Come on, you’re gonna have to talk to him.”

Sokka crosses his arms. “No, I don’t.”

Aang stops bending for a moment, the water dropping to the floor with a splash that soaks Sokka’s shoes. Of _course_.

“You should, Sokka,” he says.

Sokka groans, “You, too?”

“I’m going to have to meet him soon to do our work,” Aang says, “I think it would be better if you see him, first.”

Sokka knows he’s right, but he doesn’t want to admit it to anyone, least of all himself, because then he’d actually have to confront his problems, and that’s not something he’s about to start doing.

“Sokka, he’s right,” Katara says, letting her water down more gently. “I know you don’t want to, but-”

“I know, I know,” Sokka says, “it’s only fair on him, blah blah blah.”

“I was going to say it’s only fair on _you_ ,” Katara says, “I'm angry at him too, but you need closure, one way or another.”

Sokka crosses his arms tighter, sinking down the wall. She’s right, but that doesn’t make him want to talk to Zuko any more. He doesn’t _want_ closure. He doesn’t want to admit to himself this is what’s happening.

Katara sighs, turning away, “Do what you want,” she says, continuing her bending. “Come on, Aang.”

Aang turns too, getting into position. Just as the water starts to lift off the ground, someone walks past the street and they both quickly drop it to the floor. Sokka _really_ gets soaked, now.

They all stare at the end of the street. It looks like the person is gone, but they can’t be too careful. Tension hangs in the air, all of them holding their breath and waiting for the danger to pass.

“They’re coming back,” Toph says.

“Oh, no,” Katara says, barely audible.

“Wait,” Toph puts a hand up, “I recognise…”

Sokka sort of expects it before his happens. Zuko sticks his head round the street corner, then his entire body. A wave of nausea passes through Sokka’s body. This is it; he supposes.

Katara lifts the water back up, in a defensive pose. Aang puts a hand on her arm.

“Katara-”

“He lied to me too, Aang,” she says, but lowers the water down carefully anyway.

“Sokka?” Zuko calls out, “Can we talk?”

Aang gives him a meaningful look. Toph elbows him. Okay, he’s doing this. He gets up wordlessly, walking towards Zuko, trying to psyche himself up. He can do this. It’s fine.

He avoids looking at Zuko’s face until he’s right in front of him, and of course he’s instantly floored. He hasn’t seen him in nearly a week. He’s just as stunning as Sokka remembers, his gold eye filled with concern, eyebrow drawn up, lips downturned. Sokka wants to wipe that expression off his face, hating seeing the pain in it. But Zuko inflicted the first pain.

“Sokka…” Zuko starts, but Sokka walks past him, leading him round the corner and out of view of the others, hopefully out of earshot, too. If he’s lucky.

“What do you want?” Sokka asks, trying to keep himself cold and detached, knowing he can’t treat Zuko how he wants to. He can see the effect of his detachment on Zuko, his shoulders slumping ever so slightly, eyes turning down and avoiding Sokka’s.

“I don’t know what my sister said to you, but I’m sorry for whatever it was. She can really be an asshole, she’s always just trying to get to me,” Zuko explains, “it was probably a lie, whatever it was. Azula _always_ lies.”

“It wasn’t a lie, Zuko.”

Zuko looks surprised, looking back up and meeting his eyes. “What did she say?”

“She told me the truth,” Sokka says simply, “which is more than you did.”

Zuko frowns, “What?”

Sokka feels the anger build up inside him, anger at Zuko, at Azula, at himself. Anger that this is the situation they’re in, that it couldn’t have just been _normal_. “You _lied_ to me, Zuko. About everything.”

“I don’t know-”

“You know _exactly_ what I’m talking about!” Sokka says, his voice rising, “You didn’t think it was worth mentioning that you were the _Prince of the Fire Nation_?”

Zuko face falls. “Azula told you.”

“Yeah, she did. Why did you lie?”

“I didn’t have a choice!” Zuko says, his own voice rising, too.

“That’s bullshit, of course you had a choice!”

“When do you think it would be appropriate for me? When you hated me because I’m from the Fire Nation? Or when you told me that your mother was killed by the Fire Nation? Or when you finally forgave me for something that _I never did in the first place_?”

“ _Any_ of those would’ve been better than waiting for me to figure it out on my own! I _trusted_ you, I told you everything the Fire Nation had done to hurt me and my family, and you just…just sat there, knowing it was your _father’s_ fault, and you didn’t say a word.”

“Because I wanted you to trust me!”

“So you _lied_ to me?”

“I didn’t know what else to do, Sokka! Your trust felt so precarious, I knew the moment you found out who I was, you’d hate me.”

“ _Don’t_ blame this on me.”

“I’m _not_ , I just…I haven’t been a prince for a long time, Sokka.”

Sokka opens his mouth to say something, but he doesn’t know what. He wants to yell and cry and scream. Why did it have to be Zuko?

“I mean it,” Zuko says, his voice calmer and sincere, “I told you, I haven’t seen my father or been to the Fire Nation in _years_. Since I was a kid.”

“How can I trust that?” Sokka asks, “How do I know anything you tell me is the truth?”

Zuko slumps again, looking down, “You can’t, I guess.”

Sokka doesn’t know what else to say. The sadness in Zuko’s frame kills him; he wants to hug him, reassure him it’s okay. But it’s not, and he don’t know if it’ll ever be.

“I know you don’t trust me anymore,” Zuko says, his voice soft and broken, “but I promise, I _swear_ , I have no place in the Fire Nation anymore. I haven’t been welcome there in a long time.”

Looking at Zuko’s face, the scar marring his skin, he can’t pretend he’s not curious. He knew he’d left the Fire Nation, but he didn’t know he wasn’t _welcome_ there. What does that even mean?

“I have no ties to the Fire Nation,” Zuko adds, “not anymore.”

“Not even your sister, your family?”

“My family is-”

“Not even Mai?”

Zuko frowns, taken aback. “Mai? What’s Mai got to do with anything?”

Sokka shakes his head, not even wanting to get into it. “So, can you tell me that if the Fire Nation welcomed you back with open arms tomorrow, you wouldn’t go back?”

Zuko sighs. “Sokka…”

“Exactly.”

“It’s my _family_.”

“I know,” Sokka says, “and your family destroyed mine.”

“I’m sorry,” Zuko says, “I shouldn’t have lied.”

“Yeah, right, like you wouldn’t do it again in a heartbeat.”

“I wanted you to trust me.”

“And I wanted to be able to trust you!” Sokka’s voice starts rising again, but he can’t help it. He doesn’t even care if everyone else hears.

“I just wanted to be your friend,” Zuko says, and that just sends Sokka off the deep end. _Friend_ , nothing more.

“I wanted _far more_ than just your friendship, Zuko.”

Zuko’s face freezes, completely expressionless. A slow frown grows across his face. “What?”

“Like I didn’t make it entirely obvious.”

“What do you mean?”

“Come _on_ , Zuko.”

“I don’t-”

“I _loved_ you, Zuko!” Sokka says, really yelling now. There’s no _way_ the others aren’t hearing this. “I _trusted_ you and I _loved_ you, and it was _all_ a lie.”

Zuko looks entirely dumbfounded, his expression blank.

“I thought I made it pretty obvious, but I guess not,” Sokka says, “I thought maybe, maybe, you could feel the same way. Maybe I could really be that lucky. But if you had ever even _slightly_ cared about me, you wouldn’t have lied to me, not about that.”

Zuko’s expression still doesn’t change, and Sokka really doesn’t want to wait around any longer for him to process it. He turns and starts walking away.

“Sokka, no, wait-” Zuko reaches out, grabbing Sokka’s wrist. “ _Please_.”

“Leave me alone,” Sokka says, pulling his arm out of Zuko’s grip. “Go back to the Fire Nation.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @ everyone asking for them to communicate please feel free to send me hate
> 
> i also have a new zukka fic in the works so watch this space!


	15. Chapter 15

Wallowing in self-pity for the next few days is pretty much all Sokka is capable of doing. He really, _really_ told Zuko how he felt. And then ran away from him. How could he be such an _idiot_? He shouldn’t have said anything, or he should’ve at least stuck around for what Zuko had to say, but no, he clearly has nothing worthwhile going on in that brain of his.

He wants to kick himself, to drop out of university, to go home, to find Zuko and tell him he didn’t mean any of it, to find Zuko and tell him he meant _all_ of it. He ends up spending all day in his room instead. He knows Aang has gone to meet Zuko today, too, to do their work. He tried to keep it hidden from Sokka, but he knows what’s going on. Sokka could easily go to the library or the Jasmine Dragon right now and find them, talk to him.

Sokka groans to himself, hating the position he’s put himself in. He forces himself to get up, knowing he needs either to vent to Katara or at the very least some distraction from Toph. He goes over to their dorm, ready to offload his woes. Except, when he gets there, Katara is reading a letter alone, her face slack in an expression Sokka is all too familiar with. This is bad news.

“We need to go home,” Katara says, without even looking up at Sokka.

“What? Why?”

She hands him the letter and he sits down next to her.

“It’s dad,” Katara explains, “he’s told us not to come home for the Glacier Spirits Festival. There’s…” Katara sighs wearily, “they’re expecting a new surge of Fire Nation attacks, we don’t know why, but they’ve been hearing warnings down the grapevine. Dad wants us to stay here so we’re safe because they don’t know when the attacks might happen.”

“So, we’re going home, right?” Sokka says, quickly skimming over the letter.

“Obviously,” Katara says, “we can’t leave them to fight alone.”

“When?”

“We have two more weeks of classes, but…”

“We can’t wait two weeks,” Sokka finishes Katara’s thought.

“Exactly. They’re gonna need all the help they can get. Do you think Aang and Toph…?”

“Of course, they’d help.”

“I don’t want to ask them to skip out on classes, though,” Katara says, her brows knit together. Sokka can already feel her taking the burden of the tribe onto her back again, “or put themselves in unnecessary danger.”

“You know they’d do anything to help us,” Sokka says, “they’re our friends, we can ask that of them.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, Katara,” Sokka insists, “we’ll be okay. We’re not letting them destroy our tribe again.”

Sokka reads the letter again. And again. Hoping it’s not real. He’d really hoped the Fire Nation was behind him now. Zuko, despite his lies, had helped him come to terms with what happened and recognise that not everyone from the Fire Nation is bad. He supposes that doesn’t really count any more. Surely, this couldn’t have anything to do with Zuko, could it?

“Katara, do you think…” Sokka says, hesitating, not even wanting to voice it, “you don’t think Zuko’s involved?”

“I don’t think so,” Katara says, with a reassuring smile, “he’s an asshole for lying, but I don’t think he’d do that to you. To us. He’s not that kind of person.”

“Yeah…” Sokka says, hoping he can still trust that he knows what kind of person Zuko is.

“Tonight?” Aang says, “Like, tonight, tonight?”

“Tonight,” Katara repeats, “we can’t waste any time, it’ll take a while to get to the South Pole and we can’t risk not being there when they attack.”

Aang sighs, “I wish I had Appa with me right now.”

“What’s Appa?” Sokka asks.

“My flying bison, he’d get us there so much faster.”

“Wait, wait,” Sokka says, “your _flying bison_.”

“Yeah,” Aang says, with a fond smile, “all airbenders get one, but I couldn’t bring him with me to Ba Sing Se, there’s nowhere for him to stay.”

“Well…” Katara says with a thoughtful look, “the Southern Air Temple is on the way to the South Pole, we could stop there first.”

Aang’s smile practically splits his face in two. “ _Yes_! Perfect!”

“No, just wait a second,” Toph says, “you’re saying we’re going to be _flying_ on the back of an animal?”

“Yeah!”

“No way, not happening. Not at all. I’ll stay on the ground, thanks.”

“Oh, come on, Toph, you’ll be fine,” Katara says.

“I don’t do flying, I don’t do water, I don’t do sand. I need nice, solid _earth_ beneath my feet.”

“You know the South Pole is across an ocean, right?” Sokka says.

“ _Don’t_ remind me.”

“I’ll be your eyes,” Sokka suggests, “or your…feet. Whatever. We need you, how are we supposed to beat the Fire Nation without the world’s greatest earthbender?”

“Well, you’re right there,” Toph says, “fine, okay, I’ll do it. So, we’re really leaving tonight?”

“As soon as we’re packed,” Sokka says.

“Then we better get moving.”

It’s difficult, trying to pack up for a journey like this. Obviously, Sokka’s packed his boomerang and sword, but beyond that he’s got to strip down to the bare essentials. Sleeping bag, as much food as he has in his room, and enough clothes to last however long the journey will take. He hopes it’ll be enough. His hands shake as he packs it all into a bag, nerves overcoming him. He’s trying hard to think about the present and immediate future. Get packed, get out of Ba Sing Se. That’s all he needs to do right now. Still, his thoughts keep drifting back to the tribe, preparing for attack. His father and grandmother in danger. Two of the three family members he has left, vulnerable to the Fire Nation. _Again_. And he's taking the third one straight to them.

Sokka swallows down the bile rising in his throat.

“Hey,” Aang says, putting a hand over Sokka’s and stilling his movements, “are you alright?”

Sokka closes his eyes, taking a deep, calming breath before he answers. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“You’re allowed not to be, you know.”

The tears start to bloom in the corners of Sokka’s eyes, but he can’t let them spill. Not now, not when they haven’t even _left_ yet.

“I never should’ve left home,” Sokka says, “they’re unprotected, and it’s my fault.”

“There’s still all the other soldiers, isn’t there?” Aang asks.

“Something could still happen,” Sokka insists, “they could still-”

“Listen,” Aang says, voice serious. It’s enough to get Sokka’s attention, to shift his focus from the blurring bag in front of him to Aang’s more stable face, mouth set in a hard line, but eyes gentle and understanding. “We’re going to be there soon; we’re going as fast as we can. And you couldn’t hope for a better team, right?” Aang gives a soft smile that starts to ease Sokka’s nerves. “The best waterbender and earthbender I’ve ever met, the best warrior I’ve ever met, and the avatar! Sure, I’m not exactly _trained_ , but still. Maybe this is what my past lives were trying to warn me about, I needed to help save the Southern Water Tribe.”

Sokka knows he means well, and it is reassuring having such a powerful team on his side, but the prospect of _this_ being what the avatar is needed for is a terrifying one. Is his tribe in that much danger? Should he be dragging his friends into this, his _sister_ into this? Katara only narrowly escaped execution at the hands on the Fire Nation before, he hates to think what’ll happen if they come face to face with a Southern waterbender again.

“Maybe I should go alone,” Sokka says, showing the last few bits into his bag and pulling it over his shoulder. “I don’t want to put you guys at risk.”

“Sokka, no way.”

“If they got a hold of Katara-” Sokka hesitates, reminding himself to breathe, feeling the creeping hand of dread reaching up from his stomach and wrapping around his throat. The thought of them doing _anything_ to Katara… “If they figure out that _you’re_ the avatar…”

“I know, Sokka. I promise I won’t let anything happen to Katara, as for me…” Aang face shifts, changes into a mask of sheer determination. “It’s a risk I’m willing to take.”

“No, Aang, if you got captured-”

“I’m the avatar, right? This is what I’m supposed to do. Maintain balance. I couldn’t protect my own people, the least I can do is protect yours.”

“Thank you,” Sokka says, his heart pouring out with the words. “You- It really- it really means a lot.”

Aang just smiles, “Let’s go find the others and get out of here.”

The monorail gets busier the further towards the edge of Ba Sing Se they get, despite the late hour. By the first stop in the outer ring, it looks like rush hour. Sokka’s glad he doesn’t have to take it in an _actual_ rush hour. When the doors open to let in another onslaught of passengers, Sokka jumps up at the sight of a face through the window. He pushes through the crowds to reach the doors.

“Suki!” he yells over everyone’s heads, going on his tiptoes to ensure he’s seen. Suki and the other Kyoshi warrior with her both turn, and while her friend’s face sinks into a confused frown, Suki’s splits into a big grin. She runs over, tailed by the other warrior.

“Sokka, what are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same.”

Suki rolls her eyes with a sigh, “It’s the Earth King, he’s so paranoid about uprisings in the lower ring. You know that’s _all_ we’re here for? We thought we’d be doing something interesting or exciting, but no, we’re acting as _police_. It’s ridiculous.”

Sokka frowns, “Doesn’t the King have his own personal police force?”

“Yeah, but they’re all guarding his _palace_ ,” Suki shakes her head, clearing the annoyance on her face, “anyway, what’s going on? Where are you going at this hour?”

“ _Home_ ,” Sokka says with a smile, which stutters and falters to a worried frown, “we got word that the Fire Nation might be planning another raid on our tribe. Our dad said not to come home, but…”

“But you don’t know how to sit out of a fight,” Suki finishes.

Sokka smiles despite himself. “You know me so well.”

“I do,” Suki grins back. A bell rings, signifying the monorail is about to leave. Something crosses Suki’s face, and she glances around herself, then shares a look with the girl next to her. “Keiko, have you got this? Can you cover for me?”

The girl, Keiko, smiles and nudges her, “Go on.”

“Thank you,” Suki says, and gives her a brief hug, before jumping onto the carriage, squeezing in just as the doors close.

Sokka stumbles backwards, grabbing Suki and trying to keep both of them upright amongst the crowd. “What are you doing?”

“I’m coming with you.”

“You- what?”

“I’m not letting you defend your home alone,” Suki says, “I want you to have all the help you can get.”

Sokka pulls Suki into a hug, squeezing her tight, relief flooding him knowing they’ll have an extra pair of hands to fight off the Fire Nation. It still might not be enough, but it’s something. He drags Suki over to where the others are packed in against the wall, explaining to them the new situation. Aang and Toph are as happy as anyone else would be, but Sokka can see his own relief mirrored in Katara’s face, and he knows she’s feeling the exact same as him. The ball of anxiety rooted deep in his stomach, tendrils reaching out into all of his limbs. They both remember what happened at the last Fire Nation raid.

The ferry ride is little more than a day, and Sokka ends up sleeping for most of it. The anxiety that had been filling him ever since he and Katara got that letter had drained him entirely. He’d spent the wait for the ferry pacing back and forth while the rest of them stared at him in exhaustion, and he’d finally reached his limit, pretty much passing out as soon as they were on board.

When Sokka wakes up, he’s sure it can’t have been that long; it’s still dark outside, the stars barely visible through the window. Except, judging by the weight in his limbs and sluggishness filling his skull to the brim, it’s been far longer.

Aang, Toph, and Suki are all asleep on the floor around him. Katara’s bags are lying against the wall, but she’s nowhere to be seen. Carefully so as not to disturb the others, Sokka climbs out of his sleeping bag and tiptoes across the floor, avoiding other sleeping bodies. He opens the heavy metal door to the deck outside, where there were just as many people. He spots Katara quickly, looking out over the horizon on her own.

“Can’t sleep?” Sokka asks, joining her leaning against the railing.

Katara looks at him with raised eyebrows, “ _You_ clearly didn’t have that problem.”

“Hey, I like my sleep!”

“You slept for nearly _twenty-four hours_.” Wow, okay, Sokka wasn’t expecting that. He supposes he’d been sleeping even worse than he’d thought for the last few days, since…nothing. Since nothing. That’s not important right now.

“I was tired,” Sokka says, then slumps over the railing with a sigh, “I’m scared.”

Katara looks back over the water, “Me too. We’ll be stopping in Full Moon Bay soon.”

Sokka nods. Once they land there, they’ll have to get on a new, bigger ferry through the Eastern Sea round to the South of the Earth Kingdom, which will take just over a week. From there, they’ll have to get a smaller boat to the Southern Air Temple, and finally fly on Aang’s bison to the South Pole. Overall, it’ll take them just under two weeks. If they’re lucky. By the time they get there, the Fire Nation could be long gone, their village reduced to nothing more than a few piles of ice.

“I know what you’re thinking,” Katara says.

“Do you?”

“It’ll take the Fire Nation a few weeks to travel to the South, too. And that’s if they’re leaving _now_. We’ll get there in time.”

Sokka hums an indistinct response, Katara’s words not really doing much to take the edge off his nerves.

Katara shifts closer so their elbows are touching on the railing, their upper arms pressed together. “That, or you’re thinking about Zuko.”

Sokka had actually been doing a _great_ job trying to think about everything _but_ Zuko. He really can’t even begin to unpack how he’s feeling about him at the moment, not when he’s filled to the brim with worry about his tribe and family. There’s too much confusion there; whether or not he regrets the things he said to Zuko, whether or not he regrets _everything_ that happened with Zuko, and most importantly _how_ he actually feels about him. Every time an unwanted thought about him pops up, it’s a confusing mingling of anger and hatred, but also love and affection. It’s so impossibly confusing, wanting to hit him and scream at him, but also wanting to be close to him, to touch him, to _kiss_ him. This is why Sokka tries to avoid thinking about it at all.

“Don’t remind me,” he says, with a groan.

“I know you said you don’t want to talk-”

“You’re _right_ , I _don’t_ want to talk about it.”

“Sokka.”

“Katara.”

“It doesn’t seem like you left things well with him.”

“I said I don’t want to talk about it!”

“You can’t ignore it forever!”

Sokka crosses his arms. “I can.”

Katara is silent, but Sokka can feel her eyes boring into him, and that’s just as bad.

“He _lied_ to me, Katara, he lied to all of us.”

“I know,” Katara says, “and I’m annoyed about it too, he shouldn’t have lied. _Especially_ about that. But…”

Sokka looks at her, waiting for her answer, his eyebrows raised expectantly. But _what_?

Katara looks away from his glare with a roll of her eyes. “But it doesn’t change how you feel about him.”

“You don’t know how I feel about him.”

“Sokka, I know you better than I know myself. You haven’t acted this way about someone since-”

“ _Don’t_ say it. Don’t compare him to her.”

Katara gives him a _look_ before going back to staring at the ocean, at the ever-approaching lights of the coast. “I want what’s best for you, Sokka.”

“And you think that’s the son of the man who’s ruined our lives?”

“I know he makes you happy.”

“It’s not as simple as that.”

“It can be.”

“You’re telling me if you found out Aang had been the one to kill _our mother_ , you’d get over it, just like that? Because he makes you _happy_?”

“I- I’m not-” Katara ducks her head, a dark blush covering her cheeks. “Sokka. You _know_ it’s not like that. Zuko isn’t Zhao. Isn’t the Fire Lord.”

“He might as well be.”

“You’re so-” Katara groans. “I think you’re looking for someone to blame,” she says, prodding him in the chest _hard_. “I think you’re scared that you’re happy with him so you’re pushing him away before something bad can happen to him like it did with Yue.” Another prod.

Sokka flinches at the sound of her name. “He’s the _prince of the Fire Nation_ , Katara. I’m not just making up excuses to push him away.”

“No, you are, Sokka. Sure, be angry at him for lying. Be upset that he didn’t tell you. Be scared that he’s the son of the Fire Lord. But _don’t_ act the way you’re acting now.”

“How am I acting now?”

“You’re acting like _he_ killed them! He was a _child._ You really think he made the order to kill our mother at the age of _ten_? You think he forced Yue to give up her life when he hadn’t lived in the Fire Nation for years?”

“Katara, stop.”

“ _No._ I’ve had enough of you _making yourself miserable_. You deserve to be happy, Sokka, don’t you see that?” Katara’s raising her voice now, getting the attention of other passengers. “You’re _always_ sabotaging yourself. You did it with Suki, you did it with Yue, and you’re doing it with Zuko.”

“I’m _not_. He _lied_. I can’t trust him!”

“He lied because he cared about you!”

“He lied because he wanted to take the easy route,” Sokka corrects.

“You’re impossible, you know that? You’re afraid to be happy, and Zuko makes you happy.”

“He doesn’t, not anymore.”

Katara groans again, and Sokka expects a blast of water to the face that never comes.

“I give up, I’m not talking to you about this,” she says instead, turning and walking away. After a few steps, she stops, hesitating. She turns. “Just remember that Zuko hasn’t done _anything_ except that. He’s given you no proof he’s loyal to the Fire Nation or supports what they’ve done. You have no reason not to forgive him and let him redeem himself to you,” she says, “maybe he doesn’t deserve it, I don’t care. But you deserve to be happy.”

Katara turns on her heels and disappears back inside, leaving Sokka alone in the brisk night air. Katara’s words turn around his head, over and over. He’s right in being upset with Zuko, isn’t he? This isn’t just him sabotaging himself, Zuko _hurt_ him. Sure, Zuko makes him happy, but…Sokka doesn’t even know how to finish the thought anymore. What else is there to it? Does anything else really matter? He loves Zuko. If Zuko loves him too, shouldn’t he just take that? It’s more than a lot of people get. It’s more than _he’s_ gotten in the past. Maybe it is just enough to love and be loved. Does it really matter who Zuko is, under that?

“Okay, no, I change my mind. I’m not doing this,” Toph says, stood on the ground staring up at the four of them on top of the giant furry beast that is Appa. The ferry journeys had gone as well as expected; long and boring, but they got to their destination. Sokka was quiet for a lot of it. He couldn’t stop thinking about what Katara had said. The more time he stewed on the information, the more he started to regret how he’d handled everything with Zuko. Maybe he should’ve been more understanding and let Zuko explain himself. Maybe he _is_ scared to be happy.

“Come on, Toph,” Katara says, “it’s too late now.”

“No, no way,” Toph says. “I’ll wait here, thanks.”

“We’re not leaving without you,” Katara insists.

Toph crosses her arms, standing her ground. Aang peers over the edge at her. He turns back at the group with a wink, then sends a fist up, pulling up the earth under Toph’s feet so she goes flying into the air. Sokka reaches forward, grabbing her arms and pulling her onto the saddle.

She shoves him off, crossing her arms again. “I’m done teaching you earthbending, you can learn by yourself now.”

Aang just laughs. “Ready everyone?”

Katara sends a nervous glance at Toph. “Ready as we’ll ever be.”

“Appa, yip yip,” Aang calls out, then suddenly they’re lifting into the air, wind buffeting past them as the temple below becomes nothing more than a small speck below the clouds. Toph shuffles closer to Sokka and loops her arm under his, holding on tight. He doesn’t say anything about it.

Katara leans over the edge of the saddle, precariously so, to the point where Sokka considers grabbing the back of her shirt to pull her in. “This is _amazing_ ,” she says.

“It’s gorgeous,” Suki agrees.

“Right?” Aang says with a proud grin. “We‘ll be in the South Pole in no time.”

Aang isn't wrong, either. By mid-afternoon, they could see the snowy land in the distance. Sokka’s heart swells. It had been far too long since he’d seen home, or snow, or ice. He _missed_ it. Missed the people, the food, the cold, the hunting, the sounds, the smells. Everything.

It pops up in his head, quickly and unwanted. Zuko bundled up in furs, gloved hand holding tight onto Sokka’s as he shows him round the village, introducing him to his family, showing him the best food. Huddling together around the fire long after everyone else has gone to bed. Cold lips meeting to make warmth.

Sokka shakes his head, forcing the image out of it. Even if he could, one day, forgive Zuko, he could never bring him home. How could he _ever_ face his tribe, who had been hurt so badly in so many ways by the Fire Nation, with the Crown Prince on his arm? It’s not like Zuko could ever introduce Sokka to his family, either. The thought of being introduced to the _Fire Lord_ makes Sokka feel nauseous. That, more than anything, really hits the truth of this situation home. If things were to ever work out, if they could ever fix things between them, it couldn’t be a _real_ relationship. Not one either of them can bring home. Sokka’s heart shatters at the thought of it. He’d love more than anything to introduce Zuko to his family, and likewise. He’d be great to introduce to the family, cracking jokes, sucking up. He’d love to meet the people that made Zuko who he is, who raised him. But he can’t. Not now, not ever.

“Sokka, _look_ ,” Katara says, grabbing his arm tight. Sokka turns to look back across the ocean. It’s really upon them now; the snowy peaks reaching up to the sky, the few boats docked in the harbour, the igloos scattered around amongst children playing, people working and talking. _Home_.


	16. Chapter 16

As much as Sokka would love to be greeted with fanfare, he doesn’t get his hopes up. Which is why he isn’t surprised when his father greets them with a sigh and an unimpressed face. He’d at least hoped for a little more than _that_.

“I can’t believe you two,” Hakoda says as soon as they climb off Appa, with crossed arms, really pulling out all the stops on his disappointed dad face.

“Did you really expect any less from us?” Sokka says.

A smile breaks through Hakoda’s mask, and he pulls the two of them into a tight hug. “Of course not, but I can hope that occasionally my children will have some sense.”

“You didn’t raise us like that,” Katara says, and Sokka can hear her smile. Being in their father’s arms, on their home ground, things feel okay. Maybe it’ll be fine, maybe everyone will be safe. Maybe it was some bad information, and the Fire Nation isn’t coming after all.

Over Hakoda’s shoulder, Sokka spots their grandmother and he tears away quickly.

“Gran Gran!” he shouts, hearing Katara’s footsteps crunching through the snow behind him. They both hit her with full force, hugging her tight. They’re both _safe_.

“It’s good to see you two again,” she says, patting both of their heads, “you’re looking healthy.”

“So, are you going to introduce your grandmother to your entourage?” Hakoda asks from behind them. Sokka and Katara both pull out of the hug, looking back round at the group all standing awkwardly next to Appa.

“Right, of course!” Sokka says, “Dad, I’m sure you remember everyone.”

Hakoda nods, “Good to see you all again. Suki, it’s been a while.”

Suki steps forward and shakes his hand in the traditional Water Tribe grip, “It’s good to see you, sir.”

“I told you, Hakoda.”

“Right,” Suki says, smiling.

“Gran Gran,” Katara says, “this is Aang, Toph, and you remember Suki from her visit? Guys, this is Gran Gran.”

“Yes, of course,” Kanna says, smiling at each of them, “lovely to meet you. You can call me Kanna. I’m glad to see these two have been making good friends. I hope they haven’t been causing too much trouble at university.”

“Only the usual amount,” Toph says with a grin.

“Ah, I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

“Come on, you lot must’ve been travelling for a long time. Let’s get you some real food,” Hakoda says, leading the group through the village to their igloo. Sokka walks ahead with him and gets a nudge in his side. “No Zuko?” Hakoda whispers.

Sokka shakes his head. “It’s a long story.”

Hakoda looks at him for a long moment. “I see.”

Sokka ignores him. “It feels like it’s been _forever_ ,” he says as soon as they step inside, the familiar smell of furs and fish and _warmth_ wiping away all the homesickness from the past few months. They all settle down on the floor, while Hakoda dishes out some sea prune stew they’d had on the fire.

“You lot are lucky my mother likes to cook enough for the entire village,” Hakoda says, handing out bowls with a smile.

“Well, you can never be too prepared for hungry mouths,” Kanna says.

Sokka’s pretty sure he’s going to finish his stew in about five seconds flat. He’s _missed_ Water Tribe food, more than anything. The others aren’t eating with _quite_ the same gusto, Toph and Suki eating at a slow pace, and Aang really hesitating.

“You’re not gonna finish?” Sokka asks him.

“No, I…uh, I’m not that hungry,” Aang says.

“Can I?”

“Go for it.” Aang hands Sokka his bowl, and Sokka finishes it before the others have even finished their first bowl. He’s sure he could keep going forever, but he knows by now to pace himself. He can eat more later.

“So,” Sokka says, putting his two bowls into the bucket for washing, “what’s going on with the invasion?”

“We really have no idea,” Hakoda says, “we’re hoping it’s nothing. It _could be_ nothing. A friend near the Fire Nation has heard…whisperings. Nothing concrete, no distinct plans. We’ve just got to wait it out and be on high alert.”

“Forever?” Katara asks. Sokka notices she’s finishing Suki’s bowl and gives Suki a scowl that’s met with a tongue sticking out at him. “What if they never come? We’ll just be watching out for years?”

“If it means they never come, and we keep the tribe safe, so be it.”

Katara sighs, “I guess.”

“I appreciate you kids coming, I really do,” Hakoda says, “but I don’t want you staying any longer past the end of the holiday. You’re not missing more classes because of this.”

“But-” Sokka starts.

“No. As soon as classes start, you’re going back to Ba Sing Se. You’re very privileged to be able to get an education there, you’re not missing out on that, and you’re not keeping your friends from that, either.”

Sokka silently hopes the invasion will come soon, then catches himself. He hopes the invasion will come _never_.

“Sokka,” Hakoda says, “how about you come help me scrounge up some beds for everyone?”

“What about _Katara_? She should help too.”

“Sokka,” Hakoda says, with the warning tone in his voice that means _don’t question my authority, I’m the adult here._ Sokka knows it’s a losing battle.

“But-”

“Katara is still eating, come on.”

Sokka gets up with a sigh, following Hakoda outside.

“So, tell me what’s going on,” he says as soon as the two of them are alone, in the short walk to someone else’s igloo.

“What do you mean?”

“You and Zuko,” Hakoda explains, “what’s going on there? From what I saw when I visited, I would’ve thought he would come with you. I would’ve thought he’d follow you _anywhere_.”

“Yeah, I don’t think so,” Sokka says, trying to picture Zuko having to fight against his own people, people he could _know_.

“Just because he’s Fire Nation?”

Sokka’s eyes go wide, “You know?”

They stop outside someone’s igloo then, and Hakoda ducks inside. He hears him chatting with someone, bubbly and conversational. Sokka knows he should probably follow and say hi, since he hasn’t been home in so long, but he’s not ready to put on some friendly façade while his dad’s in the middle of quizzing him about _this_.

Hakoda comes back out with three sets of bedding under his arm. “Of course I know.”

Sokka frowns.

“Your old man is smarter than you give him credit for,” Hakoda says, then laughs at Sokka’s expression, “okay, okay. Katara told me. She explained how you two had some…difficulties, when you first met.”

“You could say that again.”

“But things seemed pretty resolved when I was there. They’re not anymore?”

“No,” Sokka says with a dejected sigh, “he’s too…Fire Nation.”

Hakoda raises one eyebrow. “Did I really raise such a prejudiced son?”

Sokka’s mouth drops open, “I didn’t- I’m not- no!”

Hakoda simply keeps his eyebrow raised.

Sokka sighs. “He’s the prince of the Fire Nation,” he finally says, “the _prince_. And he didn’t tell me. He _lied_ , dad.”

“And if he had told the truth straight away, that would’ve changed things?”

“I don’t know,” Sokka says, then thinks about it, “no, I guess not. But he still _lied_. Toph knew from his clothes he was from some rich family, but he said _no_ , he’s just from a poor family on the mainland. And I _believed_ him.”

“Maybe he saw your reaction to him just being Fire Nation and he got scared of what it would be if you found out about his title.”

“ _So?_ He still should’ve told me.”

“That’s not fair to expect that of him, Sokka.”

“ _Why not_?”

“You don’t know the truth about his past, his family. Why would the Fire Nation prince be living in a tea shop in the Earth Kingdom?”

“I don’t _know_.”

“There might be a sad story there, Sokka.”

Sokka looks down at his feet, kicking the snow.

“If you don’t want to forgive him, that’s your choice. But…if he makes you happy, you should give him a chance to explain.”

“Why do people keep _saying that_?”

Hakoda smiles, “Katara’s talked to you?”

Sokka sighs. “You two and your _wisdom_. I prefer you when you’re cracking jokes.”

Hakoda puts an arm round him. “I’m sure you do. You should talk to him, Sokka. He might’ve even come along with you here.”

“I couldn’t ask that of him. Even if he disagrees, to fight his own _people_?”

Hakoda looks at him with a strange face.

“What?”

Hakoda shakes his head with a smile, “You’re angry at him for being the prince, but you wouldn’t ask him to fight the people that bring his nation down. You’re a strange boy, Sokka.”

“Hey, look who raised me.”

“That wolf pack to the East? Or maybe a polar bear dog?” Hakoda teases.

“Nah, I think they’d have done a better job.”

“Ha-ha, very funny, I’m sure they would’ve,” Hakoda says with a laugh, “do you think it’s too late for me to dump you on them?”

“I think you should give it a go, maybe there’s still hope for me yet.”

Hakoda laughs and ruffles Sokka’s hair, which is met with a groan because that’s his _wolf tail_ and now it’s a _mess_.

“I’m serious, though,” Hakoda says as Sokka reties his hair, “when you’re back in Ba Sing Se, you should talk to him.”

Sokka sighs. “You’d really be happy with me being friends with the Fire Nation prince? Son of the guy who, I don’t know, killed the mother of your children?”

Hakoda gives Sokka a _look_ , one that’s normally reserved for ‘Sokka, stop teasing your sister’, or ‘Sokka, you’re being a nuisance’. He supposes ‘Sokka, don’t bring my dead wife into this’ is a new one. “I’ve seen nothing bad from the kid, and he seems like he cares about you. Unless he does something to expressly hurt you, I’m all for the guy. Besides, I’ve had to watch your sister making eyes at a monk all afternoon, so it might be a nice change of pace.”

“I think you’re too kind for your own good,” Sokka says.

“I think you’re too self-sabotaging for your own good,” Hakoda retorts.

Sokka sighs, starting to think his family might be onto something. “I’m gonna go hunting,” he says, walking away.

“Wait, Sokka, I didn’t mean-”

Sokka stops, turning back ever so slightly. “I’m not- I’m fine, I just need to…think some things through. Send someone after me if any ships turn up.”

Hakoda nods and lets Sokka leave.

Sokka is a good hunter, he really is. But hunting takes _concentration_ , something he really doesn’t have the capacity for at the moment. At least, not for hunting. He goes through the motions, following tracks, watching from a distance and waiting for the right moment. But then he waits too long and loses the animal. So, he’s back to square one; following, watching, losing. It repeats relentlessly.

He knows his dad and Katara are right, of _course_ they are. He hates to admit it, because that means he was an asshole to Zuko and left things terribly between them for _nothing_. And now he’s going to be stuck waiting for an invasion for who knows how long, unable to fix things and apologise to Zuko. He really is an idiot.

A puffin seal appears from a hole in the ice, and Sokka’s body tenses, watching. He’s going to _focus_. He has to bring _something_ back. His thoughts still drift back to Zuko quickly. He wonders what would’ve happened if things had gone how they should’ve; if Azula hadn’t talked to Sokka and Zuko had had the chance to tell him the truth in his own time, with a more… _delicate_ _hand_ than Azula. Would Sokka have accepted it? Been angry? Been understanding? Would Zuko have told him _at all_?

Sokka lets out a sigh loud enough to scare the puffin seal back under the ice, and he slumps down against the rocky outcropping he’d been using to hide behind. How had he been so _stupid_? As soon as he heard the truth from Azula, he only thought about himself and how the truth affected _him_. He didn’t even take _one minute_ to consider why Zuko might not have told the truth. Even Iroh said it explicitly to Sokka, that Zuko has a bad history with his family that he might not want to discuss at first. Of _course_ he wouldn’t tell Sokka the moment they met.

Sokka’s been on the receiving end of the Fire Lord’s cruellest desires, and that was from half the world away through the hand of one of his admirals. He can’t even begin to imagine what it’s like to live under the same _roof_ as him. Sure, Zuko is his family, but that doesn’t mean a lot for some people. If he’s not _welcome_ in the nation his father rules, then surely something terrible must’ve happened. Sokka shudders at the thought of where Zuko’s scar came from, hoping desperately it was something as simple as a training accident, pushing down all thoughts of what else it could be. Still, Azula and Iroh’s words echo and circle around his mind. The way the spoke about it…that’s not how you talk about a simple training accident.

“Fuck,” Sokka mutters under his breath, kicking out at the snow in front of him, watching it fly up then drift back down slowly. Zuko has gone through something terrible and Sokka got _angry_ at him for not telling him about it straight away. How could he be such an _asshole_?

He wishes, desperately, that he could go back to Ba Sing Se right now. He wants to find Zuko, to tell him he was stupid and impulsive and didn’t think through his emotions. That he didn’t actually _mean_ any of it, he shouldn’t have been mad and Zuko has every right to not tell him these things. Sokka wants to tell him how he feels _properly_ , when he’s not angry and yelling at him. Even if Zuko doesn’t feel the same, he needs to _tell_ him. Even if Zuko will never forgive him for being an asshole, he has to try, at least. But, even on Appa, it’ll be a several week-long round journey and Sokka can’t risk leaving the South Pole for that long. The Fire Nation could easily come and go in that time. Sokka _can’t_ come home to his family hurt, or worse. Not again. He couldn’t protect his mother last time and he can’t let that happen to anyone else.

Sokka finds himself hoping that the invasion comes sooner, rather than later so he can see and talk to Zuko as soon as possible. He catches himself, _again_ , realising that he shouldn’t be hoping the invasion comes _at all_. As much as he wants to talk to Zuko, his family is the most important.

Through the haze of the snow, an orange blur appears in the sky. Sokka squints. No animals are _that_ colour, but as it gets closer Sokka recognises Aang’s clothes and the glider he’s hanging off of. His heart stutters and lurches into his throat. _No_ , Sokka thinks, _not yet._ He didn’t mean _this_ soon.

Aang lands softly on the snow in front of him, barely kicking up more than a light dusting of snow.

“How far away are they?” Sokka asks, getting up with a lot less grace. His hand immediately reaches over his shoulder for his boomerang.

“What?” Aang says with a frown, “Who?”

“The boats. The _invasion_. That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? I told my dad to send someone after me if…”

Aang frowns for a moment longer, before his face clears. “ _Oh._ No, no ones here. The tribes still safe. Kanna just told me to come fetch you for dinner.”

Sokka’s been out here _that long_? “What? But it’s still light-” He stops himself before he finishes _that_ idiotic sentence. Wow, he’s been away from home for longer than he thought. He hopes he’s not up all night with the sun, that’ll really make him a pathetic water tribesman. “Never mind,” he adds sheepishly.

The two start walking back to the village in silence, listening to the peaceful sounds of the snowy wind blowing past them and the distant rumbling of the ocean. Sounds of _home_.

“Have I been a complete asshole?” Sokka asks once they can start to see the village in the distance through the snow.

“What? When?” Aang asks, “You’ve never been-”

“To Zuko,” Sokka clarifies.

“Oh.”

“Yeah. I mean, his dad is the _Fire Lord_. I can’t even begin to imagine what that does to a person, what kind of childhood he must’ve had. And I got _annoyed_ at him for him not wanting to talk about it.”

“Not _really-_ ”

“Essentially, yeah.”

“Sometimes no one’s in the right,” Aang says.

“What?”

“Sometimes situations are just…bad. And there’s no right or wrong answer. You weren’t wrong to get annoyed at Zuko, you’ve got your own past that puts your defences up against people from the Fire Nation. But Zuko wasn’t wrong to hide the truth about his past, if it’s something traumatic for him.” Aang shrugs, “It’s just a bad situation.”

That, more than anything anyone else has said, starts to ease the knot in the pit of Sokka’s stomach. It is a bad situation, he knew that much, but he never thought of it _that_ way.

“So, I _wasn’t_ an asshole?”

“I never said _that_ ,” Aang says with a smile and a glint in his eye, “I mean, obviously, you could’ve handled the situation a little more… _delicately_. But it doesn’t mean you weren’t justified. Same with Zuko; it was wrong to lie to you, but it was still justified.”

“Right,” Sokka says, and wonders if this is what happens when you’re raised by monks. “What should I do, then?”

“What do you _want_ to do? Do you still want to be friends with Zuko?”

Sokka tries to consider it, weigh up the two sides, but he already knows his answer and he’s kidding himself if it could ever be anything else. “Yes,” he says, “no. I don’t want to be _just_ friends.”

Aang’s eyes light up at that, “Are you going to tell him?”

“I kind of already did.”

“That doesn’t _count_.”

“What if he doesn’t feel the same?”

“Sokka,” Aang says, stopping completely in his tracks, “ _Sokka_. You’re supposed to be a smart guy.”

“What?”

“Have you _seen_ the way he looks at you?” Aang asks, staring at Sokka in disbelief, “Every time me and Zuko are hanging out, he _never_ shuts up about you. Ever. It would be annoying if it weren’t so sweet.”

“Really?”

“That guy is _obsessed_ with you.”

Sokka turns away, hoping to hide the blush creeping up his cheeks. Aang sounds so _certain_. That’s not…he couldn’t be _right._

Aang nudges him. “He likes you, without a doubt,” he says.

“But when I told him how I felt, he didn’t say anything back.”

“Probably ‘cause you were yelling at him.”

“Okay, you’ve got a point there.”

“So, you’re gonna talk to him?” Aang asks, bouncing on the balls of his feet, face beaming, “ _tell_ me you are.”

“When we’re back in Ba Sing Se, maybe.”

Aang clasps his hands together, resting them under his chin and staring at Sokka with wide eyes. “I can’t wait.”

Sokka shoves him. “You’re _not_ gonna be there.”

“But you guys are so _cute_!”

Sokka rolls his eyes, but he can feel the heat steadily increasing in his face. Time for a diversion. “What about _you_? Are you ever going to confess your love to my sister?”

“Wha- I- I’m not- _Sokka_.”

Sokka shrugs, “I’m just saying. You being all love guru helping me and Zuko doesn’t mean anything if you can’t even tell the girl _you_ like how you feel.”

“But what if _she_ doesn’t feel the same?”

“I’ve already _told_ you she does.”

“I don’t want to ruin our friendship.”

“So, you’d give up the possibility of a relationship with her on the off-chance it ruins your friendship?”

“ _Yes_.”

“Okay, even if she _didn’t_ like you – which she does – Katara isn’t the kind of person to stop being friends with someone over something like that. So just…go for it.”

“You think?”

“ _Yes_.”

“I’ll…think about it.”

Sokka rolls his eyes.

“Hey, you’re not talking to Zuko yet!”

“Because Zuko is _half the world away_.”

“Whatever, it’s an excuse.”

“You know it’s not, go and tell Katara.”

“But-”

“ _Tell her_.”

“So I have your blessing?”

“Oh, you just _know_ Katara would beat us both up if we even _considered_ having that conversation.”

“But you know what I mean. You don’t mind? I don’t want to lose _you_ as a friend, either.”

“Of course I don’t mind,” Sokka says, “I really couldn’t hope for someone better for her.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll talk to her.”

“Now?”

“ _Later_.”

“Fine,” Sokka says, rolling his eyes, but with a smile as the two of them walk back into the village, the warmth of cooking fires filling the air. Maybe everything will be okay, after all.


	17. Chapter 17

“What-” Sokka whispers to Aang while the two of them wash up, barely managing to get a word in edgeways as people walk past. “-is going on-” The village has been busy ever since they arrived, preparing for an attack, everyone in training, all hands on deck readying their defences. “-with you and Katara?”

Aang opens his mouth, then closes it immediately when Hakoda comes past, handing them some more bits that need cleaning. “Once you’re done, you wanna come out for some training, Sokka?”

Sokka nods. His muscles are aching and burning, but he still doesn’t want to stop. They’ve spent about a week back home now, and there hasn’t been a single moment of rest. When he’s not training with the other soldiers, he’s training with his friends, and when he’s not training with his friends, he’s training on his own. When he’s not training, he’s hunting, or cleaning, or cooking, or helping out around the village in some other way. It’s relentless, but at least it doesn’t give him a spare moment to think about the time passing between when he and Zuko last spoke, and how he left it between them.

“We’ll just be a few more minutes,” Sokka says.

“I’ll see you just outside the wall in ten?” Hakoda asks, “Bring your A-game.”

“Try and beat me, old man,” Sokka calls out as Hakoda walks away. He looks back to Aang.

“Nothing’s going on,” Aang says, his face a picture of misery.

“You talked to her?”

“I kind of, uh, kissed her?”

Sokka raises his eyebrows, trying not to think too hard about his sister _kissing_. Gross. “And?”

“She kissed me back, but…she said she needs some time. She can’t think about things like this when we’re preparing for an invasion.”

“Ahh,” Sokka says, rubbing the back of his neck, “I should’ve thought that part of this through.”

“I mean, I get it, I did choose the worst possible time to kiss her, but…the wait is _killing_ me. I keep wishing for the invasion to come sooner and then realise _what_ I’m wishing for.”

Sokka laughs, “I know how you feel. I keep doing it, too.”

Aang’s eyes go wide, “Really?”

“It’s killing me not to be able to see Zuko and apologise to him. He’s in Ba Sing Se _right_ now, thinking I hate him. The longer it goes on, the more I worry the damage is becoming irreparable.”

“Don’t say that,” Aang says, “Zuko will understand.”

“I hope so, but…”

“He will.”

Sokka doesn’t try objecting further, just wanting to push the thoughts out of his mind and go back to mindless working.

“I can finish this off,” Aang says, “you go train.”

“You’re sure?”

Aang nods, and Sokka doesn’t need telling twice before he’s running off to grab his weapons and meet his dad. Mindless violence will stop him thinking. He tried picturing Fire Nation soldiers, at first, trying to take his anger at the Fire Nation out on them, but his mind would always end up drifting back to Zuko anyway. So, he’s settled for not thinking at all, just going through the motions, perfecting his technique. By the time they invade, he’ll be able to fight back in his sleep.

It happens over breakfast. They’re all sat around eating, all enjoying the spare moment out from training after nearly three weeks of it, non-stop. The snow is gentle around them, a light gathering collecting on their shoulders. Sokka notices a grey piece fall to the floor next to the fire, and his heart stops.

He nudges Suki next to him, “Look…” he says, pointing at it, hoping for some reassurance that it’s just some ash from the fire, that it’s nothing to be worried about.

“Oh, no,” Katara says, but she’s not looking where Sokka’s pointing, she’s looking up at the sky, her neck craned back. Sokka and the others copy, looking into the white abyss above. But it’s no longer just white, it’s speckled, marred by black and grey snow falling down onto them. _No_.

A lump grows in Sokka’s throat, restricting his breathing and all but bringing his breakfast back up.

“No, no, no,” he mutters, the blood draining from his face. He’s seen black snow two times in his life and both times he’s lost someone important to him. Suddenly, Katara is next to him, on her knees and gripping his hand tight.

“We need to move,” she says. Sokka can’t look away from the snow above. “ _Sokka_ , we’ve prepared for this. We can do this.”

Sokka forces his attention away from the sky, meeting Katara’s terrified, tear-filled eyes. “We can do this,” he repeats with little enthusiasm.

Katara drags him up, and he can see the rest of the tribe moving into action around him, but Sokka’s limb are stiff, unwilling to move in his numb dread. The world is moving at double the speed while he’s stuck in slow motion.

“You should-” he starts, but it comes out croaky and hoarse. He clears his throat and tries again. “You should hide.”

“What?”

“ _Hide_ ,” Sokka repeats, getting control back over his voice, the numbness seeping away to be replaced with panic. “So that they can’t get to you.”

“Sokka, I’m one of the only benders we’ve got. Their boats will be filled to the _brim_ with firebenders. I need to protect the tribe.”

“And I need to protect _you_ ,” Sokka says, “I can’t lose you, too.”

Katara holds both his hands tight between hers. “You _won’t_ ,” she insists, “I’ll look after myself.”

“But-”

“Sokka, we need to move.”

Sokka knows he’s lost this argument, knows that Katara would never sit out of this fight and he could never realistically ask her to. He knows she, Aang and Toph are the tribe’s main defence, and he can’t risk taking that away.

They rush back home, Katara running ahead and dragging Sokka behind her. Once inside, their hands separate while they prepare themselves for this. Sokka’s hands shake as he straps his weapons to his body. He can _do_ this. He _prepared_ for this; he’s far more prepared for this than he was the past two attacks, he can _defend_ the tribe now. He takes a deep breath, steadying himself before he dips his fingers into the paint in front of him and goes through the carefully practiced and familiar movements until his war paint is finished. He can do this.

He goes back outside, where he can already see the ship fast approaching. Thank _La_ it’s only one. Sokka joins the rest of the warriors, ready to fight.

The ship stops mere inches before hitting the first house. Sokka’s stomach is in knots, waiting for the attack. He’s stood at the front of the group, alongside his friends, his father, other warriors. He’s been _preparing_ for this. Still, he never thought the day would actually come, had hoped this was past them, once and for all. That his mother had been the last of the victims in the South. He steps ever so slightly forward and towards Katara, so he can easily block any attacks coming her way. He knows it won’t last long, but he can do his best.

The front of the ship opens and lowers, a ramp for the soldiers to come out. They’re all waiting with bated breath; they could attack now, easily. They could attack the ship, attack the soldiers before they even _leave_ , but…they all share the same thought. _Maybe it won’t be like last time_ , _maybe it’ll be peaceful_. Deep down, they all know they’re wrong. Still, they wait.

The ramp hits the ground with a resounding thud that echoes in Sokka’s chest. A figure stands in the new opening. Slowly, in a threatening procession, the soldiers walk down the ramp. Leading the group is a small figure, but Sokka’s not looking at her. He’s looking just behind her, the solider flanking her. He’s in full Fire Nation armour, helmet and all, but Sokka would recognise him in a heartbeat.

The ground all but falls out from underneath him, and Sokka doesn’t know how he’s still standing. His arms and legs feel numb, his heart frozen in his chest. If it weren’t for the pounding of blood in his ears, he’d think it’d stopped beating entirely. A wave of nausea rises through his body and it takes everything Sokka has not to throw up all over the snow. He’d been waiting to see his face, to be reunited with him, to tell him how he felt. But not _here_ , not like _this._

Zuko’s expression mirrors exactly how Sokka is feeling, his face drained of blood and eyes wide. He hesitates in his path and Sokka can see his mouth moving but isn’t close enough to hear what he’s saying.

“ _No_ ,” Katara says next to Sokka, her breath rushing out in one long gust. Sokka can’t even bring himself to breathe. He doesn’t look at Katara, eyes fixed ahead. Azula, still in front of Zuko, is talking back to him, mouth moving silently. He doesn’t know what either of them are saying, but Azula looks angry and Zuko looks scared. They exchange some brief words, then continue on their walk down to the end of the ramp.

Zuko is _so close_ to him, only a few metres away. Their eyes are locked on one another, neither able to tear them away. Why is he _here_ , what is he _doing_?

“I was hoping you’d be here,” Azula says, and for a moment Sokka thinks she’s looking at him, except she’s looking just past him, at _Katara_. “Didn’t want to have to waste a journey.”

“What?” Katara says. Sokka still doesn’t look away from Zuko.

“Surrender your _waterbender_ ,” Azula says, voice filled with venom as she addresses the tribe. “And there won’t need to be a fight.”

“We’re not surrendering _anyone_ ,” Hakoda says, stepping forward and in front of Katara.

“Dad, maybe we should-” Katara starts.

“ _No_ ,” Hakoda insists, “ _no one_ is surrendering.”

“Fine, have it your way,” Azula says, infuriatingly nonchalant, “your loss. Zuzu, you know where you’re needed.”

“Azula-” Zuko tries, eyes not breaking contact with Sokka.

“Zuko, need I remind you-”

“Okay,” Zuko says, shoulders slumping imperceptibly. Sokka wouldn't have noticed if he weren't so entirely in tune with his mannerisms. Zuko breaks away from his and Sokka’s shared look, tearing away their contact, and it’s like Sokka is snapped out of a haze, a bucket of ice water hitting him in the face as Zuko’s eyes refuse to meet his. Zuko is _here_. With Azula. The prince and princess. They must be on order from their father to do…what? Capture Katara? Sokka doesn’t _understand_. He thought Zuko wasn’t part of the Fire Nation anymore, wasn’t in contact with his father. _So why is he here?_

Azula conjures a blue flame in her palm, and all hell breaks loose. The two opposing forces meet, Fire Nation soldiers against Water Tribe warriors. Sokka can see Hakoda and Katara fighting off Azula in his peripheral vision, but he has no idea what everyone else is doing. He can hear swords clashing, fire bursting, but it all dulls down into an incomprehensible buzz because _Zuko is approaching him_.

He’s slow and hesitant, dual swords ready in front of him. Sokka can’t move, his feet frozen to the ice beneath him. Is Zuko about to…attack him?

“Wha-” Sokka starts when Zuko is close enough, finally kicking into action to dodge a swing from one of his swords. “Zuko?”

“I’m sorry,” Zuko says, though his actions indicate anything _but_ remorse. He swings the other sword towards him, and this time Sokka catches it with his own, holding him off only momentarily.

“What- what are you _doing_ here?” Sokka says, his voice sounding broken and childish, _betrayal_ oozing from every syllable.

“I’m _sorry_ , Sokka,” Zuko says, drawing both swords back and sweeping them low to the ground. Sokka only just manages to avoid them.

“ _Sorry?_ ” Sokka asks, incredulous, “Then stop _attacking_ me!” He punctuates his word with a swing of his sword, not aiming to hurt, just…he doesn’t know what. Zuko stops it easily between his swords.

“I don’t…I didn’t want to do this,” Zuko says.

“Is this some kind of…of… _revenge_? Because I got mad at you?” Sokka questions, using his other hand to grab his boomerang off his back while Zuko is distracted holding his sword back. He swings it, hitting Zuko across the head with it. It dislodges Zuko’s helmet, falling to the ground, while Zuko stumbles backwards. He even has the audacity to look _hurt_.

Zuko doesn’t put his helmet back on but _does_ kick Sokka’s boomerang away where it fell to the floor. _Fine_ , Sokka decides, _two can play at that game_.

“No, Sokka, I swear,” Zuko says, blocking Sokka’s new attacks, “my father-”

“ _Right_ ,” Sokka interrupts, “your _father_.”

Sokka aims to disarm, getting increasingly frustrated every time Zuko easily blocks all his attacks. Sokka can’t believe he’d decided to _move on_ and forget his father was the _Fire Lord_. How can he just _forget_ that? Zuko lied; he _is_ welcome in the Fire Nation; he’s _working for the Fire Lord_. All that he’d listening to about Sokka’s life as a result of the Fire Nation’s determination to destroy waterbenders, and now he’s _helping them do it._

“I don’t _believe_ you,” Sokka spits, “I _trusted_ you.”

“You _hated_ me.”

“I never hated you,” Sokka says, halting his movements for a moment. Zuko doesn’t attack. “I was annoyed, but…I didn’t…”

Zuko’s eyes widen and he just stands there. Sokka uses the opportunity to go for one of his swords, managing to knock it to the ground before Zuko can pull himself back together. Sokka kicks it away. Zuko narrows his eyes and conjures a flame in his now free hand. Sokka’s heart stops, his entire body freezing in fear, the flames dancing in front of his eyes, heat just touching his face.

Zuko extinguishes the flame quickly, settling for one sword instead.

“What? You’ll attack me but you won’t _firebend_?” Sokka yells, swinging his sword with no technique, no plan, just _anger_. “I can’t believe I thought you were different. Thought you were a victim of him, too. You _tricked_ me. The Fire Lord has you in his pocket, just like everyone else.”

“No, Sokka, I-”

“STOP!” Azula yells, voice powerful across the flat land. “No one move, or the waterbender gets it.”

Sokka looks over, heart gripped in panic. Azula has Katara tight against her body, one hand holding her there and the other holding a blue flame _far_ too close to her face for Sokka’s liking.

“No one else need get hurt,” Azula says, “we’ll take our prisoner and be done with this.”

Azula starts to walk backwards, towards the ramp, dragging Katara with her. Hakoda lunges forward, but Azula shoots a blast of flames at him.

“Ah, ah, ah,” she tuts, “one more slip-up like that, and your precious little girl won’t be so pretty anymore.”

“Dad, it’s fine,” Katara insists.

“Pleasure doing business with you all,” Azula says, now on the ramp. She glances over at Sokka, stood frozen in front of Zuko. “Actually, no. I change my mind. Take the brother, too.”

A couple of soldiers make a move towards Sokka, but Azula stops them.

“No,” she says, “let _Zuko_ take him.”

Zuko pales. He grabs his sword off the floor and slides the two of them back onto the sheath on his back. “I’m sorry,” he whispers, taking Sokka’s wrists oh-so-gently and leading his towards the ramp. Sokka doesn’t even both fighting against it. Zuko’s hands are hot around Sokka’s wrists and it’s a burning reminder of all those touches they’d shared before; gentle, loving touches, now nothing more than prison manacles.

Sokka gets a brief glimpse back at the rest of the tribe; some injured but all still standing as far as he can tell. Hakoda, Aang, and Suki are all watching in horror as he and Katara are dragged into the ship. Aang is holding his staff tight, and Sokka knows _exactly_ what he’s thinking. He shakes his head, just enough for Aang to see, but it’s not enough. He runs up to the ramp.

“Let them go!” He yells. Hakoda runs forward to grab him while Toph takes the faster route of bending the ground beneath his feet to drag him back, then encasing his feet in rock to stop him moving again.

“Aang, it’s okay,” Katara calls out, “we’ll be okay.”

“Will we?” Sokka asks Zuko, fixing him with an unwavering glare. Zuko looks away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm so sorry


	18. Chapter 18

“Let me out!” Sokka screams, his voice hoarse, “Let me see her!” He bangs on the unyielding metal door with no luck. He _knows_ there’s a guard out there, but he still doesn’t get any response. After the ramp had closed behind them, Katara and Sokka had been separated, their weapons removed, and both of them taken away by two different guards. Sokka was led off to a small room with nothing more than a bed and a small bathroom. Sokka hasn’t seen Zuko or Azula since they got on board, has heard nothing but the occasional exchange of guards outside. He doesn’t _understand_. What do they want with Katara? With _him_? And _why is Zuko with them_?

He gives up on banging on the door and starts pacing his room, taking it all in. There’s a small window, sealed and unopenable, near the ceiling. Not large enough for Sokka to fit through even if he could find a way to break it. Other than that, there’s just a bed screwed onto the floor. He looks closer, searching under the bed, around the corners of the room, for _anything_. Something that could be used as a weapon, something that could get this _door_ open. But there’s nothing. Of _course,_ there’s nothing.

Sokka sits on the bed, considering. Thinking. Planning. At least, trying to. He’s not in the right frame of mind to plan anything, he can’t stop thinking about Zuko. He’s _here_. He invaded with the Fire Nation, he _attacked_ Sokka, and captured him. It doesn’t make any sense; last time they’d spoken Zuko had said he had no ties left with the Fire Nation and he wasn’t welcome. Being on board one of their ships and leading an invasion hardly acts as evidence for that. Did Sokka do this? Did him arguing with Zuko somehow…push him to join the raid?

Sokka’s chest aches, still unable to fully process this or wrap his head around it. Did Zuko have this in him all along? Was it really all a lie? Was Sokka _right_ and their friendship was just all a scheme to figure out information about the Southern Tribe?

The rhythm of the waves around him, hitting into the side of the boat, makes Sokka feel nauseous. With every passing moment, they get further and further away from the South Pole, and closer to the Fire Nation. Sokka wants to scream and cry and hit _something_. Sure, he might be safe locked up in a room right now, but he has no idea where Katara is. There’s nothing saying she’s in the same position as him, they could be doing _anything_ to her right now; she’s obviously the reason they invaded, she could be dead before they reach the Fire Nation. Realistically, she’s lucky she’s even made it so far as to be on board the boat. Their mother didn’t get the same luck.

After enough hours, Sokka falls asleep. His guard is still up; he’s on edge being in the unfamiliar metal environment, but the exhaustion overtakes him, and he falls asleep on the hard, metal bed.

Sokka wakes up to the lock clicking and turning, his heart seizing up in his chest. Someone’s coming in. He hadn’t prepared for this, hadn’t thought of a plan to escape as soon as he was given the opportunity. But the door is creaking open and Sokka needs to act _now_.

He reaches for his shoe. It’s the hardest thing he’s wearing, the sole thick to keep out the snow. He might not have a real weapon, but he has to try _something._ If he can just _stun_ the guard, only for a moment…

Sokka starts to pull off his shoe, but then recognises the familiar pressure against his calf, the straps of the sheath wrapping around it disturbed when he moves his shoe. His _knife._ The guards hadn’t thought to check his shoes, and he’d completely forgotten it was even there. _Perfect._

The knife is reassuring in his palm, hard and _dangerous_. Sokka braces himself, watching the door push open, ready to attack the guard behind it, find Katara and _escape_. Somehow. He can do this.

The guard steps fully into the room, but it’s not a guard.

Sokka’s breath is sucked out of his lungs all over again at the sight of Zuko, the confirmation that this is _real_ and he’s _here_ hitting just as hard as the original punch to the stomach of seeing him walk off that ship. He’s in less armour, but still protected. He’s holding a tray in front of him, with some food. Sokka’s stomach grumbles at the sight of it.

Slowly, Zuko kicks the door shut behind him. Neither of them breaks eye contact, and Sokka feels entirely unable to move, the knife still held out in front of him, pointing directly at Zuko.

“Are you going to attack me?” Zuko asks eventually. That’s _rich_.

Sokka stands his ground for a moment longer, gripping the knife tight enough that his knuckles ache. He _wishes_ he had the guts to attack Zuko, that he could forget everything between them and just _go_ for it. But he can’t. Looking at him, his dark hair falling around his eyes, a deep bruise-like ring under his eye, Sokka can’t. Zuko looks _tired_ ; it’s in the shape of his shoulders, the darkness of his eyes, the pale skin stretched across his cheeks. If he’d seen Zuko like this back in Ba Sing Se, he would’ve dragged him straight to bed and stayed with him until he got some good sleep.

But things aren’t like they were in Ba Sing Se. Maybe it was hopeless after all; the city was a place where they could forget about the truth of what’s gone on in their lives, in the world. They could exist together separate from that, as if none of it had never happened. But it was really unrealistic to begin with, a Fire Nation _prince_ with a Southern Water Tribe peasant. How could Sokka think anything like that would work out? Even without the history between their nations, between their families, Sokka could never have a future with someone like Zuko. He’d been kidding himself that he and Yue would have a future together, even if she hadn’t turned into a celestial spirit. Even if, _evidently_ , Sokka seems to be drawn to royals, he knows he doesn’t have a future with them.

Sokka slips the knife back into his boot, slumping onto the bed in defeat. Zuko puts the tray on the floor and slides it across to Sokka, before sitting down himself, back against the wall.

“Why are you acting like we’re friends?” Sokka asks, intentionally aiming to hurt. He wants Zuko to feel the way he’s made him feel.

It only flickers across Zuko’s face briefly, but Sokka immediately regrets the question as soon as he sees the hurt on Zuko’s face, his eyebrow pulling in and eyes glistening.

“You should eat,” Zuko says, now keeping his eyes down and avoiding Sokka’s.

Sokka stares at the food in front of him. If Zuko wants him to eat, he wants to go on some kind of hunger protest. Except…it smells _warm_ and _good_ and Sokka is _hungry_. Without a word, he picks up the tray and starts eating. He needs his strength up if he’s going to escape, anyway.

“Can we talk?” Zuko asks after a while.

“Fine. Where is Katara?”

“Sokka-”

“What have you _done_ with my sister?”

Zuko sinks even further into himself. “I can’t tell you.”

“Then we have nothing to talk about.”

“ _Please_ ,” Zuko says, his voice desperate, “I- I didn’t think you’d be here.”

“So, what? You were just going to kidnap my sister and hope I didn’t notice? And nothing would change between us?”

“ _No_ , I-” Zuko sighs. “I didn’t think _either_ of you would be here, I hoped-”

“That you could slaughter our tribe then be back to Ba Sing Se before I even realised you were gone?”

“Let me _talk_.”

“There is _nothing_ you can say to me.”

“Sokka, I didn’t have a choice.”

“There is _always_ a choice.”

“I thought you hated me!”

Sokka crosses his arms. _Let_ Zuko think he hates him.

“So that’s why you’re here! Because you think I _hate_ you, so that’s enough of an excuse to _attack my people_ and _capture me and my sister_?”

“No, I-” Zuko cuts himself off with a frustrated groan. “I don’t mean- I’m-” Zuko sighs. “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t care.”

“I mean it, Sokka.”

“If you’re sorry, let us go.”

“I can’t.”

“Then leave me alone.”

“But-”

“Goodbye, Zuko.”

Sokka sits in silence until Zuko gives up and leaves, the door slamming shut behind him and the heavy click of the lock reminding Sokka that he has no power here. Except, now he has his knife, and Zuko didn’t take it away from him. He could still escape yet. He just needs to figure out where Katara is and be done with this.

The routine makes itself clear soon enough. Twice a day, Zuko comes in to give Sokka food. He apologises, Sokka ignores him, they sit together in silence. With each passing day, Zuko spends more and more time in Sokka’s room. Nothing happens, they both stay entirely silent, just sitting in one another’s company. It annoys Sokka; having Zuko there, spending time with him, as if things are…normal. As if he isn’t Zuko’s prisoner. His presence is simultaneously comforting and upsetting; having someone familiar giving him food and spending time with him, rather than a faceless guard, is nice, but it’s also a reminder of the fracture separating them and every single time Zuko opens that door, his decision hits Sokka all over again. That he decided to be here, to side with his sister and father, to attack Sokka.

“Katara is okay,” Zuko says, after a long silence, Sokka having long finished eating. It surprises him and for a moment he’s vulnerable, thankful for the information and reassurance that at least Katara’s _alive_. At least they can still escape together, eventually. If Sokka ever figures out a plan. But then he closes himself off again. Zuko had been the one withholding information, the one to _capture_ Katara. He shouldn’t be thankful for this scrap.

“Great, thanks for telling me you haven’t killed my sister,” Sokka says, voice filled with venom.

“I wouldn’t-” Zuko sighs and runs his hands through his hair, “they won’t hurt her. I can make sure.”

“ _Can_ you?”

“I will,” Zuko insists. “My father is planning something…big. The Fire Nation is doing so well, he wants to share our wealth with the world. You’ve seen how some places are. The lower rings of Ba Sing Se are in _poverty_. The Fire Nation can change that. If my father was in power…”

“Do you _hear yourself_?”

“What?”

“That’s not _sharing wealth_ , that a _dictatorship_ ,” Sokka says, and a wave of fear crosses Zuko’s face before he ducks it, hiding it from Sokka. “You…he’s _brainwashed_ you.”

“No- he- he _hasn’t_ ,” Zuko tenses up, his face a strange combination of panic and confusion, “this is my destiny. I have to help, it’s my birth rite. It’s…it’s the right thing to do. My father needs the avatar either on his side or out of the way, so-”

“What do you mean, the avatar? What about the avatar?” Sokka asks, panic lacing his blood. Do they _know_ about Aang?

“The…avatar? That’s why we captured Katara, we need-”

“ _Katara?_ ”

“Katara?” Zuko repeats.

Sokka actually laughs now, because of the ridiculousness of it. “The Fire Nation thinks _Katara_ is the avatar? That’s why you captured her?”

“Uh…yes?”

“She’s not the avatar, Zuko, so you might as well let us go now.”

“Yes, she is. She has to be. Maybe she doesn’t know it, but…”

“So, you think the Fire Nation will know better than she does herself? Katara isn’t the avatar, I can promise you that.”

“How do you know for sure?”

“Because…” Sokka hesitates. He can’t tell them about Aang because that’ll just put him at risk, too. He sighs. “I just know. She’s not.”

“But…”

“Trust me, Zuko,” Sokka says. Zuko doesn’t say anything response, just keeps frowning at an indiscriminate point ahead of him. “So, if you took Katara because you thought she was the avatar, why did you take me?”

“I don’t know,” Zuko says, but Sokka knows him well enough at this point to be able to tell that he’s lying, and not doing a very good job at it.

“You’re lying.”

“No, I’m not.”

“I _know_ you, Zuko.”

Zuko sighs, looking down at his feet. “It was Azula. She needs leverage over me,” he mumbles, and Sokka has to strain to hear him.

“Leverage? Why?”

Zuko shrugs, “To keep me in line.”

To keep him in _line_? Why would having _Sokka_ around do that?

“Wha-” Sokka starts, but Zuko’s standing up, collecting Sokka’s tray with robotic movements.

“I should go,” he says.

“Wait, Zuko-”

“No, I need to go.” Zuko knocks on the door twice, and it swings open and shut, Zuko disappearing through the gap. The lock clicks shut, and Sokka’s left alone, in silence. With _lots_ to think about.


	19. Chapter 19

Sokka can’t stop thinking about what Zuko said. He’s _leverage_ to keep Zuko in line. What does that even _mean_? The image of Zuko, tired and defeated, runs through his head over and over. This _isn’t_ Zuko, he decides. It _can’t_ be. His anger is slowly giving way to fear, fear for Zuko, confusion over his behaviour, but mostly fear over _why_ he’s doing this. The way he spoke about his father, the _fear_ that filled his face when Sokka spoke against him, it’s not normal, even with the Fire Lord as a father.

He wants to talk to Zuko again, to ask him more questions, to _understand_ , but Zuko stops coming. Instead, guards deliver his food each day, with no Zuko. Every time the door starts to open, Sokka gets his hopes up, but with no luck when he sees just another unfamiliar guard. Still, he tries to keep his hopes high every time.

It gets increasingly difficult, after a few days of it. On the third day, Sokka doesn’t even look up when the door opens. He stares at the Fire Nation boots now stood in the doorway as they kick the door shut behind them.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said,” Zuko says.

Sokka looks up, meeting Zuko’s eyes, wide and wary. His hopes soar back up, but he keeps his defences up. He can’t jump into this, not straight away. As much as he wants to, he still doesn’t know if he can trust Zuko.

“About my father,” Zuko continues when Sokka doesn’t respond. “Do you really think…is that really true?”

Sokka just looks at him. He can’t convince Zuko of his father’s corruption. He doesn’t know what’s going on, not really. He doesn’t know why Zuko’s doing what he is, he doesn’t know what the Fire Lord is doing, he doesn’t know any of it.

“He says this our way of sharing our greatness with the world,” Zuko says, “he can’t…it can’t be a lie.”

Sokka stays quiet, watching Zuko sink to the floor, hands in his hair.

“I thought Zhao was acting independently. With everything you said, I didn’t think that was my _father_. But…me and Azula being here, that’s his _direct_ order. It doesn’t make sense. If it was _him_ , all along…” Zuko sinks further into himself. “I didn’t mean to get involved in this, I’m sorry, Sokka.”

Sokka is silent for a long moment, just watching Zuko get smaller.

“Then why?” he says eventually, and he’s surprised by the hoarseness of his voice. He supposes not speaking for days will do that to you. Zuko jumps from the sound of his voice, and stares at Sokka with wide eyes. He can’t _bear_ it, can’t bear to see him look at him that way, his eyes wide and hopeful.

“What?” Zuko says, shifting his entire body to face Sokka.

“Why,” Sokka repeats, “why are you doing this?”

Zuko slumps again, his eyes dipping away from Sokka’s. “It’s a long story.”

“Does it excuse you kidnapping me and my sister?”

Zuko looks back up then, eyes filled with a broken sadness that Sokka aches to sooth. “I didn’t want it to be like this. I swear. It’s my family, they-”

“You can’t blame everything on them, Zuko.”

“I know,” Zuko says, with a sigh. “Azula said that if I helped capture the avatar, I’d be allowed home. She said my father would… _let_ me come home. I doubt she was telling the truth, in hindsight. This is a game of hers, that’ll be the only reason she wanted to capture you, too. To screw with me. And to make sure I don’t change my mind. She knows if she’s got access to you, she’s got control of me. It’s a…backup plan.”

Sokka doesn’t want to offer him sympathy, not now, not like this. But he can’t help it, can’t help feeling the swelling in his chest that oh so desperately wants to reach out to Zuko, to pull him close to him and tell him it’s all okay. But he can’t. Zuko betrayed him.

Zuko pulls his knees to his chest, hugging them tight. “She’s trying to put a wedge between us, by dragging me along here, by making me fight you and capture you,” Zuko looks up at Sokka, longing eyes reaching out to him, “I don’t think she realises I already ruined it all myself.”

Sokka just about tears his heart in two trying to decide what to say next. He wants to tell Zuko that he _didn’t_ ruin it, of course he didn’t, that Sokka was just being an _idiot_. But, being with Zuko here now, remembering the hurt he’d felt from finding out the truth, a scabbed over sore that’s been reopened by the invasion, he can only think of one thing to say. When he speaks, his voice comes out small, a broken child. “Why did you lie to me?”

Zuko is silent for a long moment, just looking at Sokka.

“I was ashamed,” he finally says, “I knew I wasn’t welcome as part of the Fire Nation or my family. I saw the way you reacted to me, and it made me ashamed to be a part of this. I didn’t think…I was just trying to get by. My father said that if I got my degree like Azula, if I prepared myself to rule the nation, then maybe I’d be able to return home. So, I did it. I was so desperate to pass, to make sure I was pleasing my father, that I just wanted to smooth things over with you so I wouldn’t fail the class. I didn’t think about what lying to you would mean. And then you told me about what my father’s done to you, to your people, and I was ashamed. I didn’t want you thinking of me the same way you think of Zhao and my father.”

“You still should’ve told me,” Sokka says, “it wasn’t fair. After everything I told you-”

“I know,” Zuko says, hanging his head in shame, “I’m sorry. I wish I could take it back. All I can say is I’m sorry. I’m sorry for lying to you, for endangering you, for helping Azula capture you and Katara… I’ve been blinded by trying to please my father.”

“Why does it matter so much?” Sokka asks, “Why do you need his approval? Why do you need to go home?”

“It’s my _home_ , Sokka. He might be the Fire Lord, but he’s still my father. He’s still…I’ve still spent my entire life trying to earn his approval. When I was banished…”

“You were _banished_?” Sokka asks, incredulous. _Banished_ is a lot more severe than just _not being welcome_. At least that explains the contradictory books in the library, like Zuko had been erased from Fire Nation history. So, the Fire Lord _banished_ his own son?

Zuko frowns, “I thought you knew that now.”

“You never said _banished_. How the hell does a prince get banished?”

“By being a coward,” Zuko answers, plain and detached.

“ _What?_ ”

Zuko avoids Sokka’s eyes, clearly uncomfortable. He shuffles in his position, hugging his knees tighter.

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t-”

“No, it’s fine,” Zuko interrupts, “you should know. I want to tell you.”

Zuko takes a deep breath, releasing his knees and crossing his legs in front of him. He closes his eyes, breathing deeply for a few moments, before he opens them again. Sokka waits patiently.

“When I was thirteen, my uncle let me come into a royal meeting,” Zuko starts, “I knew I was to be the Fire Lord one day, so I wanted to know what went on behind the scenes. But I spoke out of turn. It was something entirely inconsequential, but it was rude. I’d disrespected one of the officials, and in turn my father.”

“That’s enough to get you _banished_?” Sokka questions. Zuko gives him a harmless glare and Sokka shuts up.

“There’s only one thing to do in a situation like that, me disrespecting the man’s honour, an Agni Kai,” Zuko hesitates at Sokka’s frown, “a firebending duel," he explains. "I accepted. I expected to be fighting the official I’d spoken out against, which I thought I could manage. I wasn’t, I was fighting my father.”

“Your father challenged his _thirteen-year-old_ _son_ to a duel?” Sokka questions, his brain finding it difficult to wrap around it. He, obviously, knew the Fire Lord was an asshole. But to treat his own _son_ like that? He tries to imagine facing his father in anything more than simple training and harmless games. He shudders at the thought. Even now, Hakoda would easily outmatch Sokka, let alone at thirteen.

Zuko nods solemnly. “I refused to fight. He was my father, I couldn’t. It was the ultimate sign of cowardice and extremely dishonourable. So, he taught me a lesson.”

Sokka can’t move, can’t even breathe, waiting for what comes next. Iroh and Azula had both mentioned Zuko’s scar in tandem with him leaving the Fire Nation. It’s a _firebending_ duel, he _knows_ what comes next, but he doesn’t want to picture it, doesn’t want to even think it, in the hopes that it might not be true. His _father_.

“I begged for his forgiveness, for him not to go through with the Agni Kai. He, obviously, disagreed.” Zuko takes a deep breath, one hand coming up to lightly touch the scar tissue under his eye. “I was grovelling on the floor. He grabbed me by the side of my hair to drag me up, to face him like a man. I refused. So, he kept his hand there, over my eye, over half my face, and…” Zuko stops to slow his breathing, pulling his knees back up, “you can guess what happened next.”

“Zuko…”

“He’s a powerful firebender. It takes a lot to burn a firebender. My entire left side was engulfed in flames. He still didn’t let up, despite my screams. I was silent by the time he stopped. I was still conscious, still _painfully_ conscious, but my voice was wrecked, burnt to shreds. I was lucky I got out with the damage I did; it could’ve been far worse.”

“He could’ve killed you,” Sokka says, barely a whisper. His body feels frozen in shock, picturing Zuko’s agonised cries, his burning flesh, his unyielding father.

“I know,” Zuko says, and the rasp in his voice, that’s _always_ been in his voice as long as Sokka’s known him, breaks his heart all over again. He can’t even imagine how different a thirteen-year-old Zuko would’ve sounded.

Sokka slips off his bed onto the floor, shuffling closer to Zuko until their knees are pressed together. He takes Zuko’s hands, prising them away from their tight grip on his legs. He squeezes them, tight, running his thumb over the light scarring on the back of his left hand.

“Zuko, I-” Sokka has no words, hardly even any thoughts to process what he’s just heard. He just keeps hearing his screams, over and over again. “Why do you still want his approval? After he did _that_ to you?”

“I lost my honour,” Zuko says, not meeting Sokka’s eyes, “losing an Agni Kai, let alone _refusing_ to fight one, is the most dishonourable thing you can do. I had betrayed my father, my nation. I was right to be banished.”

“ _No_ , you weren’t,” Sokka says, “how can you say that? You were a kid refusing to fight your father, you didn’t _deserve_ any of that.”

“I was out of line, he needed to-”

“No, Zuko.”

Zuko looks up, finally meeting Sokka’s eyes.

“I mean it. That’s not…that’s not fair,” Sokka says, “he shouldn’t have done that to you.”

Zuko still looks doubtful, watching Sokka with the smallest frown.

“I lost my honour,” he says, squeezing Sokka’s hands back, “I’m dishonourable in the eyes of my father. I need to… to _redeem_ myself in front of him.”

“He said that to you?”

“Azula told me they figured out where the avatar is, she didn’t tell me _who_ or _where_ , just that if I were to help capture them, then-”

“You could go home.”

“And restore my honour.”

“Zuko, no one has that kind of power over you,” Sokka says, “that’s something you do yourself. Not that you ever even _lost_ it to begin with, Tui, you were a _kid_.”

“But…”

“Do you really want to go home to someone like that? That would _hurt_ you like that? That…comes up with these _stupid_ criteria for you to come home?”

“He’s my father. I need to…being the Fire Lord is my destiny.”

“Is it what you _want_?”

“It…I don’t know. That doesn’t matter.”

“Of _course_ it does, Zuko. You’re the one that has to live with your decisions.”

“If that’s not my destiny, then…what is?”

“Whatever you _decide_ ,” Sokka says, “I don’t believe in destiny. I think we should just do whatever makes us happy and live our lives.”

Zuko frowns.

“What makes you happy, Zuko?”

Zuko, somehow, frowns harder. He stares at Sokka for a long, silent moment, holding his hands so tight between them.

“You,” he says, simply.

Sokka’s heart squeezes in his chest, fluttering and hitting against his ribs desperately trying to escape and wrap itself around Zuko. He holds it back, just barely. “Then why did you go through with it?” he asks instead of everything else clawing its way up his throat and trying to escape. “When you realised who it is, why did you still go ahead with it?”

“I didn’t know until we got off the boat,” Zuko says, “I was stupid and oblivious and trying to ignore the signs that were _obviously_ there. I didn’t want to go through with it. But…Azula told me if I didn’t, she’d _hurt_ you,” Zuko emphasises it with another squeeze of their hands, and Sokka thinks his circulation might go in a minute, but he still won’t dare to let go.

“You did it…to protect me?”

Zuko ducks his head in what Sokka can only interpret as shame. “I know it’s stupid, because I lied and you hate me, but I _couldn’t_ let her-”

“Wait,” Sokka says, “wait. I don’t hate you.”

“But I thought-”

Sokka shuffles even closer, so their legs are completely pressed together, their hands held tight between them. “I _never_ hated you,” he says, “I was upset, and annoyed, but I was being irrational. I never felt anything but…but _love_ for you.”

Zuko’s face stills, his eyebrow raising and eyes going wide. Sokka could stare at him forever.

“You were telling the truth? When you said that…before?”

Sokka nods.

“But…but…” Zuko’s cheeks are flushed, red creeping up his neck and across his face. Sokka can’t help it; he reaches one hand out and touches his unscarred cheek, his cool fingers soothing against the heat of Zuko’s skin. Zuko looks even more flustered by the contact. “Why _me_?”

“What do you mean, why you?”

“You could have _anyone_ , you could…there’s…Suki… _every_ girl in class looks at you.” Sokka raises his eyebrows. He really hadn’t noticed. But, he supposes, he did have _Zuko_ to be distracted by.

“They’re not _you_ ,” Sokka insists, bringing his other hand up to Zuko’s scarred cheek, feeling the uneven texture under his hands and running his thumb gently under Zuko’s eye.

“Sokka, you don’t…” Zuko starts, taking both of Sokka’s hands in his and pulling them away from his face. Sokka doesn’t even try to hide the offence written across his own face. “You don’t want this.”

“How do you know what I want?”

“Do I need to remind you who I am? I’m a firebender, I’m the _Crown Prince to the Fire Nation_ , my father is the _Fire Lord_. One day, I might be, too.”

“That’s nothing to do with who you _actually_ are,” Sokka says, getting increasingly frustrated by his hands being held away from Zuko.

“You’re wrong,” Zuko says, “it’s everything to do with who I am. You do…you’ll realise your mistake, soon enough. You’ll move on.”

“I won’t and I _don’t want to_.”

“Sokka, please.”

“No, Zuko, listen to me,” Sokka says, pushing Zuko’s hands off of his and wrapping them round the back of Zuko’s neck, pulling him in close until their foreheads are touching, cool against hot. “I’ve never, ever met anyone like you. You’re… _incredible_. I don’t care who your father is, I don’t care that you’re a firebender, I don’t care if your coronation is tomorrow. I like _you_ and no one else. I’m not going to…’realise my mistake’, I’m not going to ‘move on’. If you’ll have me, I will easily stick around forever. There’s _no_ getting rid of me. I don’t care what you do.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

Sokka looks at Zuko, then, really _looks_. He’s so close, features blurring in front of Sokka. He soaks in his eyes, bathing in the colour of them; one a perfect shimmering gold, the other a milky white. He takes in the redness across Zuko’s cheeks and nose, the deep, angry red of his scar, the perfect black of his eyebrow. Sokka wants to soak up every detail of him like he’ll go blind tomorrow, so he can forever remember Zuko’s face.

He closes his eyes, still seeing the imprint of Zuko’s against his eyelids. He feels the warmth of him soaking through his forehead, his light breath against Sokka’s face, his hands coming up to rest either side of Sokka’s cheeks, palms burning against his skin. They breathe into one another, a slow, careful rhythm. Then Zuko’s shifting, pushing forward and pulling Sokka’s face forward to meet him. Their lips touch with the barest of brushes and Sokka’s breath is pulled straight out of his lungs, his heart swelling far past the bounds of his chest. He pushes harder, deepening the kiss, holding Zuko’s neck tight to keep him against him, never wanting to let him go.

Sokka feels everything from the past few months rushing forward; his initial anger at Zuko, a thinly disguised veil of his attraction and the subsequent _fear_ of that attraction; the blossoming friendship between them that Sokka already so desperately wanted to be _more_ even if he didn’t know it; the _realising_ of his feelings for Zuko and the deep aching pain with realising that nothing could ever come of it; and the even more gut-wrenching pain that came with finding out the truth about Zuko, and knowing nothing really would ever come of his feelings.

All the feelings culminate into one wave of pure _relief_. Relief that Sokka hadn’t been too stupid and blind to confront his feelings about Zuko, to recognise that he can forgive him, and relief that Zuko feels the same and _is kissing him_. He lets this moment be an escape; for now, there is nothing more than just the two of them, slowly trying to become one. There’s no Fire Nation boat, no imprisonment, no Fire Lord, no looming war. Nothing. Just Sokka, and Zuko, and the feeling bubbling up between them that Sokka needs to get out now, now, _now._

Sokka breaks away with a gasp, putting as little distance as possible between them, just enough so he can see Zuko’s face. Sokka laughs, unexpected and loud in the quiet room. Zuko’s mouth is hanging open, his eyebrow drawn up and his eyes looking heartbroken at Sokka's pulling away. Sokka laughs against Zuko’s cheek as he kisses it, he laughs against the crease that’d formed next to his eyebrow, and finally he laughs against his mouth before he pulls away again.

“I love you,” he whispers, breath brushing Zuko’s lips. “I love you so much,” not feeling it captured quite enough the first time. He pulls Zuko close again, bringing their lips together once more and dissolving in his heat. Zuko’s hands fall from Sokka’s cheeks, reaching around his waist and pulling him even closer. Zuko is warm, so, so warm, a burning hot sun against Sokka’s face and wrapped around his body. Sokka feels like he’s on fire, like every piece of him is burning into the abyss, becoming part of Zuko’s radiating, all-consuming warmth. He could spend an eternity here, wrapped in the sun.

Sokka recognises that Zuko hasn’t said anything back, but right now he can’t bring himself to care. The way Zuko’s kissing him, he doesn’t need to hear it. He can feel the love flowing out of Zuko’s every pore. He pulls away for just a moment because both of their eyes are closed and Sokka’s starting to miss Zuko’s eyes. They keep their foreheads pressed together, holding each other tight, while Sokka gazes into the deep pool of gold captured in Zuko’s iris. He wants to crawl into the amber of Zuko’s eyes, forever preserved in this bliss.

“Wait,” Sokka says, remembering, “wait. You and Mai, you’re not…?”

Zuko frowns and tries to pull back, but the way they’re entangled Sokka just ends up coming with him. “Me and _Mai_? What?”

“You two aren’t…you know…together?”

“ _No._ No. We’re just friends.”

“Just friends. Right,” Sokka says, with a relieved smile. “So, I can keep doing this, right?” he adds, leaning back into Zuko’s lips.

“Right,” Zuko repeats against Sokka’s mouth, both of them smiling against one another too much to even kiss properly, but Sokka will be damned if he doesn’t try his best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> communication!!!


	20. Chapter 20

“Zuko,” Sokka whispers, not wanting to separate himself from Zuko but knowing he has to. As much as he wants to float in their moment of peace forever, the reality of their situation has been pulling at the back of his mind, slowly creeping its way to the front. “ _Zuko_.”

“Mmm?” Zuko responds, keeping his eyes shut, his dark eyelashes resting against his cheeks barely inches from Sokka’s face. Sokka forces himself to pull away, to put some distance between them, so he can _think_.

“I’m still your prisoner,” he says, slicing through the comfort and happiness in the air, exposing the stony reality.

“Oh,” Zuko says, opening his eyes and leaning back against the wall behind him. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” Sokka says, a dread building in his stomach that maybe this was a _mistake_ , maybe Zuko hasn’t changed his mind about the Fire Nation, maybe Katara _still_ isn’t safe, maybe…

“I don’t…I don’t know how to deal with Azula,” Zuko says, “it’s not like I can just…just _free_ you. It’ll mean an escape plan, and a _fight_.”

“You’re going to help us?” Sokka asks, not _doubting_ Zuko, but needing that confirmation, needing Zuko to _say_ it.

“I _want_ to. But…I don’t want to betray my family,” Zuko says, looking down at the floor, “but I can’t…I need you to be safe, too. Why do I have to choose? Why does it have to be this way? Why do I have to make _decisions_ like this?”

The dread creeps back up, freezing in Sokka’s stomach and his heart, ice reaching throughout him. “So, you’d just, what, kiss me then keep me prisoner?”

“ _No_. I just…I don’t know what’s right or wrong, anymore. Everything with my father, I grew up being told he was the greatest man in the world. But the things he’s doing…and _Azula’s_ helping. But he’s my father. And she’s my sister. We _grew up_ together. Is it really the right thing to go against them? They’re my family.”

“Just because they’re your family doesn’t mean they can’t be wrong,” Sokka says.

“I know, but why do _I_ have to go against them? Why can’t I just…I don’t know.”

“Let me and Katara be captured by your sister?”

“No! I just…don’t want to have to fight her. She can beat me, easily, and even if I manage to outsmart her, there’s no winning scenario. If I lose, you and Katara are captured by my father and I’m punished for my treachery. If I win, we escape but Azula has to go home, empty handed, unsuccessful. My father…he doesn’t take easily to failure. I _can’t_ leave her to face that.”

Sokka feels a wave of anger pass through him. How could someone treat their _kids_ like that? So they’re afraid of him?

“Zuko, if she’s made the decision to follow your father, I don’t know what else you can do,” he says.

“I know,” Zuko says, “but maybe I can convince her. Maybe she can _realise_ that he’s wrong, and she can- she could come _with_ us.”

Sokka is…doubtful, to say the least. But the hope in Zuko’s eyes slowly replacing the confusion; he can’t turn it down. “You can try. But if not-”

“I’ll be ready to fight her. If she chooses him over me.”

“Are you really ready to fight her?”

“No,” Zuko says, a quick response, “especially not with _you_ there. She outmatches me easily, and more than anything, she knows how to exploit people’s weaknesses.”

“I’m your weakness?” Sokka asks with a teasing smile.

“I already _told_ you that,” Zuko says, not picking up on Sokka’s teasing, “that’s why you’re _here_.”

“I know,” Sokka says, still smiling, “but I like to hear it.”

“It’s not _good_ , she could _hurt you_ , Sokka.”

“I’ve got you to look after me.”

“She can beat me, easily.”

“Okay, we’ve got Katara to look after both of us,” Sokka offers, “if we can manage to get her free before Azula notices, then we’re sorted.”

“That’s a big if.”

“Don’t underestimate my plan-making abilities.”

Zuko crosses his arms, “Okay, what’s your plan then?”

“Hmm,” Sokka says, leaning back on his arms, “do you know where Katara is? And where my weapons are being kept?”

“Your weapons are just in a storage cupboard. Katara is right in the heart of the ship, in the holding cell.”

“Wait, then where are _we_?”

“This is just some empty quarters.”

Sokka looks around, “Pretty miserable room.”

Zuko shrugs.

“Okay, so. Do you think you’d be able to sneak my weapons to me?” Sokka asks, back on track.

Zuko considers it for a moment, “Probably. If I do it while bringing you food.”

“Perfect,” Sokka says, “so, you bring me my weapons with the next meal. We _quietly_ deal with the guard outside. Then, I’ll go make a distraction like I’ve escaped by myself, to give you time to go get Katara. We’ll meet up outside, then Katara can waterbend us out of here to the nearest land.”

“Wait, wait,” Zuko says, “I don’t like the _distraction_ part. You’ll get Azula’s attention.”

“How about when you know she’s asleep, you come and let me out? I can fight a few guards, keep them distracted. By the time Azula’s woken up, we’ll all be together and ready to escape before she can get to us.”

“What if she wakes up and gets to you before I do?” Zuko asks, “I can’t risk that. We can go together to get Katara.”

“We won’t even make it that far; the guards will stop us long before we get to her. You can go to walk through the entire ship easily, I’ll keep the guards distracted. _You_ need to get her alone.”

“It’s too risky.”

“It’s the only option we’ve got.”

Zuko frowns, worrying the skin of his lip between his teeth. “Then we can wait. I can break you out when we’re in the Fire Nation, when Azula isn’t around.”

“You know that’ll be a million times harder,” Sokka says, “and we don’t know what they’ll do to Katara. We need to do it now, while we’re still slightly close to home. It’s our only option.”

“But-”

“Zuko,” Sokka insists, taking his hands, “I’ll be fine. I can handle myself.”

“Not against _Azula_.”

“It’ll work out, I promise. It has to.”

Zuko still looks uncertain. “Okay, fine. So, I’ll bring you your weapons with your meal tonight. Then, once Azula has gone to bed, I’ll come break you out.”

Sokka nods. “You’ll get Katara, I’ll cause a distraction. We’ll meet on the deck.”

“Are you sure about this?” Zuko asks.

“As sure as I’ll ever be.”

Sokka is antsy all day, pacing around the room and waiting for the moment they can get free. He can see out his window that they’re moving into warmer waters; they’re losing their chance. If they get too far, the closest land will be in the Fire Nation and Sokka’s not actually sure how far Katara would be able to take them, but he’s not about to tell Zuko that.

As soon as the door to his room opens, he jumps a mile, nerves and excitement sending a shot of energy through his body. Zuko comes in, tray in hand.

“Here’s your, uh, food,” he says, then coughs.

Sokka rolls his eyes at him but smiles as he kicks the door shut behind him.

“Thank you,” he says, sincerely, as Zuko pulls the different weapons out from where he’d hidden them under his shirt.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” Zuko asks, keeping a tight hold on Sokka’s hand after he passes over his boomerang.

“We can do this,” Sokka says with a nod, reassuring himself as much as Zuko. “Don’t worry about me. Focus on getting Katara.”

“Okay, yeah. We can do this.”

Sokka nods again.

“I should go, but…I’ll see you soon. When Azula’s asleep.”

“Good luck,” Sokka says, leaning forward to give Zuko a quick kiss, and relishing in the blush that immediately covers his cheeks.

Zuko smiles awkwardly, then ducks back out of the room, leaving Sokka alone with his weapons and nothing but time to wait. He eats his food quickly, then immediately regrets it when his stomach starts turning with nerves. He can do this, it’ll be fine. They’ll all be fine.

It’s not long before he starts pacing again, but it only lasts for a few minutes before he stops when he realises that he should probably be conserving energy the best he can. He takes a deep breath. It’s fine. He can do this.

Time passes painfully slowly, but Sokka had actually been starting to fall asleep when he’s woken up by loud banging outside his room. He jumps up quickly, drawing his sword. Zuko had said he’d open the door before trying to disarm the guard, so it would be two against one. Less risky. That’s _not_ what it sounds like outside.

The lock clicks open and Sokka holds his sword tight, prepared for the worst. Instead, he gets Katara sticking her head through the door.

“What?” Sokka says, dumbfounded. This wasn’t the plan. He panics that Katara came up with her own escape plan, but then Zuko sticks his head in as well. Katara glares at him.

“Things didn’t exactly go to plan,” Zuko says.

“It was a stupid plan,” Katara says, with another glare at Zuko.

“Hey, it was my plan,” Sokka says.

Katara looks at him. “Still stupid.”

“I managed to sneak into Katara’s cell to tell her about the plan,” Zuko starts explaining, “but-”

“But it was stupid. No _way_ are you running off to cause a distraction and getting yourself killed.”

“Better risk that than _all of us_ getting killed,” Sokka says.

“ _Zuko_ might be willing to risk your life, but I’m not,” Katara says.

“I’m not-” Zuko starts, voice high and offended.

“Okay,” Sokka interrupts, “we don’t have time for whatever is going on between you two. We need to go, plan or not.”

“Zuko is the one that captured us, Sokka,” Katara says as if Zuko isn’t stood right behind her, “can we really trust him?”

“Yes,” Sokka says, without a doubt in his mind, “now let’s _go._ ”

Katara sighs, but they start moving, keeping close together as they move through the ship. They encounter the occasional guard to deal with, but other than that things seem to go off without a hitch. It would never be _that_ easy, though.

Sokka sees the door ahead, out to the deck, where they can _escape_. His heart leaps in his chest, and he’s getting his hopes up too soon, thinking about their freedom _too soon_ , because next thing he knows, a figure is coming out of the shadows, a sinister smile on her face.

“Now where are you three off to in such a hurry?” Azula asks, looking between them but making no move to attempt to stop them.

Zuko’s hand goes to his swords on his back and just rests there, not taking them out.

“Azula, let us go.”

“Why would I do that?”

“You can come with us,” he says, and that _really_ gets a look from Katara. “You don’t have to listen to father anymore, you can…we can _escape_.”

“Escape from _what?_ Being worshipped? Having everything we could possibly desire?”

“From being… _pawns_ in our father’s game.”

Azula shakes her head. “You really want to give this up? For what? Two peasants and a life of nothing? You’d give up your _throne_ for that? You’d give up your _family_?”

“Azula, please, _listen to me_ ,” Zuko says, “we can leave, you don’t have to go home to father. We can _leave_.”

Azula sighs, “You always did take after mother more. I tried _so_ hard to get you home, to convince father to let you come home, and _this_ is how you thank me?”

“Please, Azula.”

“I’m not leaving, and neither are you,” Azula says, conjuring to bright flames in her palms. They all kick into action then, Zuko immediately diving for Azula before she can attack Sokka or Katara. Two guards appear out of nowhere, attacking Sokka and Katara from behind. They do their best to fight back, to hold them off, but Katara has no water and Sokka can hardly fight fire with a sword. The guards easily get control over them, holding their hands behind their backs, _tight_. The moment they’re captured, Azula stops fighting Zuko.

“See, Zuzu. You’re never going to beat father, so why bother?”

“And nothing _either_ of us do will _ever_ be good enough for him,” Zuko says, “all those stupid conditions about what I need to do to come home. Nothing I do will ever be good enough, and it won’t be long before he turns on you, too.”

Azula laughs, horrible and harsh in the silent corridor.

“You don’t think father planned this _all along_?” Azula says, voice twisted and bitter, “You really think just going to university would be enough to restore your honour?”

“What?” Zuko says, now quiet, confused, “What do you mean?”

Azula rolls her eyes, “This was _all_ part of his plan. He’s known about _her_ ,” she points at Katara in a way that makes Sokka’s blood boil, “for years. He’s just been biding his time.”

“ _What do you mean?_ ”

Azula sighs, “Oh, Zuzu. You think he cared about us going to university? And that two Southern Peasants just miraculously had the money to attend at coincidentally the same time as us?”

“Azula, _explain_ ,” Zuko spits, drawing his swords.

“Okay, okay,” Azula says, with a laugh, “you know how father feels about the avatar. Well, air was next in the cycle, and what a _tragedy_ the death of all those baby airbenders was. Next was water. Another _tragedy_ those deaths. But then there were reports that someone had slipped through the cracks, that there was a waterbender left. Unfortunately, Zhao didn’t get the memo, so he didn’t realise the avatar would’ve been a mere child, not a fully grown woman. Oh well, some sacrifices have to be made.”

“How _dare_ you,” Katara yells, but her mouth is quickly covered by the guard with a wave of Azula’s hand.

“It was a long time before father realised Zhao’s mistake. By then, it was just too easy. One single waterbender, born the same time as the tragic demise of the airbenders. Father didn’t want to draw unnecessary attention to his plans for the avatar, so I came up with a…stealthier plan. It was quite easy, really. Bribe the university to offer a new scholarship to those _disadvantaged_ children of the Southern Water Tribe,” Azula sends a look to Katara and Sokka, “and ensure one applicant in particular is accepted.”

Sokka doesn’t believe what he’s hearing. This is far bigger than he imagined, bigger than a spontaneous raid, bigger than a simple error mistaking Katara for the avatar, this is _big_. The Fire Lord has been manipulating their lives. Sokka feels his legs wavering underneath him and is bitterly thankful for the guard practically holding him up.

“Of course, it wasn’t difficult for me to get into the university. I suggested to get you involved, too. I knew you were in Ba Sing Se anyway, and I couldn’t have you getting in the way. Besides, I thought it was a good way to convince father you’d redeemed yourself and he’d allow you home. A small lie about father wanting you to go to university to prepare for your role as Fire Lord, and it was all laid out, just like that.”

“It was all…a lie?” Zuko asks, sounding as detached and shocked as Sokka.

“Oh, don’t look so shocked, you really think dear old dad would accept something as simple as that for you to come home?”

“But…why? Why university?”

“Why not? Have a little bit of fun with it. We needed to spy on them, see if she’s really the avatar. See, father had decided to _capture_ rather than kill, this time. Either get the avatar on his side or keep them off the playing field for the next 80 years. After I knew she was the avatar, Father thought it would be easiest to just capture her right then and there, but I thought the risk of doing it in the middle of the Earth Kingdom capital was too high. Besides, I wanted to have fun, didn’t I? What’s one more raid of the Southern Tribe? All it took was some rumours spread in front of the right people, then just like that the kids went running home to dad, sitting turtle ducks ready for us.”

“You…hasn’t the Fire Nation put these people through enough?”

“Clearly not.”

“But how? How were you sure she’s the avatar?”

“I watched her. I knew it wasn’t a coincidence she was always hanging around that airbender and earthbender. And then they were trying to get _you_ involved too, because of course she needs a firebending teacher. And I could just _tell_ you were getting feelings for the peasant boy.”

Zuko bristles, taking a step forward with his swords, but Azula just laughs.

“I was trying to protect you, Zuzu. You think the avatar’s brother won’t hesitate to use you and manipulate you to be a firebending teacher and get as much information about the Fire Nation out of you as possible? I was looking out for you, making sure you wouldn’t get hurt.”

“You didn’t _need_ to, Sokka wasn’t-”

“You don’t think he’s manipulating you, now, too?” Azula says, her voice rising to a near shout, “Look at this! You’re defending them, helping them escape, over your own _sister_! Going against your father’s wishes for a _boy_!”

“It’s the _right thing to do_!” Zuko yells back, but Sokka can see the hesitation in him, the doubt building up. Sokka panics. Azula can’t manipulate him, can’t convince him to re-join her. He can’t let that happen.

“Zuko-” he starts, but his mouth is quickly covered by the guard behind him.

“Let me guess,” Azula says, “he told you he _loves_ you, and he _forgives_ you for capturing him, if _only_ you’ll help him escape.”

Zuko takes a step back, turning to look at Sokka. He shakes his head fiercely with the little range of movement he has, desperately trying to shout through the hand blocking his mouth. Zuko’s eyes are wide, doubtful, _hurt_.

“Zuko,” Azula says, voice calm and controlled. She steps closer to him, “Your rightful place is on the throne. You don’t need to listen to those two, they’ll only get in your way. With the avatar, you can return home and-”

“She’s not the avatar,” Zuko says.

A brief flicker of surprise crosses Azula’s face, and then it’s gone, hidden back behind her mask. “And who told you that?”

Zuko opens his mouth, then closes it again. Sokka’s heart clenches in his chest. Zuko _can’t_ fall for her tricks. He and Katara share a look of panic. Sokka realises, with the hands over their mouths, neither of the guards have a very good grip on either of them. With a quick glance between Katara’s face and the hand holding her arms behind her back, Sokka gets his message across. Quickly, they both attack the guards, Sokka by throwing his head back and hitting the guard in the face, Katara by slamming her foot down onto the guard’s. They get free and disarm the guards in the span of a few seconds. When they stop, Zuko and Azula are simply watching them; Azula with a calm face, Zuko with a distressed, torn face.

“It’s time, I suppose,” Azula says, “make your decision, Zuzu.”

Zuko looks between Sokka and Azula. He grips his swords tighter and his mouth sets into a decisive line. “Father doesn’t control me anymore,” he says, drawing his swords back for a swing.

“Wrong choice,” Azula says simply. Sokka blinks and then there’s electricity filling the air, burning filling his nostrils and blue light blinding him. It’s like time moves in slow motion; he sees the jagged line of lightning shooting towards him, hears Zuko and Katara’s screams, but he’s frozen to the spot, unable to move. Before he’s even fully processed what’s going on, he’s thrown to the floor, his entire body seizing up. He can’t feel…anything. He feels the _pressure_ , like he’s just fallen off a cliff, but no pain beyond that. The images in front of him are fragmented, confusing. He sees the bright light filling the room, Katara screaming and moving towards something, and Zuko running straight into the path of the lightning. Sokka wants to scream at him, to tell him to stop, but he can’t move at all, can’t speak, can’t _warn_ Zuko.

Then, Sokka is released from Azula’s grip, the electricity pouring out of him. He sees a bright, bursting light and the air is filled with the salty ocean smell, and then he can’t even begin to think about what’s going on around him because all he can feel is wave after wave of unimaginable pain. He feels like he’s been cooked to the bone, his insides scrambled and his body a mess. Sokka can feel the freedom in his limbs but knows if he even tried to move them the pain would be unbearable. He can hear fighting, yelling, screaming. He can’t make out one single voice from another, he doesn’t know if Zuko or Katara are okay. He tries so desperately to stay conscious, vision drifting in and out, but it’s nearly impossible.

He _needs_ to know if they’re okay, if Zuko took the lightning, too. His muscles scream at it, but Sokka manages to lift himself up ever so slightly on one elbow, vision blackening for a moment as soon as his head is upright.

“Katara?” he says, his voice barely a croak, “Zuko?”

The two of them are fighting Azula, Zuko with fire and Katara with water she's pouring in through a hole in the wall. Zuko looks over at him, face written with worry. Sokka wants to reassure him that he’s fine, he’s okay, he’s still here, but when he opens his mouth none of it comes out. Zuko rushes over to him, and Sokka can no longer focus on the fight behind them as Zuko fills his vision.

“Sokka, are you alright?” he asks, hands running over Sokka’s skin but Sokka can hardly feel them, like they’re through layers and layers of clothes.

Sokka tries to nod, but he doesn’t know whether he manages it or not. He doesn’t remember when he laid back down, but he’s now looking at the ceiling, Zuko leaning over him.

“We need to get you out of here,” Zuko says, and then he’s disappearing again. Sokka tries so hard to reach out for him, but he’s gone.

Sokka’s vision goes black, and when it returns, he’s no longer on the floor, now instead in the air, held against something warm.

“Stay close to me,” a familiar voice is saying, “keep hold of him, tight. Don’t lose your balance, I’m going to try get us to land.”

Sokka can see the sky moving above him, changing from a metal ceiling to a starry night. He can feel a chest breathing heavily against his side, and shaking arms holding him tight. He hears water rushing around them, and then they’re moving, _fast_ , water rushing past them and splashing on Sokka. He groans, trying to complain that Katara’s waterbending _always_ gets him wet, but he barely manages a word.

“Sokka?” a different familiar voice says, deeper and raspier.

He tries to respond, but he’s not sure anything comes out because his vision is rapidly darkening at the edges again, and it’s soon eating him up entirely, taking all sights and sounds with it, nothing but the warmth against him keeping him rooted to the world.


	21. Chapter 21

Sokka is drifting, detached. Floating. He can feel the cool air against his skin but nothing more. If he really focuses, he can feel the chains binding him to reality; heavy, wrapping around his limbs and chest and weighing him down with a deep aching. But he tries not to feel it, tries to ignore the pain surging through his body in favour of the light emptiness surrounding him. He doesn’t know how long he spends like that, just drifting. It could be days, or mere minutes.

When he feels a tugging in his chest, pulling him back down to the ground, he resists. It’s a cool, soothing hand reaching out to him and pulling him down, but with it comes the pain of his body. It gets stronger the more Sokka resists, and he soon gives in, letting it pull him back down and into the pain filling every fibre of his being.

The cool sensation slowly spreads out from his chest into the rest of his body, soothing the aching but not quite getting rid of it. Sokka slowly feels more and more present, feeling the hard ground underneath him, the cold winds occasionally blowing past, and two people talking.

“Don’t- you’re in the way,” one snaps, “sorry,” they correct, voice calmer, “I’m just worried about him. Are you okay, do you need…?”

“I’m fine,” the other says, “I redirected it. Focus on Sokka, he took the brunt of it all.”

“I’ll take a look over you once Sokka’s awake.”

The cool reaches deeper and Sokka’s surroundings become clearer, louder, to the point where they’re overwhelming, almost deafening. The cool pierces deep into his chest, finding a bundle of energy knotted tight together and it sends a jolt through Sokka’s body. He sits up with a gasp, the brightness harsh against his eyes. It takes him a moment to process his surroundings; they’re in a cave, a fire burning close by. Katara and Zuko are knelt either side of him, Katara holding water to his chest and Zuko looking on anxiously. Through the water covering his chest, Sokka can make out an angry, red mark.

“Wha-” Sokka manages, his voice hoarse. Both sets of eyes shoot to his face and Sokka is met with a fierce one-armed hug from Katara before he can continue. “What happened?”

“Azula,” Zuko says, still keeping his distance, “she-”

 _Oh_. It all comes flooding back to Sokka. Trying to escape, fighting with Azula. Being _hit with lightning_. Beyond that, he doesn’t know what came next, but he supposes they escaped somewhere down the line.

“Zuko saved you,” Katara says, with a look of gratitude towards Zuko, “if he hadn’t intercepted the lightning, you-” she takes a deep breath, “I don’t know if you’d have made it. As it was, by the time we got to land, you were barely hanging on, I could _hardly_ feel you. We’re lucky I still had Yue’s spirit water.”

Sokka smiles through the aching pain. He knows how much influence the tides would’ve had on getting to land. “Yue’s looking out for me.”

Katara puts a hand on his forehead, feeling that and his cheeks for a fever. “She sure is.”

“Is he going to be okay?” Zuko asks, looking anxiously between Sokka and Katara. If Sokka could move, he’d be edging his way towards Zuko right now, wanting to wrap himself up in his heat.

“He’ll be okay, I think,” Katara says, putting the water back into her waterskin. Sokka can't look away from the mark in the centre of his chest, just below his ribs. _That_ will leave a scar. “I’ll have to keep doing some more healing, but I’ll let him rest for now.”

Zuko nods. For a moment, his hand reaches out and Sokka thinks he’s going to touch him, but he lets it drop to his side again. Katara closes his shirt and helps him sit up, pulling his coat back over him. It hardly does anything against the cold.

"Let me look at you," Katara says.

Zuko looks resistant, but unties his tunic, revealing a similar mark to Sokka's, lower on Zuko's belly. It's less angry, but it still makes Sokka shiver. Katara takes her water back out, bringing it to Zuko's stomach and holding it there, a light glow emanating from it.

“We should try get to the mainland as soon as Sokka’s got some more rest,” Katara says, “we don’t want to freeze out here.”

“We’re not on the mainland?” Sokka asks. He looks around a bit. The cave is cold, snow blowing hard outside. The sky outside is a deep blue, the sun low in the sky, which means they’re a lot further North than home. They’re a _long_ way from home, with nothing but the clothes on their back. They’ll freeze long before they make it back.

“We stopped on an island nearby,” Katara explains, “it’ll be a long way home.” Her face says what Sokka’s thinking; they might not make it. “You should be alright," she says to Zuko, putting her water away, "but I want to keep an eye on you. I’m going to go look for more firewood,” Katara says, “I won’t be long.” She gives Zuko a look that Sokka doesn’t understand, then ducks back out of the cave.

Zuko is silent for a long time, just watching Sokka, his hands occasionally twitching at his sides. “Are you okay?” he asks eventually.

“I’ve had worse,” Sokka lies, “it feels like someone’s dropped a rock on me.”

“I’m sorry,” Zuko says, reaching out again before stopping himself.

“Why are _you_ sorry?”

“I put you in this danger in the first place. I _knew_ Azula would-”

“Zuko, you saved me. That’s all that matters now, okay? I’m alive, right? Stop blaming yourself.”

“But-”

“Zuko.”

Zuko goes back to being silent, staring down at his knees. It kills Sokka; he wants to know what he’s thinking, can feel the tension radiating off of him.

“Zuko,” he starts, just as Zuko says, “Look-”

Sokka shuts up, watching Zuko and waiting for him to continue.

“Can I say something?” Zuko asks.

Sokka nods.

“I…” Zuko says, rubbing the back of his neck and hesitating, “Listen, I don’t care if you were just manipulating me to escape. I love you even if you don’t feel the same and it was the right thing to help you, I don’t regret it. So, I get it. You did what you had to do.” The words tumble out quickly, one on top of the other, and it takes Sokka a moment to actually process what he’s said.

“What?”

“What Azula said, about-”

“You think Azula was _right_?”

“I don’t…know?”

“Zuko…” Sokka pushes himself upright, as much as it hurts, he forces himself into a sitting position so he can look Zuko in the eye. “She was _lying_ , manipulating you, trying to turn you to her side. I wouldn’t…I wasn’t…”

“She was…lying?”

“All of that was _real_. Zuko, I- I never once lied to you.”

“You didn’t?”

“Of course not, I-” Sokka says, and then the words that Zuko actually said hit him like a train. “Wait, you love me?”

Zuko goes bright red, ducking his head. “I, uh…”

“You know I wasn’t lying before when I said I love you, right?”

Zuko looks up and meets Sokka’s eyes, “Right.”

“I mean it, Zuko,” Sokka says, shuffling closer to him even if it means pain shooting down his legs.

“Careful-”

“I just- I need to say-” Sokka says, giving himself a moment to collect his thoughts; his mind scattered from the pain and disorientation, “thank you, Zuko. For helping us escape, for saving me, for protecting Katara. I know it must’ve been hard going against your family like that, and I really appreciate it.”

Zuko smiles, so slight it’s barely even noticeable. “It was the right thing to do,” he says, bringing one hand up and finally, _finally_ , following through with it and resting it against Sokka’s cheek. The warmth spreads through Sokka’s face, making him shiver and realise how _cold_ he really is. “Are you okay?” Zuko asks, “Really?”

Sokka nods, “I’ll be fine.”

Zuko’s smile spreads wider, and he leans in, cradling Sokka’s face with the gentlest touch as he pulls him into a warm, soft kiss. He’s delicate with Sokka, like he’s afraid he’ll break, and, sure, Sokka’s head is throbbing from sitting up and all his muscles are screaming at him, but he pushes through it, melting into the kiss and Zuko’s warmth, basking in the light of his own personal sun. The tension leeches out of his body, the stress from the past few days disappearing with Zuko’s careful touches. He could stay like this for days.

“ _Ugh_ ,” Katara says from the mouth of the cave, a small bundle of wood in her arms, and Zuko quickly flinches away from Sokka, “gross. Please don’t start doing that in front of me.”

“Hey, you and Aang give me oogies all the time!”

“Me and Aang don’t- we’ve never- ugh!” Katara says, face going bright red as she stomps over to the fire, throwing herself down in front of it and adding wood to the pile.

They’re all silent for a painfully long moment, Zuko staring down at the ground, Katara huffing and throwing wood on the fire, Sokka looking between both of them and desperately thinking of something to say to ease the tension. It’s harder than it looks.

“You should lie down,” Katara says eventually, glancing at Sokka.

“Right,” Sokka says, remembering the aching deep in his bones, and shifts back away from Zuko, lowering himself to the ground. The moment he’s away from Zuko’s heat, he starts shivering, now really feeling the cold of the cave.

“Are you cold?” Katara asks, voice thick with worry, “You should move closer to the fire.”

Sokka hums an agreement, sitting up to shuffle closer. The warmth is nice, but it barely touches the cold already settled deep under his skin, just a flickering touch on the surface. Sokka starts shivering even more, the light heat making the cold worse in comparison.

Zuko stands up and moves to sit next to Sokka. He sits there, back perfectly straight, completely silent. After a moment, he clears his throat. “Do you, uh, I can warm you up, if you want?”

“Huh?” Sokka’s mind blanches. Is _that_ something appropriate to say in front of his sister?

“My uncle, he taught me this technique to control your body temperature. A firebending technique. So, I can never get cold, really.”

Katara laughs a little, “Well at least you’ll make it out of this.”

Sokka looks at Zuko, still shivering, “Please.”

“Lie down,” Zuko says, putting his legs out and making a space for Sokka to rest his head on his lap. Sokka lies down, his head comfortable and supported on Zuko’s thighs. Zuko closes his eyes, taking a deep breath in, then a slow breath out. Sokka looks up at him, watching the small tendrils of smoke blow out of Zuko’s nose and the small flames flicker out of his mouth with his breath out. Something deep stirs in his stomach that he will _not_ be confronting now, not with Katara sat barely a metre away.

Zuko drapes one arm across Sokka's chest, and he can immediately feel the burning heat soaking through his clothes to his skin. Zuko rests his other hand on Sokka’s forehead, his skin hotter than Sokka’s ever felt it. It’s right on the border of too much, but it starts to warm Sokka up quickly, the heat soaking throughout him.

“Okay, I’m never going through another winter without you,” Sokka says, with a content smile, “you’re incredible.”

Zuko blushes and it only makes Sokka smile wider.

“Katara, are you cold? Come steal some of Zuko’s heat.”

“Uh…” Katara hesitates but thinks better of it at the sight of the snow outside. She gets up, coming to sit on Zuko’s other side, at first keeping a slight distance between them. “Wow, you are warm,” she says, shuffling closer. “This is a good technique.”

“Yeah, remind me to tell Iroh thanks,” Sokka says.

Zuko laughs, a small chuckle.

It’s not long before all three of them drift off to sleep, Katara with her head on Zuko’s shoulder, Sokka with Zuko’s fingers running through his hair until Zuko drifts off, too. Sokka doesn’t wake up for a long time, and when he does it’s to Katara moving around, working on the fire, cooking something that smells _good_. Zuko still hasn’t moved, his warmth steady underneath Sokka, one hand resting over Sokka’s heart, the other running through his hair again. Sokka opens his eyes with a smile, finding himself immediately looking into Zuko’s. Zuko doesn’t look away, doesn’t even hesitate, just matches Sokka’s smile.

“Mmm,” Sokka says, tearing his eyes away to look at the three fish Katara has cooking over the fire, “that smells good.”

“I thought it’d be best for us to eat something,” Katara says, “then I’ll try another healing session and we’ll see if we can make it to the mainland.”

Sokka groans. The thought of food sounds good, and healing will probably make him feel better, too, but _travel_? Not so much.

“No complaints,” Katara says, “Zuko is a great heater but he can’t save us if a blizzard hits, which is looking more and more likely. We need to get home.”

Sokka sighs, but he knows she’s right. He drags himself into a seating position, hating being away from Zuko’s heat for the brief second between lifting off his lap and shuffling close to him, under his arm.

“Here,” Katara says, taking the fish off the fire and handing one to Sokka, one to Zuko. Zuko just stares at it for a moment, looking bewildered.

“No royal cutlery here, I’m afraid,” Sokka says with a laugh, immediately digging in. Zuko looks uncertain, but starts eating, a _lot_ slower than Sokka.

“Are you really not the avatar?” Zuko asks, between mouthfuls.

Katara looks surprised for a moment, then shakes her head, “Really not the avatar.”

“How do you know, though? If you’ve never had training, then…maybe you could be?”

“Well, because…” Katara looks at Sokka for confirmation before she continues, getting a nod in response, “we know who the avatar is.”

“What? Who?”

“It’s kind of, uh, Aang?” Sokka says.

“He means it’s definitely Aang,” Katara corrects.

“ _Aang_? Wow. This whole time and the avatar was just my project partner.”

Sokka laughs. “Your dad messed up big time, didn’t he?”

“I guess he did,” Zuko says, deep in contemplation, “growing up it was like he could never be wrong. And now…this.”

“Yeah,” Sokka agrees, “this.” He sighs, “We’re going to have to do something about this whole thing your dad is planning, aren’t we?”

Zuko looks…sad, more than anything else. “He needs to be stopped.”

“That’s sort of avatar business, isn’t it? Maintaining balance and all that?” Sokka asks.

“We won’t let Aang go into anything alone,” Katara says.

“Of course not,” Sokka says, “we’re with him all the way.”

“You guys would do that?” Zuko asks, “For your friend?”

“We’d do anything,” Katara says, “wouldn’t you?”

“I’ve never really…had friends, before you guys. I guess my sister's friends don't really count.”

“Well, welcome to the gang,” Sokka says, “team avatar, no one goes in alone.”

“That’s why Aang, Toph, and Suki were at the raid?”

Sokka nods, giving Zuko a gentle elbow, “That’s friendship.”

Zuko nods, a small smile on his face.

They all jump when there’s a deep roar outside, followed by a heavy thud and three smaller thuds.

“Oh, sweet land!” Sokka hears someone cry out, and he knows that voice.

Aang, Toph, and Suki run into the cave, their faces bright with smiles upon finding them.

“We found you!” Aang says.

“You guys escaped?” Toph says at the same time, making her way round to the fire and sticking her hands out to warm them up.

“Wait, Zuko?” Aang says, and both he and Suki don defensive stances, albeit confused ones, no doubt from the sight of Sokka practically hanging off of Zuko.

“It’s fine,” Katara says, standing up, “he helped us escape.”

“Nice,” Toph says, punching Zuko in the arm, “I knew you weren’t all bad.”

“Uh, thanks?”

“I’m so glad you guys are okay,” Aang says, pulling Katara into a big hug.

Suki comes over to hug Sokka, as best she can with Zuko there. “ _Are_ you okay?” she asks, “You look…not great.”

“Zuko’s sister kind of…shot lightning at me.”

“ _What_?” Aang says, as Toph says, “Awesome.”

“Zuko jumped in the way and redirected it,” Katara explains, “otherwise Sokka would be dead right now. He _almost_ was.”

Sokka shrugs, “What can I say, I’m a survivor.”

“ _Don’t_ jinx it,” Katara says with a glare, “you’ve still got a lot of healing to go. We should get home quickly, the sooner you can get properly warmed up with food and medicine, the better.”

“Yeah, okay, agreed,” Sokka says, the fish barely having touched his hunger.

“On Appa it’ll take a couple days,” Aang says.

“We best get moving, then,” Katara says, and they all start making their way outside to Appa.

Zuko and Sokka hang back for a moment.

“Can you walk okay?” Zuko asks.

“I can…try?” Sokka says, taking the arm Zuko is holding out for him and using it to stand up. Immediately, his vision darkens and he loses his balance. “Okay,” he says once his vision is back and he’s a bit more stable, now with Zuko’s arm round his waist, “I’m a bit woozy, but I’m sure I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?”

Sokka shrugs, “I can manage,” he says, but Zuko easily sees through his wincing, “really, I’ll be fine.”

They walk, slowly, up to Appa, Zuko giving Sokka a boost and Suki helping him pull himself up. Sokka watches Zuko follow, climbing up and settling in next to him.

“Get some rest,” he whispers, wrapping his arm back around Sokka and holding him tight. His voice is calm and assuring, but when Sokka looks up at him his face is written with worry. Sokka wants to reassure him, tell him he feels fine and everything will be okay now that they've got Appa to take them home, but the enticing pull of sleep is already drawing at his consciousness, and it’s not long before he’s drifting off in Zuko’s arms, the wind blowing gently past them.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we are rapidly approaching the end and boy am i going to miss writing this fic

Time passes strangely, moving in jumps and starts, then longer, drawn out stretches. In the stretches, Sokka feels almost conscious. He’s aware of his body, his pain, Katara’s healing. He can hear conversations around him, feel the burning presence of Zuko’s body, unwavering against him. Then he’ll be pulled away again, back into the darkness. Time will skip and jump, and the next time Sokka hears what’s going on around him he can _feel_ that time has passed, even if he hasn’t experienced it.

He doesn’t remember stopping or getting off Appa, just a brief recognition that he was being carried. Next thing he knows, he’s under the thin protection of what he can only assume is a tent, lying against Zuko’s legs. He wants to open his eyes, to talk to Zuko, to ease the tension he can so easily feel in Zuko’s rigid frame, but it’s difficult. The darkness around him is compelling, comfortable. He’s so tired and cold, it’s easy to just drift back into the lull of sleep without another thought.

“I’m worried about him,” Sokka hears Katara saying in one of his few more lucid moments. She sounds somewhat distant, but close enough to hear clearly.

“He just needs rest,” Aang answers, a similar distance away.

“It’s been over a day, this is more than just rest,” Katara says. He can hear her shuffling anxiously, kicking up snow. Maybe outside his tent? “He seemed _fine_ in the cave. He was awake, eating, talking. Now…maybe we shouldn’t have moved.”

“It was better that we try get him home quickly.”

“I know, you’re right,” Katara says. Sokka can feel Zuko’s long fingers running through his hair and it grounds him, keeping him aware. “But home is still days away. What if…I don’t know if my healing is enough.”

“Katara, you’re the best healer I’ve ever seen.”

“But I still don’t know that much! I’ve not had much practice beyond minor injuries in the tribe and stupid day-to-day injuries from Sokka. I can heal whatever physical damage there is, but what if there’s something else? He’s burning hot but shivers if Zuko leaves his side for even a second. I don’t know how to heal _that._ I need medicine for him, but…”

“We’ll make it back in time,” Aang insists, “he’ll be okay, Zuko’s always watching him and keeping him warm, and your healing seems to be working a bit on the physical damage. That’s all we can do for now, right?”

Katara sighs, “I guess so. I’m gonna see if I can do more healing.”

Sokka hears the rustle of tent fabric and someone stepping inside. Zuko’s fingers drift away from his hair, and he falls back into a dreamless sleep.

Zuko is the only constant through the drifting, hazy confusion of sleep. His constant heat, radiating through Sokka, keeps him grounded. Connected to the world. In all the chaos since the invasion, Sokka is still processing what’s happened between the two of them. As much as everyone else had been saying otherwise, Sokka never would’ve believed Zuko could return his feelings. Still can’t believe it, even after the surmounting evidence to the contrary, both explicitly from Zuko and through his actions. Plus, the fact that he hasn’t left Sokka’s side since they escaped Azula speaks for itself. 

Sokka still can’t believe his luck. The security of having Zuko there, making sure he’s safe, looked after, and warm is something Sokka has rarely experienced. He and Katara spent so much of their lives just looking after one another, it’s strange to have someone else there for him, too. Having everyone there, each of them only having come along to support Sokka and Katara, is strange. It’s scary, no longer just being the two of them against the world, not having to worry about anyone else, just watching out for each other. But it’s nice, too. Sokka never would’ve imagined he’d have a group of friends like this; people willing to put their lives and safety on the line for him and vice versa. It’s a happy thought that keeps him going through the pain, especially when he starts to get more and more conscious and aware of his surroundings, as well as the accompanying pain.

Sokka opens his eyes for the first time since the cave with a small groan and gets only a brief glimpse of the tent above him before he’s met with Zuko’s eyes looming over him.

“Sokka, are you okay? Can you hear me?” Zuko asks, voice filled with worry. As he leans over Sokka, one eye wide with concern, the other widened to its small limit, dark hair falling over his face, Sokka can only think one thing in his still half-asleep state.

“Mmm, you’re pretty,” he says, voice dumb with sleep and infatuation. He’d be embarrassed if he weren’t so unashamedly head over heels for Zuko.

Zuko goes bright red but doesn’t let it distract him. “Katara!” he calls out, not moving his eyes from Sokka’s face for a moment, “He’s awake!”

There’s one single peaceful moment, just Sokka and Zuko, where Sokka can pretend he’s not been shot full of lighting by Zuko’s crazy sister and they’re not running from imminent death-by-hypothermia, and he can just stare into Zuko’s eyes, enjoying the bliss he finds there. Then, the moment is disturbed by Katara running into the tent. Zuko’s eyes dart away, breaking the tie held between them. Two other heads poke into the tent, their faces a mirror of Katara’s concern. Sokka can only assume Toph is out there, too, checking up on him through the ground.

“Sokka, thank La,” Katara says, pulling him into a fierce, now two-armed, hug. As soon as she pulls away, she shoves him. Gently, but a shove nonetheless. “ _Never_ do that again, I was so _worried_ about you.”

“Never _sleep_ again? Katara, that’s a big ask.”

Katara hits his arm gently, “You know what I mean. You were asleep for _days_.”

“ _Days_?” Sokka asks, looking up at Zuko for confirmation. He nods solemnly. “Really?”

“Really,” Katara says, “we’re almost home. It’s maybe half a day’s travel, now. We’ll leave in the morning.”

“Wow, that was a nice easy journey for me,” Sokka jokes, his smile faltering with a glare from Katara.

“Are you okay?” Suki asks from the slit in the tent, “How do you feel?”

“Uh,” Sokka says intelligently, pushing himself a bit more upright. Zuko shifts behind him so Sokka can rest between his legs, using his chest as support. It’s even harder to come up with a response for Suki when he’s got the full length of Zuko’s body against his, heartbeat thrumming steadily against Sokka’s back, breath disturbing his untied hair. “Yes?” he eventually comes up with.

Katara gives him an impatient look, putting her palm to his forehead. Her hand is _freezing,_ and it sends a jolt through him, pushing him further back against Zuko.

“You’re burning up,” she says.

“I’m _freezing_ ,” Sokka insists.

“That’s what happens when you have a fever, Sokka,” Zuko says patiently, at the same time as Katara says, “Yeah, ever heard of a fever, dummy?”

Sokka pouts, “Don’t be mean to the injured guy.”

“I’ll do what I want,” Katara says, reaching for his shirt, “I’m the one healing you.”

“No, no, no,” Sokka says, swatting her hand away and wrapping his arms around himself. “I’m _cold_.”

“You’ve got Zuko,” she says with a roll of her eyes, “you need more healing.” She tries to reach for his shirt again, but he leans away from her, stretching to his limit. “I preferred this more when you were unconscious.”

Sokka pulls a face at her. “With everyone _watching_?” He asks, still holding tight onto his shirt. It’s not really like he cares, he’s not exactly a modest guy. But he is acutely aware of the fact that Zuko hasn’t left his side and Katara has been healing him frequently over the past few days, meaning that Zuko has been looking at a shirtless and unconscious Sokka for three days. Sokka would much rather have been able to show off his body to Zuko in just about any other scenario, but he supposes it’s too late for him now.

Suki and Aang duck back out with a look from Katara, and she manages to shove his hands away, pulling his tunic open. His chest is now wrapped in bandages that he never remembered having put on. Katara unwinds them slowly, revealing the wound underneath. Sokka expected it to look better, but it’s still just as angry, red, and irritated and just as painful as it looks.

“I better have a cool scar from this,” Sokka says, watching Katara pull the water out and settle it over the mark, “you better not heal it _too_ well. What’s the point if I don’t have a scar to show off?”

Katara makes a face at him, her eyes quickly darting up to Zuko, so fast Sokka barely catches it. His eyes go wide when he realises what the look _meant_. He halfway turns to Zuko and his words tumble out in a messy, panicked jumble.

“I didn’t mean- not like- a scar like- I didn’t-”

“Sokka,” Zuko says with a light chuckle, resting one hand on the exposed skin of Sokka’s bicep. It makes his stomach flutter. “It’s fine.”

“Right,” Sokka says, still wanting to kick himself for his stupidity, “right.”

The rest of the healing session with Katara passes in mostly awkward silence, at least Sokka deems it as such, just waiting for the moment when she’ll be done and leave and Sokka can talk to Zuko again. For the first time in _days_ , apparently.

“Keep an eye on him,” Katara says, a strict instruction, after Sokka’s bandaged up again and thankfully covered up.

“Yes, ma’am,” Zuko replies, both of them watching Katara disappear back outside.

“I didn’t mean to be weird, with the scar-” Sokka starts the moment the tent flap closes behind her.

“Sokka, it’s fine,” Zuko says with another laugh, but Sokka doesn’t want to accept that.

“I think scars are cool, really, they’re badass,” Sokka says, “I think _your_ scar is cool.”

“Sokka, you don’t need to say that. It’s fine. I’m…I’ve accepted it.”

“No, I mean it. Like, I wish you didn’t have it. Not that, like, no, I don’t wish you didn’t have it, I just- _ugh_ ,” Sokka groans, not knowing how to put his thoughts together. “I wish you’d never _got_ it, like, that that never happened to you, because that’s awful and your dad’s a jerk. But, like, I don’t wish you didn’t have it. Like, if Katara turned around and said she’d found a way to heal scars and she could heal yours, I wouldn’t want you to.”

“You wouldn’t?” Zuko asks, a small smile on his face, a mixture of amusement and bewilderment.

“Of course not,” Sokka says simply, his thoughts feeling somewhat clearer. He turns his body so his side is resting against Zuko’s chest instead, so he can look at him. “The scar is part of you. And, I guess, so is how you got it, so as much as I wish that you’d never had to go through that, I wouldn’t change it. This is…” Sokka reaches a hand up, resting his fingertips lightly against Zuko’s scar, “this is _you_.”

“You don’t think it’s…ugly?”

“ _Nothing_ about you could ever be ugly,” Sokka says, noticing the slight pinking of Zuko’s cheeks. “And it’s badass. You stood up against the _Fire Lord_ and have the scar to prove it. I think that’s pretty cool.”

“I think you’re delusional,” Zuko says, but he’s smiling.

“I think you’re gorgeous.”

The pink of his cheeks develops into a flaming red that Sokka wants to bask in forever. He’d spend his life making Zuko blush if he lets him. Sokka can’t resist, he tilts his face up, and Zuko luckily takes the hint, ducking his head down to meet Sokka’s lips.

“You need more rest,” Zuko mumbles against him when Sokka doesn’t let up.

“No,” Sokka says, pulling back and fixing his eyes on Zuko’s with a fierce determination that he hopes will convince him.

“I’m serious,” Zuko says, “you need to recover.”

Sokka groans, but he knows Zuko’s right, and he can already feel the tiredness trying to pull him back into sleep, even though he’s _surely_ gotten enough of it already.

“Lie down with me?” Sokka asks, instead of trying to protest.

Zuko smiles. “Fine,” he says, but judging by his face it’s hardly a sacrifice.

They shuffle round so they’re both lying down, facing one another, foreheads together and lips so _painfully_ close that Sokka doesn’t think he’ll ever sleep. He manages it, eventually, Zuko’s warmth and strong arm wrapped round him lulling him into a comfortable, easy sleep. He wakes up, once, in the night, with his head tucked into the crook of Zuko’s neck, his chest rising and falling a steady movement against Sokka’s own chest, light snoring above him. Sokka decides, as he drifts back to sleep, that if he spends every night like this for the rest of his life, then maybe he hasn’t done so bad.

The ride home on Appa is torture. Sokka is a lot more lucid than he’s been since they escaped, but with it has come waves of pain and dizziness and nausea that he’s desperately trying to push down and especially hide from Katara. He’s not about to pass out and have to be carried into the village. He’s excited to get home and see his dad and reassure him that they’re okay, they escaped fine. He’s a bit worried about his dad’s reaction to Zuko, but he can think about that later.

When they finally land, Sokka refuses to let himself suffer the embarrassment of being carried off of Appa while _conscious_ (finding out that they’d transferred him when he was asleep by Suki and Zuko passing him between themselves didn’t do much for his pride), so he struggles off the creature, very nearly landing in a heap on the ground in the process. Luckily, Zuko was already on the ground watching him carefully, and caught him quickly before he could stumble.

“I can walk, it’s fine,” Sokka insists. He knows his dad would be relieved and impressed to see them having escaped, and Sokka doesn’t exactly want to dull that with being half carried into the village.

“Sokka, it’s fine, I can help,” Zuko insists. He tries to wrap an arm round him, but Sokka pushes him off, determined to walk on his own. “Sokka-” Zuko calls out behind him, but he keeps going, following Katara towards their house, ready to see his dad.

Before they even get there, he’s coming out, looking around from the commotion outside at their arrival.

“Katara? Sokka?” he calls out, voice light with relief, running up to the two of them, pulling Katara into a hug as soon as he reaches her, giving Sokka time to catch up and join in. “How did you- what-” he starts, then his eyes dart away, going distant and his face clouding over with a frown, “ _Zuko_?”

“Dad, it’s fine,” Katara says, “he helped us escape. He’s okay.”

Hakoda keeps looking at Zuko, then his face clears, looking to Katara with a nod. Sokka guesses he didn’t need to worry, then. He makes a mental note to ask his dad about that, later, and check he’s _really_ okay with it.

“You don’t look so good, kid,” Hakoda says, putting a hand on Sokka’s shoulder. It takes all he has not to collapse under that slight disturbance, “what happened?”

“My sister happened,” Zuko says from behind him, making Sokka jump. He comes and stands next to Sokka, leaving an unbearable distance between the two of them. Sokka can feel himself swaying, desperately needing his support, but he persists. He can manage. He’s not collapsing in front of his dad.

“I’m fine,” Sokka insists, “it was nothing.”

“It wasn’t nothing,” Katara says, “I’ve been healing him, but he needs medicine.”

“Let’s get you inside,” Hakoda says, taking the lead back towards the house.

Sokka takes one step forwards and already feels close to collapsing, and clearly Zuko can tell it too, because he puts a hand out to support Sokka and help him keep his balance.

“I’m _fine_ ,” Sokka insists. He doesn’t need his dad to worry or think he couldn’t handle himself. If he’d been captured instead of Sokka, he would’ve managed just fine. He _certainly_ wouldn’t have gotten himself shot with lightning and then proceed to pass out for three days while everyone had to care for him. Sokka can manage himself just fine.

“Okay, whatever,” Zuko says, letting Sokka go ahead. Sokka follows his dad and sister, listening out for Zuko’s following footsteps, but they never come.

Sokka gets settled into his old bed quickly, happy to be back around familiar furs and the warmth that comes with being _indoors_. He tries not to think too much about Zuko’s missing warmth that he’d quickly grown accustomed to. Luckily, Katara gives him some miracle medicinal tea that wipes away almost all of his pain, leaving nothing behind, barely even a thought. Sokka quickly falls into an easy, painless sleep.

When he next wakes up, his dad is asleep, sat on the floor against the wall the other side of the room. Just outside, Sokka can hear Katara and Zuko talking in low voices, not loud enough for Sokka to make out any distinct words, no matter how hard he tries. His brain is still thick and slow with sleep and medicine, the pain slowly easing back into his body as it wears off.

“Katara,” he calls out, his voice a pathetic croak. His throat is bone dry and he’s really hoping he can have some more medicine at this point.

Katara pushes the curtain in the doorway aside, half stepping into the room. “Sokka? What’s up?”

Sokka glances at Hakoda, still fast asleep. He could easily ask Katara to get him water and medicine, but, really, he should do it himself. He’s not incapable. Just because he’s injured doesn’t make him helpless. He’d hate to see his dad wake up to him being waited on by Katara.

Ignoring the ever-increasing ache returning to his body, Sokka throws his legs over the side of the bed, making to get up.

“No, no, no,” Katara says, “you’re not going anywhere. You need to rest.”

Sokka groans, “I just want to get some water.”

“Then I’ll get some, don’t be such a martyr.”

Sokka glares at her. She glares back. They hold the contact for a moment, then Katara turns, leaving to get water. In the moment before the curtain swings shut again, Sokka catches a glimpse of Zuko watching him carefully, expression unreadable. It sends a shiver down his spine and he wishes Zuko was still staying close as his personal heater.

Katara comes back with more water and medicine, and this time there’s no sign of Zuko outside. When he falls back to sleep, Sokka dreams fitfully of Zuko being dragged away from him and desperately clinging onto his burning hand, trying to keep him close.

Sokka wakes up to voices talking over him, as he often seems to these days, and someone doing something to his chest, as also always seems to be happening. When he opens his eyes, Katara and Gran Gran are leaning over him, watching him carefully. Katara is washing the wound with a warm, wet rag, and Sokka can’t help but notice that it looks worse, swollen and red. He feels just as bad as the wound looks, clammy and cold, the surface of his skin burning hot. He can’t tell if his nausea is just from looking at the wound or not.

“Are you cleaning me up to eat me?” he asks, knowing the joke would land a lot better if he didn’t sound so weak when he said it, but still giving Kanna a smile that she rolls her eyes affectionately at.

“Maybe we should,” Katara says, not looking up from her work, “you’d be more useful to the village as food, I think.”

“Ha ha, you’re so funny, maybe you should try being the funny sibling,” Sokka retorts.

“What do you mean, try?” Katara asks, meeting his eyes with an annoying smile.

“Your sister is kidding,” Kanna says, easily dispersing the dispute between them, after years of practice, “you need more medicine.”

Sokka pulls a face. “I thought I was getting better,” he says, even though he doesn’t _feel_ better.

“You were getting _infected_ ,” Katara says, “we went too long without being able to properly clean or dress the wound, and-”

“But you were _healing_ me.”

“Healing isn’t _magic_.”

“Controlling water with your mind and healing people with it? Sounds like magic to me.”

Katara rolls her eyes, “I’m not a miracle worker. I had a limited supply of purified water; I did what I could.” Katara stops her movements, staring at the red mark, “I should’ve-”

“Katara,” Kanna says, voice soft but direct, “you did all you could, it’s not your fault.”

“I should’ve got him home sooner, he needed medicine, we shouldn’t have stopped overnight, we could’ve-”

“Katara, what’s done is done, all we can do now is focus on getting him better.”

“I’m still here, you know.”

Kanna gives him a _look_ , one he hasn’t seen for a good few years, not since he stopped throwing snowballs at the back of Katara’s head whenever she wasn’t looking. Okay, maybe not that many years. “Drink this,” she says, giving him a small, steaming cup of tea, then handing Katara a bowl of something foul-smelling.

Katara makes a similar face to Sokka as she dips her fingers into it. Sokka watches as time moves in slow motion, Katara’s fingers inching towards his chest and he really doesn’t want _that_ on him. Katara smears it over his chest, Sokka wincing away from it. The fatty, bitty mixture hardly looks like it’ll do _anything_ for the infection, but he knows better than to mistrust Kanna’s remedies; he’s never seen them fail. After Katara finishes covering his chest, they wrap him up again and give him strict instructions to sleep off the infection as soon as he’s finished his tea. He’s relieved to be left alone.

The tea goes down as well as expected for something filled with medicinal herbs and Kanna’s concoctions. Sokka tries to sleep, but it’s difficult. One minute, he’s shivering despite the pile of furs on top of him, the next he’s sweating through them all and wanting to strip down entirely. He manages sleep eventually, but it’s fitful, disrupted by his ever-changing temperature and the still raw and aching pain in his chest. He’s sure, between moments of sleep, he feels a warm hand wrapped around his, a presence watching over him, but by the time he drags himself out of his dreams, the room is empty.

The next time Sokka properly wakes up, the room is still empty, but with a suspicious fur laid on the floor next to his bed, like someone had been sat there. Sokka doesn’t want to think about it too hard, desperately missing Zuko’s presence and really not wanting to linger on _why_ he’s not been around. He’s thirsty, and hungry, and sore and wants to do something about at least one of them.

Sokka forces himself up and to his feet, taking a moment to steady himself through the waves of dizziness. He can do this. He puts one foot in front of the other, and it’s a lot harder than it looks, but he makes it out of the small bedroom and into the main room. He looks around but can’t see any water or food anywhere. _Great_ , he’s going to have to go outside.

On his way out, he catches a look at himself in the small mirror propped against the wall. He’s definitely looked better, his skin a sickly green, shining with sweat, framed with limp, dirty hair. No wonder Zuko isn’t hanging around him.

He braces himself for the cold outside, but it still hits him like a punch to the gut, sucking the air out of his lungs. He steadies himself on the wall, ignoring the ice freezing his hand in favour of staying upright as his vision dips and blurs. When it returns, Zuko is in front of him, face concerned. Sokka’s _missed_ his face.

“Sokka, what are you doing out here?” he asks, “You need to be resting.”

“I just need…some water, or food, or something,” he says.

“Let me get it for you,” Zuko says, but clearly sees the defiance in Sokka’s face, “or at _least_ let me help you. Please.”

Sokka wants to say yes, so bad, he wants to accept Zuko’s help and relax back into his support, but…just over Zuko’s shoulder, he can see his dad talking to someone. He hasn’t even noticed Sokka, but he doesn’t want him seeing him having to be practically carried around just to get _water_. Sokka isn’t weak; he’s a _warrior_. The other warriors have gone into _battle_ with worse.

Sokka shakes his head, and Zuko’s arms that are halfway reaching for him drop back to his sides. “I can do it,” he insists, “it’s fine.”

“Sokka…” he reaches a hesitant hand out that lightly touches Sokka’s arm, but Sokka pushes it off. He can do this by himself.

“I said I’m _fine_.” Sokka tries to prove it by taking a step forward, aiming for he doesn’t know where, but as soon as he starts to move, he’s hit with another wave of dizziness, and the next thing he knows he’s falling to the ground, his vision going black. Distantly, he notes that he never hits the cold, hard ground, only warmth and softness.


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is /technically/ the penultimate chapter bc chapter 25 will be an epilogue type thing

The last thing Sokka expects to see when he wakes up – except maybe Fire Lord Ozai himself – is Iroh, sat on the floor in his room making tea. He jumps, flinching to the other side of the bed and instantly running through worried thoughts about Zuko, without any logically connection to get him there.

“Ahh, I was hoping you’d wake up soon,” Iroh says, “I’ve made us tea.”

“Wha-” Sokka starts, but then Iroh’s holding out one of the cups of tea and he makes a reluctant face, peering into it warily. “Does it have medicine in?”

Iroh laughs, “No, just one of my own mixes.”

Sokka takes the cup, but raises his eyebrows, questioning.

“Rooibos and rose,” Iroh offers, “good for matters of the heart.”

Sokka takes a hesitant sip. It’s nice; the flavours mingling together in a way that is far too nuanced for Sokka’s inexperienced taste buds. As for the _heart_ comment, he doesn’t know what to think of that.

“What are you doing here?” Sokka asks.

“Zuko asked me to check in on you,” Iroh says, “well, not explicitly, but I could tell he was worrying.”

“Can’t he just check on me himself?”

Iroh looks at him as if contemplating something, then moves on without answering. “I suppose you mean why I’m in your village, though. Zuko left Ba Sing Se in a hurry after a visit from his sister. I’d assumed she’d taken him back to the Fire Nation and I worried he was being manipulated by his father, so I followed him there. I was wrong, unfortunately, but after a not-so-pleasant conversation with my brother I realised I wasn’t wrong about his manipulation. I came to the South Pole as quickly as I could, expecting to be far too late to stop Zuko from doing something he’d regret. You can imagine my delight when I found out he’d made the right choice.”

Sokka nods, drinking more of his tea, “I’d be dead without him.”

“Mm, I’m sure,” Iroh says, “then what is going on between the two of you? Surely, he’s done enough to earn your forgiveness?”

“What? What do you mean, going on? Nothing’s going on,” Sokka says. Sure, Zuko hasn’t even stepped inside to see him since they got home as far as he knows, but Sokka has _no_ idea what that’s about.

Iroh raises one eyebrow, “It didn’t seem that way from Zuko.”

“Why? What did he say?”

“Nothing,” Iroh says, simply. Infuriatingly. “But I know him well. Something is bothering him, and due to the fact that he’s hardly spoken of anything but you since I arrived, and hasn’t strayed far from your house all day, I’d say it’s you he’s thinking about.”

“I don’t know what,” Sokka says, “he’s hardly spoken to me since we got here. He hasn’t even come inside.”

“Maybe the issue might lie in there, somewhere,” Iroh says, finishing off his tea and taking Sokka’s finished cup from him. He stands up, packing up his tea things and heading to the door. He turns around halfway out, “Zuko has been through a lot, he’s a sensitive soul. Be careful with him.” And with that, he disappears, leaving Sokka alone again.

What did _any_ of that mean?

Zuko is…upset with him, annoyed at him, _something_ at him that means he isn’t visiting, but Sokka has no idea what. Can’t think of what could’ve happened, especially when he’s been unconscious nearly this entire time.

He needs to talk to Zuko.

He forces himself out of bed, hoping Iroh was right and Zuko _is_ just outside, because he only feels marginally stronger than when he last stood up, and he hardly wants it to go the same way as that did. He glances at himself quickly in the mirror on the way past, and winces. He doesn’t want to look like _this_ when he talks to Zuko. He grabs a leather band off the side and pulls his hair up and out of his face into a wolf tail, hoping it does at least something to improve his appearance.

Sokka hears footsteps while he’s fumbling with the band, and his heart leaps in his chest hoping it’s Zuko. Instead, his dad ducks into the room, a pile of freshly clean clothes in his arms.

“Sokka, what are you doing up?” he asks, putting down the clothes. Sokka gives up on tying his hair for the moment.

“Going to see Zuko.”

“Zuko can come see you, you should be resting,” Hakoda says, face stern.

“I’m _fine_ ,” Sokka insists, bunching his hair up again and trying to tie it, unsuccessfully, his coordination having gone downhill with the ever-present pain in his chest and weakness throughout his body.

“Here, let me,” Hakoda says, trying to take the band from him, but Sokka resists.

“No, it’s fine,” he says, “a warrior should be able to sufficiently prepare himself,” he adds, like reading words off a page, remembering training years ago.

“ _Sokka_. You’re injured. You don’t have to do everything by yourself.”

“I _can_ do everything, just fine,” he says, knowing his dad wouldn’t accept help either because warriors handle themselves. “Would you accept help?”

Hakoda sighs. “I’m just a stubborn old man. You shouldn’t be trying to copy me.”

“But you’ve _brave_ , you’re a _warrior_. You can manage on your own.”

“I can because I’ve had to. You and Katara have too, for a lot of your lives, I know. But you don’t anymore, you’ve got some great friends, and Zuko, too. Don’t think I haven’t noticed what’s going on between you two.”

Sokka ducks his head, trying to hide the blush crawling up his cheeks.

“There’s courage in asking for and accepting help,” Hakoda says, putting a hand on Sokka’s shoulder.

“You really think?”

“I know there is.”

Sokka turns, letting his dad pull him into a tight hug filled with relief. As much as he wants to be brave and a real warrior, he’s _tired_.

“So, I don’t want to see you stumbling around turning away everyone’s help, anymore, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Now, go see Zuko, I’ll turn a blind eye,” Hakoda says, pulling away and giving him a wink, “but I’m not helping you if Katara finds out you’re walking around.”

Sokka grins, turning to leave, but stops in his tracks. “Wait, could you…” he starts, holding out the band.

Hakoda smiles, taking it, “Of course.”

Sokka turns and waits patiently while Hakoda gathers his hair, easily tying it into a wolf tail, probably a far better one than Sokka could do on himself. Sokka remembers the days of his youth, before he knew how to tie up his hair himself, when it was still barely long enough to tie. Each morning, his mother would tie it up for him, after doing Katara's hair. The sudden wave of nostalgia and _grief_ surprises him, and the ache to fix things with Zuko only intensifies.

“Thank you,” Sokka says with a smile, then ducks outside, rushing in his excitement to talk to Zuko. Outside, he’s hit with another wave of dizziness, but he fights through it, forcing himself to stay upright. He needs to talk to Zuko, and he can’t pass out again before he finds him.

Next to their house, there’s a few tents set up that Sokka can only presume belong to his friends. The first is empty, the second made of rock, and the third- _Zuko_.

Zuko looks up when Sokka walks in, surprised but wary, watching in silence as Sokka sits down opposite him, a small distance between them.

“Sokka? Are you okay?”

“I’ve been better,” Sokka admits, “your uncle came and spoke to me.”

Zuko’s eyes widen. “He did?”

“He said…I don’t know. Have I done something? Annoyed you, or upset you or…anything?” Sokka asks, feeling like an idiot for not knowing what’s going on. Not knowing how Zuko’s _feeling_. He’s his… _something_ , he doesn’t know what, and he doesn’t even know why he’s upset.

Zuko is so quiet for so unbearably long that Sokka is about to start rambling, apologising for anything and everything. Luckily, before he gets the chance, Zuko speaks, his voice quiet, looking down at his hands. “Are you ashamed of me?”

“ _Ashamed_ of you?”

“I wouldn’t blame you if you were. I know I’m the prince and the history between our nations makes it complicated, so if you don’t want to be seen with me here, I get it. I know you don’t want your father to see us together, so I-”

“Zuko, what? I- what?”

“You-” Zuko frowns, looking up at him, “ever since we got here, you didn’t want me helping you or touching you. Especially when your dad was around. I just thought-”

“That I didn’t want to be seen with you,” Sokka finishes, feeling even _more_ like an idiot. How did he not _think_? The way he’d been acting, it’d be easy for Zuko to make that connection, but Sokka was too busy trying to look brave and strong that he was completely blind to it. “I’m an idiot.”

Zuko’s frown deepens, and he reaches a hesitant hand out towards Sokka, which only makes Sokka feel worse because of _course_ Zuko would still try to comfort him.

“I’ve been being…stupid,” Sokka says, unable to come up with a more sophisticated word for it, “I just wanted to impress my dad, really,” he admits, then realises what _that_ could mean, “not, like, by _not_ being with you, I just mean- I wanted to be independent.”

“Sokka, you-”

“My dad is so _strong_ ,” Sokka interrupts, wanting to get this out while he still has coherent thoughts, “he’s always been so strong, after my mum died, he kept going and kept leading the tribe. Katara, too, was always so strong, and I was just…there. I was never old enough to help defend the tribe, never as good at looking after everyone as Katara was. When word of the raid came, I thought this would finally be time to prove myself. But I was useless; I couldn’t defend Katara or the tribe and I got captured. I thought at _least_ I could prove that I could escape fine and manage without everyone having to do everything for me.” Sokka stops, taking a breath and trying to ignore the new wave of dizziness. “It was never you,” he continues, taking Zuko’s hands, “I could never be… _ashamed_ of you. I’m _proud_. I wanna show you off to everyone, show everyone how lucky I am that I’m your…your…whatever I am. I’m sorry I made you think that I was.”

“It’s okay,” Zuko says, shaking his head, the relief evident in his face. A small smile slowly creeps across his face, somewhat guilty. “I’ve done worse to you to try and earn my father’s approval.”

With that simple sentence, everything falls together, because of course Sokka _knew_ the Fire Lord is Zuko’s father, obviously, but he’s never entirely thought of it in the same way that Hakoda is his own father, that Zuko gets that same desperate need to please him, to impress him. Jerk Fire Lord or not, he’s still Zuko’s father. Sokka can’t even begin to imagine how hard that would’ve been; he’s always been searching for his father’s approval and frequently gotten it, he can’t imagine never getting anything but rejection and a _scar_ from his father for his efforts.

Sokka pulls Zuko’s hands, yanking him forward quickly so he can pull him into a hug, holding onto him tightly. Zuko takes a moment to react, limp in his arms for a second, before he brings his arms up and hugs Sokka back just as tightly.

“I’m really sorry, though, I mean it,” Sokka says into his shoulder.

Sokka can feel Zuko’s smile against his neck. “I think I can forgive you.”

Sokka pulls back so he can look at Zuko; he’s missed his face too much. “Lucky me,” he says, bringing him into a slow, gentle kiss that makes everything okay again.

Over the next few days, Sokka refuses to let Zuko leave his side unless it’s to get him food or water or, reluctantly, to tell Katara he needs more medicine. The infection slowly gets better, but Sokka is still unfortunately forcibly bed ridden until Katara deems him well enough to start walking around again. Luckily, Zuko is good company, and Sokka rarely gets bored with him there. Sokka will ask him incessant questions, wanting to know absolutely everything about his life. As painful as some of it is to listen to, he wants to know it all. He learns all about Zuko’s mother and what happened to her, his life in the palace, his banishment, everything. Similarly, Zuko asks for just as many details about Sokka’s life; learning to hunt and training as a warrior with his father, the few memories he has of his mother, his time in the Northern Tribe and more about Yue, everything.

In the day, with everyone coming in and out of the room, Zuko sits a polite distance away, on the floor. But at night, he joins Sokka in the bed, small enough that there is little space for distance between them. Not that Sokka could ever complain about that, and he sleeps the best he has in a long time; enjoying Zuko's heat and the steady rhythm of his breathing to easily lull him to sleep.

When Sokka is back on his feet again, he’s happy to enjoy Zuko’s help with things, not letting himself get concerned about his pride and independence. So, when his dad returns from a hunting trip after a few days away, Sokka is happy to let Zuko help him walk up to greet him.

Hakoda gives him a big, warm hug, stinking of the hunt and _badly_ needing a wash. But, also comforting, reminding Sokka of the routine of being at home, greatly improved with Zuko at his side.

“I’m glad to see you on your feet,” Hakoda says, “as long as this is approved.”

Sokka laughs, “Katara is letting me out for short periods of time.”

Hakoda laughs, too, “Good to see it.”

“So, uh, could I-” Sokka hesitates. He’s been thinking over this for a few days, wanting to do it for Zuko, but also for him, “I wasn’t exactly in the best state when we arrived, and I know you met each other before, but could I re-introduce you two?”

They both look confused, but not resistant, and Sokka supposes that’s all he can ask for.

“Go ahead,” Hakoda says, with a confused smile.

“So, Zuko, this is my dad. The chief,” Sokka says, watching the two of them exchange a nod, “and dad, this is Zuko, the _not_ evil prince of the Fire Nation, and my boyfriend.”

Sokka sends a look Zuko’s way to check his reaction, that he hasn’t hideously overstepped and misjudged this, but he’s met with a smile that he will never stop trying to make happen, hopefully for the rest of his life.


	24. Chapter 24

Recovery is a difficult, slow process. Sokka is grateful for his sister’s magical healing powers, which he’s sure greatly speed up the process, especially once he’s past the peak of the infection.

“Hey,” Katara says, ducking her head into the room, and Sokka is _really_ a man of routine because the moment he sees her, his stomach starts rumbling, knowing this is around the time someone brings him dinner. He’s disappointed by her empty hands. “Do you want to come out for dinner?”

“Really?” Sokka asks, automatically looking to Zuko for a second verification, where he’s sat on the bed next to him, playing with the edge of Sokka’s shirt.

“You haven’t been as dizzy, right?” Katara asks, continuing after Sokka’s answering nod, “I think it’s probably time to start getting your strength up again.”

“Sounds good to me,” Sokka says, excited to get back to normal, and missing getting to sit out by the fire with everyone over mealtimes. Underneath it, he mourns the end of his and Zuko’s never-ending moments together, eating meals sat together on Sokka’s bed, and the rest of the days forever in one another’s company. Even further underneath that, he has a bitter seed of worry about what things will be like back in Ba Sing Se; after this time together, to go back to living apart, a significant walk away, Sokka doesn’t know if he’ll be able to cope.

“Do you need help?” Zuko asks, watching Sokka pull himself out of bed.

“I think I’m alright,” Sokka says, adding a smile on the end, an unspoken reassurance that it’s genuine; he’s getting better.

Zuko accepts it, standing up with him, and instead of wrapping a supportive arm around him as he’s had to many times, he takes Sokka’s hand, intertwining their fingers. Sokka’s heart beats heavy in his chest.

Outside, everyone is already gathered round the fire, bowls of food in hand, laughing and happy. The atmosphere is warm, comfortable. A family Sokka never expected he’d get. He and Zuko sit down in the space between Toph and Suki, while Katara sits the other side of the fire, next to Aang. Sokka notices how close she sits to him.

“You’ve gotten off easily,” Toph mutters to him, “they’ve been obsessed with one another, even more than usual.”

“Ugh,” Sokka groans, “I hate to think what they’ll be like when they actually suck it up and get together.”

“Oh, it’s definitely on the horizon. Just you wait.”

“Before we leave the South Pole?”

Toph hums, thinking for a moment. “No, I’m saying practically the day we get back to Ba Sing Se.”

“No way, look at them! Or, uh, you know. There’s no way they’re lasting that long.”

“You wanna bet on that?”

“You’re on,” Sokka says, shaking her hand with a grin.

Toph grins back, stretching her legs out in front of her with an obnoxious groan. “So, when are we getting away from all this ice?” she asks the group loudly, “I’ve had enough of choosing between frozen feet or being as blind as the rest of you.”

Katara and Aang’s faces both drop from the dopey smiles they’d been sharing. “We need to talk about that,” Katara says, “now that Sokka’s getting better.”

“What?” Sokka asks, “What’s there to discuss?”

“My father,” Zuko says, voice serious. Katara nods gravely.

“Oh.” Sokka had almost forgotten, in his bliss with Zuko.

“I don’t know what his timeline is, but he needs to be stopped before he tries to start his plan,” Zuko says.

All of them turn to Aang, who meets the attention with a panicked look. Sokka can’t really blame him; he can barely handle the regular pressures of his own life, he can’t even begin to imagine the pressures of being the _avatar_ , let alone if you only just found out a couple months ago.

Aang groans. “This is what my past lives have been trying to warn me about, isn’t it?”

A grave nod travels round the circle. It would look hilarious if they all weren’t so scared.

“I barely know water and earthbending, and I haven’t even _started_ firebending training. How am I supposed to defeat the _Fire Lord_?” Aang asks, voice filled with stress. Sokka feels for him, the weight of the world on his shoulders. He looks around their group, a group of fairly capable people, really. Sure, the avatar is the bridge between worlds and supposed to maintain balance across them, but who says he can’t have a little help? That’s what friends are for, really, isn’t it? What _family_ is for.

“Who says you need to know them all?” Sokka asks, “Between us, we’ve got _more_ than a whole avatar. A master airbender, waterbender, earthbender, and firebender, _plus_ two expert warriors,” he says, with a grin at Suki, “what more could we need?”

Aang still looks doubtful, but Sokka can see the resolve settling in Katara’s eyes. “We can do this,” she says, “we’re by your side, all the way.”

Toph smacks her fist into her palm, grinning through her fringe, “I’d love to kick the Fire Lord’s butt.”

Suki nods, “He has it coming. We’re with you, Aang.”

Eyes, hesitant and wary, turn to Zuko. Not accusatory, but careful. They’re still all acutely aware that this is Zuko’s _father_ they’re discussing.

“He needs to be stopped,” Zuko agrees, “I’m with you. Whatever I can do to stop him. I’ve spent too much of my life helping him.”

Aang smiles, “You guys really think we could do this?”

Toph shrugs. “Why not? He’s only one guy.”

“He’s powerful,” Zuko interjects. It’s subtle, easily missed, but Sokka can hear the fear in his voice. He squeezes Zuko’s hand tight.

“So am I,” Toph responds. Sokka wants to laugh; her confidence, ridiculous but entirely earned, is exactly what they all need to hear. Who’s the Fire Lord against one of the most powerful earthbenders of all time?

“I don’t want you guys getting hurt,” Aang says, “this would be dangerous.”

“Aang,” Katara says, putting a hand on his arm, “we’re family, we’re not letting you do this alone.”

There are murmurs of agreement round the circle, and Aang’s hesitation slowly dissolves into agreement. Sokka is terrified, of course he is, at the prospect of facing the Fire Lord, but he couldn’t hope for better people to do it with.

“It’s not really like we can just march into the palace and beat up the Fire Lord, though,” Aang says.

“Why not?” Zuko asks. Sokka turns to him and can see Suki on his other side making a similar bewildered face to his own. “I mean it,” Zuko continues, “I know the palace like the back of my hand. A small group like this, I could get us in easily. Get a few guards out of the way, and it won’t be hard to find my father.”

“You really think it could be that easy?” Sokka ask.

Zuko shrugs. “I don’t see why not. He’s arrogant. He won’t expect an invasion, especially not a bunch of teenagers.”

“Wow,” Suki says, pretty much airing all their thoughts, “we could really do this. Are we sure, he’s, y’know, completely evil? I don’t want to start a war for nothing.”

Zuko’s expression is grave, a bitterness setting deep into his face. “I don’t know his plans from him directly, but Azula is doing all his dirty work at the moment. She says he wants to rule over all the nations, no matter the method.”

“That doesn’t sound good,” Aang says.

“Okay, so, yeah, completely evil,” Suki says.

Zuko nods. Sokka doesn’t miss the way his free hand goes to the scarring on his arm.

“We’ll make a plan,” Sokka says, not liking the heavy tension reacquainting itself with the group, “we’ll sort this out. My dad can help, Iroh can help. We’ll be fine.”

Sokka looks around the group, and he’s met with a mixture of doubt, hope, and fear. He feels all three swirling around inside him, but the heat of Zuko’s hand against his keeps him grounded, keeps him determined. The feeling of the scarring on the back of Zuko’s hand under Sokka’s fingertips keeps him angry. The Fire Lord doesn’t get to hurt anyone else, and definitely not Zuko more than he already has. Sokka will make sure of that if nothing else.

Turns out, trying to plan an invasion is difficult. Iroh, knowing everything that he does, told them about a solar eclipse in the coming months that will mean firebending is impossible for a few minutes. It’s a difficult choice; the palace will be on high alert during the eclipse, but it will mean an easier fight when it comes down to it. Sokka, selfishly, is torn between being in favour of invading on the eclipse or not, because on one hand, it means Ozai can’t hurt Zuko with his firebending again, but on the other hand, it means Zuko could be significantly more defenceless than he’s used to. In the end, they all favour the eclipse. There’s a hidden bunker underneath the palace that both Iroh and Zuko know the innerworkings of, which is no doubt where Ozai will be hiding for the duration of the eclipse. They could still have their stealth advantage, and even without, the advantage of Ozai not having his firebending greatly outweighs the disadvantage of Aang and Zuko not having theirs.

It means deferring their studies for a year; none of them will be able to focus on university work while trying to train to _invade the Fire Nation_. Aang, especially, wants to spend the months leading to the invasion training in water, earth, and firebending to the best of his ability so he’s as prepared as possible. Sokka, too, feels just as hopelessly unprepared for this and knows he needs far more training.

“Hey,” Zuko says from the doorway, watching Sokka trying to pack his things together, “how are you feeling?”

Sokka sighs, stopping his movements. He’s never been good at packing, especially not for this. “Scared.”

“Me too,” Zuko says, coming over and sitting next to Sokka on the floor, “but I meant your chest.”

Sokka shrugs, “As good as it’s ever been.”

“How’s packing going?”

“Bad. You’re lucky you don’t have anything to pack,” Sokka says, sighing and slumping against Zuko. “I don’t want to leave.”

“I know,” Zuko says, rubbing his arm soothingly. They’d all agreed that as much as they’d want to stay in the South Pole – especially Sokka and Katara – they can’t risk it. Zuko knows the only reason Azula hasn’t turned straight around to re-capture them is because she needs to tell their father of his treachery, and they need to figure out whether Zuko was telling the truth when he said Katara isn’t the avatar. Either way, they’ll come for them one way or another, whether it’s Katara or Aang, once they figure it out. They can’t go back to Ba Sing Se, either, because they’ll just be sitting ducks for Azula there, too. So, they settled on going back to the Earth Kingdom and living as nomads until the invasion. If they stay in one place too long, they risk attention from Azula, and as little as Sokka wants to be living out of a tent for months, he’d much rather that than being captured as enemies of the Fire Nation.

“Are _you_ ready for this?” Sokka asks, knowing however hard this is for him, it’s a million times harder for Zuko.

“No,” Zuko says simply, “but I’ll manage.”

“If you need…anything,” Sokka says, “I’m here.”

“I know,” Zuko says, with a soft smile that melts Sokka’s worries. “Hurry up, the feast isn’t long.”

“Mmm, feast,” Sokka says, already drifting off into a daydream about all the food he can eat while he packs the rest of his stuff together. Hakoda had asked them to stay for at least the first day of the Glacier Spirits Festival, and Sokka really didn’t take much convincing. The first day is the best day, purely because of the feast. As a kid, he always looked forward to being Chief because it meant the feast was in honour of him – so he could eat _all_ he wants – and he still does, if he’s honest.

Sokka’s excited to share the day with Zuko; being able to share his home with him has been great, and sharing more of his culture, one of his favourite holidays, will be even better.

“You know,” Sokka says, as he shoves clothes haphazardly into his bag, getting a thought that he _very_ much wants to run with, “this is a sacred Water Tribe festival, it’s tradition to wear _Water Tribe_ clothes.”

Zuko stiffens next to him, “Is it?”

Sokka turns, the excitement pushing past the surface and the idea solidifying in his mind, “You’d look _so good_ in blue.”

“Sokka, I don’t know-”

“Come on, you can borrow something.”

Zuko’s eyes are pleading, and Sokka is about to relent, accept that _fine_ , he can wear his own clothes, even though they’re hardly _suitable_ for the event, but something in Sokka’s expression makes Zuko falter, and his expression softens.

“ _Fine_ ,” he agrees, and Sokka beams. “I’m gonna regret this, aren’t I?”

Sokka shakes his head, forcefully. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Come on,” he says, standing up and dragging Zuko with him by his arm.

Not long later, Zuko and Sokka are both dress head-to-toe in traditional Water Tribe clothes (Sokka with the help of Zuko, after still struggling with his bandages, which just about killed him, Zuko’s light touch across his chest as he pulled his shirt on), more on the formal side because, after all, Sokka is the son of the Chief.

“You look amazing,” Sokka says, holding Zuko at arm’s length to admire him, “I mean, you always do. Red is _very_ much your colour. But blue…also good. Let’s be honest, you could pull anything off.”

Zuko’s cheeks flush, but Sokka’s glad to see he doesn’t duck or try to hide it, just keeps his eyes focused on Sokka. “You always look good in blue,” Zuko says, and Sokka feels his heart swell at the _normalcy_ of this all. Their first kiss being while Sokka was imprisoned and them figuring out the start of their relationship in the midst of Sokka fighting off a life-threatening injury and infection, and planning an attack on the Fire Lord, hasn’t exactly been normal. So, this, getting dressed up together for a festival and feast, spending time with Sokka’s family and their friends, it feels so _normal_. Sokka can’t get enough of it, taking in this moment, etching it into his memory so he can hold onto it over the undoubtable chaos of the next few months as something to look forward to when it’s all over.

Sokka wishes he could stay in this moment forever, but he’s sure he’ll feel the same way about the rest of the evening, so they should probably get out to the others before they miss the feast. To add a little more to his memory, Sokka pulls Zuko in close – delighting at the surprised widening of Zuko’s eyes – and kisses him, fierce and meaningful, like they’re about to be ripped apart for good. Sokka doesn’t know what will happen over the next few months, or during the invasion, and he’s not going to waste any of the time he has.

“We’re only going outside, it’s not far,” Zuko says with a breathy laugh when they pull away, but still keeping close, close enough that Zuko’s eyes are nothing more than a blur of white and gold, but still unmistakeably _Zuko_.

“Mmm,” Sokka hums, giving him another, shorter, kiss, “but it’s not like I can do this over dinner.”

“We’ll be late,” Zuko scolds, “they’ll start without us.”

“I’m the Chief’s son, they can wait.”

Zuko smiles, Sokka can see the movement of it around his eyes and it’s hypnotic. “But can _you_ wait? It’s a feast, after all.”

Sokka sighs, noting the hunger settled in his stomach. Reluctantly, he pulls away from Zuko, keeping one hand intertwined. “You know me too well.”

They walk together outside, and Sokka is, as always, amazed by the beauty of the festival. It’s small, nothing compared to how it used to be when the tribe was big, as Gran Gran tells it, but it’s still beautiful. Around the village, lanterns hang off of and between houses, criss-crossing and lighting up the sky. Above them, the sky is a blend of oranges, pinks, and reds, an eternal sunset that will probably last all night. On the ground, in the open space between the houses, there’s stalls, a space cleared for dancing, and tables set up for the feast, one long table at the front for the Chief and his family. There used to be five seats, then four after their mother died. Today, there’s eight and Sokka’s heart swells. Everyone’s already in place, the rest of the tables filled. On the Chief’s table, Hakoda is sat in the centre with Gran Gran, Katara on their right, then Aang, then Toph. To the left, there’s two empty seats, then Suki.

“Come on,” Sokka says with a grin, pulling Zuko along behind him and taking the seat on Hakoda’s left, Zuko sitting in the empty seat on Sokka’s left.

He tries, _hard_ , to listen when his dad starts speaking, giving a speech about the coming year, blah blah blah. But it’s difficult. He’s heard these speeches over a dozen times and they’ve never gotten any more interesting. Sokka makes a mental note to find a way to make things interesting when _he’s_ Chief. Or just sack the speech entirely, maybe.

Sokka looks over to whisper something to Zuko, but his attention is focused, looking over Sokka’s head at Hakoda, actually concentrating. Sokka feels warmth build in his chest. Zuko is here, by his side, wearing the clothes he forced him into, trying hard and paying attention to the rubbish his dad is spouting. Even Katara stopped paying attention years ago, and she pays attention to _everything_. Sokka wants to kiss him, right there, in front of everyone. He won’t, but he likes knowing he could. His eyes rake over Zuko’s face, the face he’s memorised from hours of staring and admiration. His eyes wide, looking up at Hakoda, a small crease of concentration next to his eyebrow, and his lips ever-so-slightly parted and, La, if that isn’t tempting.

Zuko’s eyes flick down to meet Sokka’s, then back up to Hakoda, then back down again.

“What?” he whispers, a small frown deepening the crease.

“Nothing,” Sokka whispers back with a dumb smile. Zuko looks back up at Hakoda.

“Stop staring at me,” Zuko says, not looking at Sokka this time.

“I can’t help it,” Sokka says, “you look good.”

Zuko blushes, tries for a moment to keep his focus on Hakoda, gives up and looks at Sokka with a small pout that just about _kills_ him, then lowers his eyes to the table.

Sokka shuffles his chair closer to Zuko’s so he can whisper to him better. At least, that’s what he wants to pretend it is. In reality, the chairs are spaced too far apart for Sokka’s liking, and he’s drawn to Zuko’s heat like a moth to a flame, unable to stay away from him for even a moment. “I mean it,” he whispers, close to Zuko’s ear, “you’re distracting.”

“ _You’re_ distracting,” Zuko says, turning very suddenly to face Sokka, so they end up practically nose-to-nose. Sokka thought _before_ it was hard not to kiss Zuko, now…

The room erupts in applause, everyone standing for the end of Hakoda’s speech. Automatically, Sokka and Zuko both stand and start clapping, too. Zuko’s attention shifts, looking round Sokka to Hakoda and the rest of the room, but Sokka doesn’t look away from him for even a single moment.

The meal passes in a blur of endless plates of food and Sokka’s unstoppable need to consume as much as humanly possible. Which ends as he should’ve expected, with an uncomfortably full stomach and deep regret.

“You do this every year, come on, you _must’ve_ learnt by now,” Katara says, in between laughter at Sokka’s groaning from one of the now-empty tables, everyone having cleared out to wander round the few stalls and games.

“It’s a _feast_ , you’re supposed to _feast_ ,” Sokka says, hands clutching his stomach, “I wish I had a bigger stomach.”

“You have a massive stomach.”

Sokka sticks his tongue out at her, but only gets the same in return.

“Feeling any better?” Zuko asks, reappearing with Toph after the two of them had left to see how much Toph could win by cheating the system. Sokka _had_ wanted to join, but definitely needed more time to digest.

“Ugh,” is all he gives in response, shuffling over on the bench so Zuko can settle in next to him, Toph sitting round the other side with Katara.

“Don’t worry about him,” Katara tells Zuko, “he’s like this every year. He’s just a drama queen. He’ll get over it when the music starts, and he decides he wants to dance.”

As if on cue, the band starts up, music filling the air around them. Katara gives him a knowing look, but Sokka stays put, snaking an arm round Zuko’s waist, and resting his cheek against his shoulder. Katara rolls her eyes.

“Hey, Katara,” Aang says, approaching the table with more nerves than Sokka’s ever seen him. “Would you like to dance?”

“Uh,” Katara looks hesitant, glancing round at the others, then back at Aang. “Yeah, okay. Sure,” she says, smiling and taking Aang’s hand. He leads her to the empty space where some people had started to dance.

“Toph,” Sokka leans across the table, “be ready to pay up.”

“Huh?” Zuko frowns, looking between the two of them.

“It’s _not_ happening. Look at them,” Toph says, pointing without looking, “they’re not even touching.”

“Oh, it’ll happen,” Sokka says, turning to Zuko, “Toph bet they wouldn’t get together until we leave the South Pole. I said they would.”

“What?” Zuko looks even more confused, “Aang and Katara?”

“Oh yeah, they’ve been on the verge of this for _months_ ,” Sokka says.

“Are you really that oblivious, fire boy?”

Zuko shrugs, looking thoughtful. “I guess I never noticed.”

The upbeat song shifts to a slower one and Sokka practically jumps out of his seat. “This is _it_ , look,” Sokka points, uselessly, at Aang and Katara shifting awkwardly closer, wrapping arms around one another. “It’ll happen.”

Toph blows some air out of her mouth, sending her bangs flying up. “No way, not yet.”

“We’ll see,” Sokka says, a smile on his face. He watches Katara and Aang for a moment, gradually getting more comfortable with one another, and then _realises_. Each year, he and Katara would dance messily to the more upbeat songs, do some traditional dances when the song called for it, then take breathers when it came to slower songs. Sokka remembers watching the couples in those moments, daydreaming about the day he’d take someone out onto the dance floor to slow dance with him. And _now_ …Zuko.

Sokka grabs Zuko’s arm, making him jump. “Let’s go dance,” he says, getting up and starting to drag Zuko off the table.

“Wait, wait, wait,” Zuko says resisting, “I don’t know.”

“Why _not_?”

“I don’t really, uh, I’m not much of a dancer.”

“Oh, come on, I’m sure you’re great. You’re a prince, you must’ve had proper dance training.”

“No, I mean it,” Zuko insists, “dancing isn’t very big in the Fire Nation. Not under my father’s rule, at least. I’ve never really done it.”

“Ever?” Toph asks, “Wow, even _my_ parents let me dance. As long as I was ‘ _careful’_. It wasn’t fun dancing, in retrospect.”

“Come on, Zuko, I can show you how,” Sokka says, still trying to pull him, “it’s not hard, I promise.”

“I don’t know…”

“Pleeeease,” Sokka begs, considering whether getting down on his knees is too dramatic.

Zuko sighs, relenting and letting Sokka drag him off the bench. “Fine,” he says, “but you can’t laugh at me if I screw it up.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Sokka says with a big smile, pulling him over to the dance floor. “So, one hand here,” he says, putting Zuko’s hand on his shoulder, then his own on Zuko’s lower back, “and keep these hands together,” he says, nodding to their already clasped hands. “Just follow my steps,” he finishes, pulling Zuko closer and starting slow, careful movements round the dance floor. Zuko, other than the occasional mistake or stumble, does well.

“They really don’t dance in the Fire Nation?” Sokka asks.

Zuko shakes his head. “They really don’t.”

“I think that’s number one priority, then, once Aang’s, uh… _dealt with_ your father,” Sokka says, realising a bit too late that talking about the impending invasion and attack on Zuko’s father is probably not the most romantic subject in the world.

“Mmm,” Zuko hums in agreement, still glancing down at his feet occasionally to keep his step.

“Not even at, like, _weddings_ , they still don’t dance?”

“Maybe once upon a time,” Zuko says, “but not anymore.”

“That’s horrible,” Sokka says, and he can’t help it; he pictures a wedding between him and Zuko, a strange mingling of Water Tribe tradition and what he knows of Fire Nation culture. He imagines them dancing, like this, newly wed. Sokka’s heart flutters at the thought of it, and he pulls Zuko in closer, resting his chin on Zuko’s shoulder, Zuko doing the same with him, relaxing into his frame.

Sokka can feel Zuko’s steady breaths against his neck, can hear the music filling the air around him over the top of the distant talking and laughter of the festival. He decides this is another moment he wants to preserve, to keep him going over the pressure of the coming months. He wants to remember every detail; the way Zuko looks in his clothes, the feel of Zuko’s body pressed against his, the gentle swaying as their dance dissolves into small movements, the happiness of being surrounded by friends and family, the gentle brush of Zuko’s lip when they touch to his neck and the shiver it sends down Sokka’s spine.

“I love you,” Sokka whispers, close to Zuko’s ear, “so much.”

Zuko pulls back, ever so slightly, so he can meet Sokka’s eyes and, just like every time, Sokka is amazed by the warmth he finds in them, an endless sea of gold that he could spend eternity in. “I love you, too,” Zuko says, and Sokka doesn’t need to think before he pulls Zuko in close, kissing him with a blind, desperate need to show him how _much_ he loves him, with his entire heart, his whole being, more than he ever knew he could love.

If he could, Sokka would stay preserved in this moment forever, the two of them endlessly spinning as one single being, no longer separate. But Sokka knows this is the first of many moments, that even though the next few months will be difficult, it’ll make it all worth it by the lifetime it opens up for them, filled with dancing and kissing and the pure joy that only Zuko can bring. A lifetime of making Zuko smile, blush, and laugh. And if that’s all he ever does, Sokka will be happy.


	25. Epilogue

The ocean is calm, peaceful, the land ahead fast approaching with a bittersweet feeling that Sokka just can’t shake. He’s happy to go back to university, for things to be normal again, but not like this. Ozai has been imprisoned, his bending gone (which, apparently, Aang can do now?), and the Fire Nation happy to be rid of him as soon as his plans came to light. Sokka _should_ be happy, should be relieved that it’s all over and the world is safe again. But he’s not.

“Still moping out here?” Katara asks, joining him on the railing of the ferry they're taking back to Ba Sing Se.

Sokka sinks further into his slouch over the railing, the lights of the city ahead only making him more miserable. He’s loved living in Ba Sing Se, but it’s not the same city without Zuko.

“You’ll get to see him plenty,” Katara offers, “his coronation is in a few weeks, we’ll visit then. And you know he’ll find any excuse to come to the city.”

“It’s not the same,” Sokka mumbles, looking down at the waves lapping against the side of the boat, “I wanted things to be _normal_ and to have one single moment where we just get to be a regular couple.”

“I know,” Katara says, shuffling closer but not saying any more. They both know there’s nothing much more to say. There were a few, brief but incredible, months of almost normality. After Ozai had been defeated, Iroh took over as interim Fire Lord and they all stayed in Royal Caldera City, resting and recuperating after months of camping and training and exhaustion. Those months were amazing, getting to spend time with Zuko and his friends and just _relax_. Plus, the Fire Nation knows its way round spicy cuisine. Sokka’s not sure how he’ll go back to the significantly tamer Earth Kingdom food after it.

However, those months were still overshadowed by the looming coronation. Zuko would be taking over as Fire Lord and was in and out of meetings more and more each day. He was getting burnt out, and exhausted, and it was killing Sokka. He’d tried to tell Zuko, so many times, that he shouldn’t do it, should let his uncle run the country for at least a little bit longer. But Zuko being as stubborn as he is, had been insistent that it’s his duty to help his nation recover from the scar Ozai left on it, needs to restore the honour of his country and re-balance the world. Zuko wouldn’t listen when Sokka told him that entire responsibility shouldn’t be just on _him_.

“How are you coping?” Sokka asks, needing a distraction from his own woes and knowing Katara is probably struggling just as much.

Katara shrugs. “At least Aang will be living in Ba Sing Se, even if he’s not there half the time.” Aang, too, had had to drop his studies in favour of his worldly duties, knowing the avatar can’t be sitting in a classroom when the world is out of balance and needs his help. Katara and Sokka both insisted that _they_ can help, that this isn’t entirely Zuko and Aang’s burden to bear, but neither of them wanted to hear it. Hakoda, too, told them they can’t waste their opportunity to get an education (even if it is somewhat bittersweet from Ozai’s manipulation) and the world can wait. Toph didn’t need convincing, telling Aang outright that she already helped him save the world with defeating Ozai, she’s not about to miss out on learning about cool things to wander around the world talking politics. Sokka did, however, hear bits and pieces of her and Katara talking about how university will prove to her parents that she’s capable in the ways they deem worthy, but he decided to leave all that for Katara to deal with.

Sokka sighs. “Why did we have to pick two of the most important people in the world?”

Katara shakes her head, “We’re idiots, that's why. I’m gonna go get our stuff together and wake up Toph, we’re almost there.”

Sokka nods and looks back out across the ocean, not knowing what to expect from the next year, but knowing it’ll be difficult. He’s hardly left Zuko’s side since they first escaped his sister, and now they need to live on the other side of the world. Even the journey has been long and torturous without him.

“Wow, you’re sulking just as much as Katara,” Toph says from directly behind Sokka, making him jump with an embarrassing yelp.

Sokka rolls his eyes, “At least Aang will be moving to the city next week.”

Toph scoffs, blowing her hair out of her face, “Right, as if he’ll last that long. He’ll be here tomorrow, I bet.”

“You _bet_ , huh?”

“Oh no, I’m not making any more bets with you,” Toph says, crossing her arms, “you got _all_ their relationship milestones down. I don’t know how you do it.”

Sokka shrugs, “I know my sister. But this is _Aang_ we’re talking about, now.”

“You’re really thinking Aang will last more than two seconds before trying to see Katara? You’re playing a losers game.”

“Is that a deal, then?”

Toph sighs but sticks her hand out. Sokka takes it and shakes it with a bit of overdramatic flair.

“I’ll get your money out of you, one day,” Toph says, and Sokka laughs with the confidence of someone yet to lose a bet.

“You two sound chipper,” Katara says, bags in hand, shoving them into Sokka and Toph’s chests.

“Just betting on Aang’s patience,” Toph says, with another laugh.

Katara raises one eyebrow, but doesn’t look surprised, “It’s more than Zuko’s.”

Toph snorts, and Sokka feels like he’s been left out of the loop on something, but shrugs it off because the boat is docking, the ramp lowering and people spilling out onto the harbour.

Sokka is in his head, thoughts going no further than trying to keep Toph and Katara in sight amongst the crowd of people. It takes him an embarrassingly long time to notice what’s directly in front of him. They’ve gotten off the boat okay, separated from the crowd of people, but Toph and Katara stop dead in their tracks and Sokka nearly goes hurtling into them.

“Pay up, Katara,” Toph is saying, with a hand held out. Katara groans but drops some coins into her palm. Sokka frowns, confused at what Toph could’ve been betting over this time, but then that all drops away when he sees what they’re looking at. Beyond them, stood on the harbour, in his full royal regalia and prince’s crown.

“ _Zuko_?” Sokka breathes out, a mix of confusion and happiness and he doesn’t know what. He’s confused, that Zuko’s here, stood in front of him when he’s supposed to be hundreds of miles away in the Fire Nation, but Sokka’s not about to question a miracle, and goes barrelling towards him, almost knocking him to the ground with the force of the hug he wraps him in.

“ _Sokka_ ,” Zuko says into his neck, sounding just as happy as Zuko feels, squeezing him back just as tight.

“What are you _doing_ here?” Sokka asks, pulling away just enough to be able to look at Zuko, to take in his face. It’s not like it’s been a long time since they last saw each other, but Sokka had prepared himself for it to be a long time, so the relief is overwhelming.

“I spoke to my uncle. We both decided getting an education is important,” Zuko says, and Sokka’s hopes soar, holding tight onto Zuko’s words and waiting for the explicit confirmation, “especially to be Fire Lord. So, what’s delaying my coronation by a few years?”

“You’re serious?” Sokka says, “You’re coming back? For good?”

Zuko nods, pulling Sokka into a kiss, “For good,” he mumbles against his lips, holding his face tight between his hands, and Sokka’s _sure_ he must be dreaming.

“How did you get here so quick?” he asks as soon as Zuko pulls away.

“I, uh, took my own ship. I wanted to be here by the time you arrived on the ferry,” Zuko says, cheeks rosy.

“You’re…” Sokka has no words, so he just pulls Zuko back in again, hugging him tight. “You’re really staying?” he asks into Zuko’s neck.

“Really,” Zuko says into his hair.

Sokka walks through the streets of Ba Sing Se, alone but happy. His arms are filled with a crate of different teas, starting to ache after carrying it all the way from Iroh’s old supplier. Sokka decides the next time he sees Iroh he needs to criticise his choice to deal with the supplier the _entire_ other side of Ba Sing Se, instead of someone closer. A year ago, Sokka really wouldn’t have imagined he’d be considering chastising the Fire Lord, not long after helping defeat and imprison the previous Fire Lord and _dating_ the next Fire Lord. Sokka wants to laugh, remembering his dad talking about how much his life will change across university. Sokka hadn’t believed it; thought maybe he’d make some new friends and experience a culture outside of his own, but beyond that, he really didn’t expect much. _This_ …running a tea shop and living with the Crown Prince of the Fire Nation, his _boyfriend_ , while Katara is dating _the avatar_ , was the last thing he expected.

Luckily, Sokka gets to the Jasmine Dragon before his arms give way, and he kicks the door open ( _gently_ , remembering Iroh’s threats to look after his tea shop), dumping the crate down on one of the tables. The inside is looking a lot better than when he’d left it; now cleaned and set up for business, thanks to Zuko.

“Is that the tea?” Zuko calls out from the kitchen, sounding like he’s stuck his head in a cupboard.

“Yeah, your uncle really knows how to pick the _furthest_ supplier imaginable, I-” Sokka walks through to the kitchen, stopping when he sees Zuko on his knees, trying to clear out all the burnt pieces from the fireplace and looking like he’s just making more mess in the process. He drags himself out, sitting back on his heels, and Sokka can’t help but laugh. He’s got soot up to his elbows, covering his clothes, across his cheeks and nose, and no doubt all in his hair, too.

“You look a mess,” Sokka says, getting a frown from Zuko.

“This is hard,” Zuko says, trying to brush the soot off of his arms but just smudging it round, making it worse.

“Sometimes it’s so easy to forget you grew up with servants. Until…” Sokka says, gesturing round at the now soot-covered kitchen. Zuko looks round, too, as if only just seeing his mess for the first time.

“Shit,” Zuko says, “my bad. I’ll clean it.”

Sokka shakes his head, “No way, I’ll ask Katara to do some waterbending magic. I’m not letting you anywhere near that fireplace ever again,” he says, helping Zuko up off the floor.

“You realise how contradictory that is, right?”

“Fine, you can light and put out the fire. Nothing more.”

“Sounds good to me,” Zuko says, with a smile, coming in close and wrapping an arm round Sokka’s waist. Sokka flinches away, trying to stop Zuko’s soot-covered clothes from making contact with his own, _perfectly_ clean, clothes. Zuko is annoyingly persistent and pulls Sokka in close anyway, a knowing smile on his lips.

“You’re the worst,” Sokka says, but it’s with a laugh. He licks his thumb and wipes some of the soot off of Zuko’s nose, which wrinkles in disgust, only making Sokka laugh more. “You did a good job with the rest of the shop, though.”

“You should’ve _seen_ the dust in here. It took forever.”

Sokka laughs, kissing him on his soot-stained cheek.

“You’re lucky I love you, you know,” Sokka says, looking down at the black mark between the two of them, “if _anyone_ else had done this to my clothes.” Zuko’s lucky Sokka’s not wearing nice clothes, then even love might not be enough to save him.

Zuko just laughs, far too confident for a man playing with fire. “Do you think we’ll have time to clean ourselves up before everyone gets here?”

Sokka opens his mouth, interrupted by the bell above the door ringing out front. “No,” he says, taking Zuko’s hand and leading him out of the kitchen and onto the main floor, where Katara, Aang, and Toph are already settling in at a table like they own the place.

“What on earth happened to you two?” Katara asks as soon as she sees them.

“What?” Toph says, “What’s wrong with them?”

“They’re covered in…soot?” Aang says.

“Zuko tried to clear out the fireplace,” Sokka explains, sitting down. “He’s not good at it.”

Zuko shrugs, taking the seat next to Sokka, “I did my best.”

“Hey, you’re our servers now, no sitting down on the job,” Toph says, “I want some tea.”

Sokka tries to stand, but Zuko beats him to it, a hand on his shoulder forcing him back down before he disappears into the kitchen.

“Enjoying your new tea shop?” Katara asks, with a teasing smile.

Sokka nods, “The apartment is _way_ better than our old dorms. The bed is _massive_ compared to those pathetic single beds.”

Toph snorts, “You two utilising all that space?” she asks, which gets a swift elbow to the ribs from Sokka.

“How’s _your_ new place?” he asks, trying to move on from _that_ line of conversation quickly, knowing Zuko would probably spontaneously combust if he came back out into it.

Toph groans. “It's great that my parents paid for it and all, but they tried to give us a _guard_ to watch over me. Like I need that! And they wouldn’t even listen to me, it took Mr. Avatar over there to convince them I was in good hands.”

Sokka laughs, “As if you wouldn’t be the first line of defence.”

“Exactly!”

Zuko comes back through, tea tray in hand.

“You heated that tea up quickly,” Katara says, one eyebrow raised.

“Uh…”

“Come on, like you wouldn’t abuse firebending if you had it,” Toph says. Zuko sets the tray down for them, and they all take a cup.

“I know I would,” Sokka says.

“I know it’s probably not as good as my uncles,” Zuko says, watching everyone take a sip carefully.

“No, it’s good,” Aang says, through somewhat gritted teeth.

“He’s lying,” Toph says, which gets a glare from Aang.

“Tea requires more of a…delicate touch,” Katara says, "I think."

“I like your fire tea,” Sokka says. It’s not 100% truthful, but it’s not a whole lie. It doesn’t hold a candle to Iroh’s, but Sokka isn’t fussy and, in reality, can’t much tell the different between a good and a bad cup of tea.

Zuko raises a sceptical eyebrow but doesn’t try to dispute it.

“Will you guys really be able to fit running an entire tea shop around classes?” Katara asks, “Are you sure you don’t need help?”

“We’ll be fine,” Zuko says.

“Iroh contacted all the people that used to work here and most of them are coming back,” Sokka says, “besides, it can’t be any more stressful than our last semester, right?”

“Don’t remind me,” Toph groans, “the worst part was having to listen to you coming back to the dorms every other day moaning about Zuko.”

“What?” Zuko says.

Sokka tries not to choke on his tea.

Toph puts on a terrible imitation of Sokka’s voice, “I hate Zuko, but I love Zuko. He’s so hot why does he have to be _Fire Nation_. Why do I have to be partnered with him I can’t keep it in my pants that long.”

“I never- I didn’t-”

Everyone bursts into laughter, Toph the most. Zuko, somehow, looks even more embarrassed than Sokka feels.

Toph leans back in her chair with a cocky smile, crossing her ankles on the table. “Yeah, I’d say this semester will definitely be better without having to deal with you two pining over each other.”

Katara laughs the most, then.

“Don’t you get started,” Toph says, “you two were just as bad. And you guys didn’t have to hear what Katara was like in our room- _ugh_. ‘Aang is so nice, and funny, and great I can’t wait to spend all day drooling over him tomorrow,’” she says, in just as poor an imitation of Katara’s voice. Sokka thinks it’s _spot on_ , though.

Sokka laughs, hard, enjoying the payback on Katara, but when he looks over to her, Aang is giving her a soppy look that makes him want to retch. _Especially_ when the two of them whisper something together and share a brief kiss. “No, oogies, gross.”

Katara rolls her eyes, “You two are _far_ worse.”

“We would _never_ ,” Sokka puts a hand to his chest in mock offence, but to be fair, his chair is directly next to Zuko’s, and he is leaning as much of his body against him as possible. Maybe Katara has a point. But at least they’re not _kissing_ in front of everyone.

Aang looks between the glare fixed between Sokka and Katara, eyeing them warily. “Hey, uh,” he says, pulling Katara back and trying to diffuse the tension, “how’s everyone feeling about your classes starting Monday? Ready for a new year?”

“ _Definitely_ ,” Katara says, “I’m not going to miss sleeping in a tent and training dawn till dusk.”

“ _Tell_ me about it,” Toph says, “I’m ready for a nice, boring year with no evil Fire Lords on the horizon.”

“Agreed,” Sokka says, grabbing and squeezing Zuko’s hand tight. The past year had been insane, to say the least, and it had gone entirely differently to how he’d expected, but not in a bad way. If he could change it, go back, and choose not to go to university – even though it would mean no invasion, no getting hit by lightning, no nomad-living and stressful training – he wouldn’t, wouldn’t change a single thing about the past year at all. Because it meant he ended up where he is now, surrounded by his friends, with someone he loves more than anything, completely happy. It had been a hard year, but one of the best of his life, and he wouldn’t change it for the world. Looking at Zuko now, a smile on his face, he knows he's exactly where he's supposed to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we reached the end!! thank you to everyone who's read, left kudos, and commented i appreciate you all so much!  
> because i can't be alone with my thoughts for more than one second, i've already started another zukka fic which you guys should check out [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29336142) and let me know what you think!


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